Try again? (Updated)

[mortensorchid]

I was looking around again at all the happiness and whatever else and thinking I want that still. How come it's so hard for me when it's so easy for everyone else? At least, it seems to be with so many.

 

My self esteem has been shattered in a million pieces by rejection after rejection after rejection from so many. Most of them are losers or guys who will not make commitments to me but will to someone who will take them for a ride, cheat on them, abuse them, etc. There's someone inside me that says "Don't give up! Remember who you were before you were such a bitter person. You're not too old, etc." That hope usually disappears within minutes of an OLD and I am back to the drawing board.

 

Should I put a profile back up again and try again? I NEVER meet anyone without the internet.

[OatsAndHall]

Well.. How're you filtering guys out on OLD? If you're continually running into tools, that might be the issue.

[Ruby Slippers]

Yes! Do it! We can trade war stories

 

I just got back on a dating site today after almost a year away. Now that I've given up on finding Mr. Perfect, I can just go out and have some fun. Of course there are tons of lovely men who want to make that happen. I can barely keep up with the messages. I'm enjoying being the new girl as long as it lasts lol

[coolheadal]

I was looking around again at all the happiness and whatever else and thinking I want that still. How come it's so hard for me when it's so easy for everyone else? At least, it seems to be with so many.

 

My self esteem has been shattered in a million pieces by rejection after rejection after rejection from so many. Most of them are losers or guys who will not make commitments to me but will to someone who will take them for a ride, cheat on them, abuse them, etc. There's someone inside me that says "Don't give up! Remember who you were before you were such a bitter person. You're not too old, etc." That hope usually disappears within minutes of an OLD and I am back to the drawing board.

 

Should I put a profile back up again and try again? I NEVER meet anyone without the internet.

 

Due too Hurricane Irma in 9/17 I drove last year into you area, but never thought about you though if I did I would have posted my travels too LS under Off Topic and you would I've know I was in OH. I would never treated you like what you have described. Anyway I just wanted to say that to you. I respect you for who are. My fellow Star Trek Buddy. Are you playing STO - Star Trek Online Game btw? Anyway the men you seek are not good choices. You can't blame everyone you encounter. How come you never seek them from job or places you normally attend. Forget OLD apps they're not working like they did years ago where people respected each other online. Out of all the women I met on OLD, not turned out to be what I wanted. They lied, cheated, rude, wanted money, wanted only to be taken out to eat, had kids, had adult kids, grand kids, grand mothers, mothers, brothers, brothers GF, adult kids GF all living in one house. Most of the women were dirty, all sorts of behavior problems. I was better to find someone outside the OLD, like friends party, JOB (ouch).

 

You just meeting the wrong type of men from OLD. Look for ST-OLD people you have stuff in common. I enjoy computers, movies, music, Start Trek Orville, The 100, Supernatural, Future Man (started to get into that series) Timeless and more. But that's me what else beside LS are you into. That is where you should be looking for a guy who's likes the things you do.

 

But we're here for you though. Sometimes those of us here who give advise can't stop to think we also need advise sometimes.

 

PS Driving through OHIO Turnpike was long and boring.. I was coming back from ID and headed to VA to stay with my long close friend I met him on AOL staying with him and his wife. Doing Irma when Florida roads were shutdown. I really did say much here when I was away on my PTO - pay time off vacation. Did 3,666 miles fuel for my SUV ouch over $1K with tools. But I did see people I knew off FB from my groups that I run on FB. Anyway cheer up my friend you'll meet the guy of your dreams but you need to change your strategy like I did.

[carhill]

As far as the putting up profile thing goes, IMO if you don't feel positive about it without reservation, leave it. Do some other stuff in life. I get what you mean about not meeting anyone outside of OLD, it went the same way for me a generation ago, everyone was married, but still the forays into OLD after horrors of telephone dating took a leap of faith and a positive outlook. TBH, it turned out great. Met some good ladies and married one. We're not married anymore but had many good years together and whatever ended us had nothing to do with OLD.

 

You know you'll get deluged with messages when you put your profile back up so make sure it's at a high and positive point. That's the person a compatible life partner will want to find and appreciate.

[coolheadal]

 

Should I put a profile back up again and try again? I NEVER meet anyone without the internet.

 

You need to meet someone without the internet. You are so much like me in many ways, but I too did rely on the internet for dates. It's not the same like it was years ago. They have ruin it. Quality dating is gone. You know it now.

[nospam99]

Should I put a profile back up again and try again? I NEVER meet anyone without the internet.

 

Disclaimer: I've been 'on' OLD for 11 months and not only haven't I met 'the one', the only 'a one (meaning a potential 'the one')' I met dumped me.

 

That said, I believe one significant variable is which OLD site you're using. The ONLY two that I've found 'good enough to keep using' are POF and Match. What site(s) are you using?

[guest569]

Tinder is pretty good.

[alphamale]

Tinder is pretty good.

 

how much does it cost per month?

[brigit87]

I was looking around again at all the happiness and whatever else and thinking I want that still. How come it's so hard for me when it's so easy for everyone else? At least, it seems to be with so many.

 

My self esteem has been shattered in a million pieces by rejection after rejection after rejection from so many. Most of them are losers or guys who will not make commitments to me but will to someone who will take them for a ride, cheat on them, abuse them, etc. There's someone inside me that says "Don't give up! Remember who you were before you were such a bitter person. You're not too old, etc." That hope usually disappears within minutes of an OLD and I am back to the drawing board.

 

Should I put a profile back up again and try again? I NEVER meet anyone without the internet.

 

Move to Alaska.Lots of men there.

[normal person]

How come it's so hard for me when it's so easy for everyone else?

 

You live in Northeast Ohio, and I'm assuming you're 40+. Even if you live in Cleveland, there just aren't a lot of people where you are, let alone single and in your age bracket. If this was something you were serious about you might want to consider moving to a bigger city where the odds are more favorable to you. Columbus would be better but nearly as good as Chicago or LA (last I checked there were more men there than women by a noticeable amount). You can't catch a fish in a puddle. You need to look in a pond, or better yet, a lake.

[caveman621]

I'll give the same OLD I always give. Go on dates. Try to have fun. But don't go in with the "I'm looking for my LTM soulmate" attitude. Just a drink or a meal and, hopefully, some pleasant conversations. If there is no spark, move on. And share any funny "horror stories" with us!

[Happy Lemming]

Should I put a profile back up again and try again? I NEVER meet anyone without the internet.

 

What is wrong with a two prong approach?? In addition to having an OLD account, why can't you go out to your local pub and be social?? The more fishing lines you put in the water, the better your chance of landing a fish!!

 

How come it's so hard for me when it's so easy for everyone else? At least, it seems to be with so many.

 

Maybe these other women slept with their guys on the first date??

 

Many years ago, I asked this woman out to dinner (first date). The date didn't go so well and she seemed rather plain and boring as we talked during dinner. I had made my mind up (early in the date) that I wouldn't ask her out again. As the date ended, she invited me in for a "cup of coffee" and one thing led to another and we slept together. The sex was mind blowing!! Of course I asked her out again and after a better second date, we had great sex, again. Which led to a third, forth, fifth, date, etc. etc. As I got to know her better we became more and more compatible and she turned out to not be so "plain and boring". We ended up dating a couple of years and really had a blast.

 

Have you thought about sleeping with a guy on the first date, if he seems half decent??

[SevenCity]

I was looking around again at all the happiness and whatever else and thinking I want that still. How come it's so hard for me when it's so easy for everyone else? At least, it seems to be with so many.

 

My self esteem has been shattered in a million pieces by rejection after rejection after rejection from so many. Most of them are losers or guys who will not make commitments to me but will to someone who will take them for a ride, cheat on them, abuse them, etc. There's someone inside me that says "Don't give up! Remember who you were before you were such a bitter person. You're not too old, etc." That hope usually disappears within minutes of an OLD and I am back to the drawing board.

 

Should I put a profile back up again and try again? I NEVER meet anyone without the internet.

 

If you are looking for someone to make you happy, you will find nothing but misery.

 

Happiness has to come from within and not another person.

 

Master that, and you will have a much better chance at a successful relationship.

[mortensorchid]

That was a stupid idea. I am just not one of those people who should be with someone. I just have to resolve it.

[Happy Lemming]

That was a stupid idea.

 

How is it stupid idea?? Guys enjoy sex... You have casual sex with your FWB person.

 

These other women are able to secure your leftovers for long term relationships, there has to be a reason.

 

You seem to have an inordinate amount of trouble getting a guy to call you back for a second or third date. What exactly are you doing on the first date to turn all of these guys off and have them running away??

 

If you ask for help, don't put down a suggestion with the words "stupid"...

[coolheadal]

That was a stupid idea. I am just not one of those people who should be with someone. I just have to resolve it.

 

No you should be with with someone. Look here we're all your friends here on LS we all care about you. Trying to give advise as well as you give advise here.

 

Sometimes in life we think we really don't need anyone but we really do. That's why there was Adam and Eve. But one thing that wasn't place in our souls the path to the right mate/partner. That's why we all struggle to find that right partner. But a long the way we all run into the worst ones.

 

It hasn't been easy for me either. I really thought the woman I met at work was it, but it's not I have to keep looking. She has notice I am different I have too. All she wants is Money and Food, doesn't care what I want. Love and have Fun do fun things. Her fun is to gamble, play numbers, lottery every day, casino for 8 hours or more, hustle, scheme an etc. I am not into that. Now she has a new buddy she can do all that with. I am left to the dust. Not really I am looking else way again. But not on OLD never again. I surround by the beach I'll use that along with my Reiki. Right now I am not looking for anyone to be with either because I need to get myself together first.

 

But for you do whatever you have to do to live and just maybe you need to leave Ohio and take a vacation drive outside the State. Even come to South Florida if you want. Or the Keys like Key West. Or fly outside the USA. Make your life happy again. You just never know who you will end up with.