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How rare are girls like this


In Search Of... Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.

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Old 11th March 2019, 11:42 AM   #16
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If you want a slave/gf/wife you need to go to Asia/South America/Central America. You will not find that here!

It does not sound like such a great relationship to me, his gf is messed up obviously from where and how she was brought up. She was looking for a way out of her situation, he was it...

In South America guys are very controlling a holes, much like your friend sounds... When I lived in Brazil I had so many women because I treated them right. They would tell me how men are there and how they could not stand them and how they were treated by them...

Your friend is typical of Latin culture, American women will never put up with how he is. If you want a good woman you should not act like your friend.

I wish you luck
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Old 11th March 2019, 3:42 PM   #17
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Guys thank you for all your responses. I greatly appreciate it. Like I said this friend/coworker admitted that he was a bit paranoid, I forgot to add that he's eased up tremendously (according to him), and he's also given her his passwords to his social media accounts and has unfriended various girls per her request. I don't blame him for doing that because yes, a lot of girls do want escapes from their past situations.

The thing is, I like the sound of this guy's relationship. He takes care of her, loves her, and spoils her, and it looks like she's doing the same. I just want a woman in my life eventually who would treat me like a prince/king, like I would treat them like a princess/queen..

From some of his lavish stories about their dates, this guy takes her dancing quite a bit, they go on road trips every chance they get, he's treated her to a cruise (we get discounts where we work for vacation spots), he sounds just as romantic in return, because he says that he's written love letters or poems back..

The thing I want a loyal, loving woman who cooks for me like I would cook for her, would take care of me like I would take care of her, who is up for fun dates, and puts out on sex on demand. I know the latter sounds kinda bad but who wants a bitter woman who withholds love? Not me..
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Old 11th March 2019, 3:54 PM   #18
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There is nothing wrong with wanting a mutually loving relationship.

What this guy has sounds more like a girlfriend who is afraid to step out of line and not play the role of Happy Little Housewife in front of his friends. I would bet any money what happens behind closed doors is a very different reality from what they present to the world. What he tells people and the performance they put on in others' presence might be a far cry from what goes on when it's only the two of them.

Does she benefit in some way? Sure, it sounds like there are some material comforts.

Is it a relationship you should really strive to replicate? No. It is unhealthy and you need to understand that all that devotion and love she supposedly shows is probably coming from a place of fear and anxiety if she doesn't follow his orders and cater to his desires. You are admiring a relationship that is superficially sparkly, but probably very rusty under the shiny surface.
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Old 11th March 2019, 4:11 PM   #19
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I am going to assume that she really does not have a choice to go along with
what he wants, where is she going to go? She left a bad, abusive situation to be with this guy, in another bad, abusive relationship.

I also assume she does not have many, if any friends. Can't go out of the house when she wants without telling him where, with who, and when to be back... She is young, has issues, and probably does not know anything but this guy.
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Old 11th March 2019, 6:12 PM   #20
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Yeah , in their particular situation she's young and has had some stuff. She could completely about flip later and hate the lifestyle she has now, no way to know.
But what you seek isn't so rare , it's basically just old school. that's out there in any race you just need to be selective and hone in on what suits you in a woman.
l dunno what age you are but there are many guys and gals around old school , traditional or whatever you wanna call it.
My gf if 51and yep she's still as hot as hell and def' no idiot but she loves the traditional or whatever you wanna call it lifestyle between her and her man and we both look after each other in all these ways and many more.
lt suits my lifestyle and hers and it suits all the things we both love in a relationship and life and the way we both like to live.

However in your case , you sound fairly young and so the women you meet will be fairly young too and that's where what we all want gets tricky , like your friends girl.
As l say my girl is 51 and she knows herself very well , but someone a lot younger might think she wants this and that but who knows how she'll feel in 5yrs time and want later.
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Old 11th March 2019, 6:17 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by somelamedude View Post
and puts out on sex on demand. I know the latter sounds kinda bad but who wants a bitter woman who withholds love? Not me..
You do know that there's a huge gap between sex on demand and being bitter and withholding love, right?
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Old 11th March 2019, 6:24 PM   #22
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This woman sounds God sent
I don't know why many women here say bad things about her.
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Old 11th March 2019, 6:30 PM   #23
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This woman sounds God sent
I don't know why many women here say bad things about her.
I'm not saying bad things about her. Rather, I pity her because she's skipped straight from one abuser to another. She needs help - not admiration.
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Old 11th March 2019, 6:38 PM   #24
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She's chasing the dad she never had, I think. What happens with those is eventually it becomes too father/daughter and the sex goes down the drain because who wants to have sex with their father.

Let's hope she isn't that messed up and that he isn't.
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Old 11th March 2019, 6:55 PM   #25
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Well you can learn something from him. Obviously, he’s controlling, insecure and lied about his age. So simply don’t do the negative stuff he did. But what are the things he did right? you mentioned that he’s happy all the time, funny, and he’s ripped, so he’s fit. The girl is obviously physically attracted to him which is why she put up with his stuff. She won’t put up with him if he’s not her type. But she stayed with the guy and takes care of him because he’s physically fit, funny, and has a personality. There you go. And like you said, he also takes her out on dates and go to different places. Maybe she interprets his controlling ways as protective. Maybe she’s insecure. She wants a father figure type but she also wants someone she’s physically attracted too. She found him cute. That fulfills her needs. But he also has those things which made her stay with him ie. funny, happy all the time, a personality, takes care of her, etc...

As far as finding a beautiful, classy woman. Look no further than George Clooney. He really has a nice way about him. He really is a throwback to the classic Hollywood male star. He waited a really long time to marry someone and when he did he landed what most men would dream of marrying. Don’t lower your standards. She’s out there. If she has exes in the background, smokes, an alcoholic, does drugs otherwise or “recreationally”, is structured, controlling, emotionally unavailable, or jaded and bitter, then drop her. You don’t have to put up with any of that. It may take awhile but she is out there. It’s a numbers game.

Last edited by Interstellar; 11th March 2019 at 6:58 PM..
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Old 11th March 2019, 9:36 PM   #26
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Originally Posted by somelamedude View Post
The thing I want a loyal, loving woman who cooks for me like I would cook for her, would take care of me like I would take care of her, who is up for fun dates, and puts out on sex on demand. I know the latter sounds kinda bad but who wants a bitter woman who withholds love? Not me..
Hey wouldn't we all! I just don't see it myself any more.
I would say it is very rare to find couples where both parties are as dedicated to each other as the one you describe due in large part to the obstacles posed by social media and dating apps. The internet is a low investment, low risk, yet high reward source of attention for when a relationship hits a rocky patch...hell even when everything is great. Everyone is looking for the next best thing 24/7. Have a read of the infidelity forums, they are full of marriages that have lasted for 20 years only to crash and burn because the old childhood sweetheart got in touch via facebook and the FOMO was too much to resist.. It's almost cliché how much of a trope it has become.

Anyway, good luck in your search. If you find a relationship like that lemme know if she has a twin sister

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 12th March 2019 at 2:35 PM..
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Old 12th March 2019, 12:31 AM   #27
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yEah , said it 100 times , the internet and modern media is about the worst thing could've happened to marriage and relationships.
That's one good thing about starting again at this age , you both know what you want and your both well aware of all the bs out there these days and when both of you can see through it all and not care less about any of it , want the same things, realize this is really gonna be your last shot ,and all of your mistakes through life , yaknow , in so many ways it's just a really nice place to be now.
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Old 12th March 2019, 1:54 AM   #28
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I've seen her out with her girlfriends before.. she's not some stuck at home wifey roled girlfriend. I think, and mind you, I would have to "ask him" but I am sure once she proved herself to not me some hoe, that he let her go out.. and no this guy never lied about his age to my understanding... he has one of those baby faced boyish looks.. he told me before she found him (she messaged him first according to his story) that a lot of women felt uncomfortable at his age range that he preferred: 27-36 because he doesn't look anything like a 30 something year old man.. I mean if I could post a pic, you guys would call BS that he's 30 but he is.

I am starting to agree too, what's all the hate towards their relationship and her? I stated that he admitted that later he wanted things to be fair and had her pick out which chicks she wanted gone and cut his friend list down a bit on various social media sites.. it seems fair.. I've also seen him when we're at work send her messages when he's about to hit the gym, so she checks up on him too..

This doesn't seem one sided, and I agree that he seemed a bit crazy at first, but after reading some of your posts about relationship issues, I'm not surprised that this guy did what he did. She must really really love him if she did go through a year with him to prove she isn't some hoe.

But it still stands, I want a loving woman like this
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Old 12th March 2019, 9:22 AM   #29
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Originally Posted by somelamedude View Post
I am sure once she proved herself to not me some hoe, that he let her go out..
LET her? That is where you lost every sane woman on this thread. A relationship is not a prison sentence & no SO is the other's warden who controls when & where a partner goes.


Quote:
Originally Posted by somelamedude View Post
This doesn't seem one sided, and I agree that he seemed a bit crazy at first, but after reading some of your posts about relationship issues, I'm not surprised that this guy did what he did. She must really really love him if she did go through a year with him to prove she isn't some hoe.

But it still stands, I want a loving woman like this
You want a scared sycophant who you can control? What you described is not love. It's desperation. This girl is doing what she has to do to survive. This guy puts a roof over her had & doesn't beat her. It's a step up from the abuse she previously endured.

Make no mistake this is not love. It's Stockholm Syndrome.

I have always been a loyal loving partner to every man I ever dated but I'm not much of a housekeeper I would never stand for somebody telling me I had to prove myself not to be a hoe. I'd walk in a heartbeat if some guy tried to regulate my social interactions. I treat my partners well & expect to be treated well in return. That is a good relationship.

What you are describing is some anachronistic domestic D/s fetish.

Last edited by d0nnivain; 12th March 2019 at 9:37 AM..
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Old 12th March 2019, 12:07 PM   #30
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This woman sounds God sent
I don't know why many women here say bad things about her.
I see alot of women being selfless and giving and giving and giving

and that is a very good thing. in a relationship it is important to not be selfish. its important to be a giver.

it is a beautiful thing to love your man

however

I see too many women being selfless and giving and loving and basically doing everything to make a man happy...to their own detriment. they dont get the same in return.

they aim to please and its clear that the relationship that they are in is not healthy to themselves

this is a problem. its disgusting. too many women either have low self esteem overall or have low esteem moments when they fall for a guy. and I absolutely hate that for them because of the hell I got tired of myself being the same way in the past.

so my personal disdain is towards that (not necessarily the woman in this post). im disgusted at the position women find themselves in more than anything.
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