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Ok, throwing it out there to the forum, what do YOU do?


mortensorchid

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mortensorchid

I was googling the ever present question "where does one go to meet people"? I have posted my thoughts and feelings on a few things. I realize there are a lot of people out there who have their own opinions and whatnot, both on the forum and elsewhere, but I thought I would throw this out to the forum in case I never did before :

 

Where do YOU go to meet people? Is it all online? Outside of the internet, what do you do? Or is it all internet things? Tell me your answers as I am curious.

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I was googling the ever present question "where does one go to meet people"? I have posted my thoughts and feelings on a few things. I realize there are a lot of people out there who have their own opinions and whatnot, both on the forum and elsewhere, but I thought I would throw this out to the forum in case I never did before :

 

Where do YOU go to meet people? Is it all online? Outside of the internet, what do you do? Or is it all internet things? Tell me your answers as I am curious.

 

Technically speaking, I've met people through in all kinds of situations. It really depends on you being open to meeting them.

 

Classes? Clubs? Family / Friends BBQ's.

 

I know that sounds kind of weird, but in the end, you just have to be around people. I've heard stories of women dating their taxi drivers.

 

You never know when you'll cross paths with someone. The trick is to be open to it I guess.

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Funny that.

l felt like the beach yesterday, 30min drive from here but l just felt like it soooo, l went to the beach for the arvo,

laying round like a slob l look up and two girls are doodling about right in front of me.

One was a beautiful asian and the other equally but indian l think but the indian def' had things on her mind and stuck around for 15mins.

l smiled and stuff but as cute as she was l'm sorta seein someone right now sooo, had to go with my as cute as you are l'm really sorry but not right now look.

 

Probly if l was all lost and desperate all l'd get is sea gulls right :bunny:

 

Point is , it's a strong belief of mine , do what you do yaknow, true to whatever you feel at the time , life.

l've had two great loves in my life and that's all l was doing both times.

But eh , that's me.

Edited by Chilli
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Interstellar

When I was in the nursing program at school one of the skills that we needed to learn was called wheelchair transfer. It’s about transferring a patient safely from bed to wheelchair and vice versa.it has a role playing aspect to it because you and your partner will pretend to be the patient then the nurse and you switch roles. I was looking for a partner and there she was, a young beautiful blonde girl. Honestly, there was no one else, because everyone is paired up. I asked her if she wants to practice wheelchair transfer and she said yes. Of course she was shy at first, I’m a stranger. But she got over that quickly because I’m not a creep. Let’s just say we were embracing each other before we even knew each other’s names. It also made me understand why movie actors fall in love with their leading ladies. If you’re embracing each other all day, you can’t help it. So yeah, take nursing.

 

No, she didn’t become my gf or anything. That program was super stressful.

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FilterCoffee

Currently I’m not really looking to meet people because I’m still getting over my ex but before I started dating her, I would meet people on the streets, in bars, parties, basically any place where I could have a conversation. I’ve never tried OLD. I also have a cousin who’s friends with a LOT of people and every time I hang out with him i inevitably meet some of them.

 

I think the best way to meet new people is to spend time with your most social friend who can introduce you to potential dates. I prefer this over trying to meet people at classes or the gym. There’s always an element of awkwardness if you get rejected at a class and god forbid if you get rejected twice, you’ll get labelled all kinds of nasty things.

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Meeting the opposite sex is easy because the attraction (and need) will bring people together. Meeting new people for friendship (same sex) is more difficult because it takes more effort.

 

When you move and you don't have any friends in a new city, you can start with people at work, neighbors, join a volunteer group etc. Then you have to invite people to do things, organize a party, etc. And they may flake on you.

 

By comparison, dating is so much easier. Woman sits at a bar and some man always comes up to talk to her. You go online, click around, and you have someone to have coffee with. But easy come, easy go.

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I meet people online exclusively these days. I don't know what else to do on a budget. But if I left the house more I would probably not be single because when I do get asked out, it's completely by chance during the most unlikely moments.. such as when I'm out doing errands with no make up on and wearing baggy sweat pants. Weird. Unfortunately, they're never anyone I'm interested in.

 

It is my dream to have someone offer to fix me up, but no one ever has... and when I have asked my friends to do so if they know anyone who is single, they usually clam up and act like I never said anything. An oddity I can't figure out which bothers me sometimes. But I digress...

 

Loneliness is an epidemic... there are people everywhere but meeting the right person at the right time is the trick.

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Technically speaking, I've met people through in all kinds of situations. It really depends on you being open to meeting them.

 

Classes? Clubs? Family / Friends BBQ's.

 

I know that sounds kind of weird, but in the end, you just have to be around people. I've heard stories of women dating their taxi drivers.

 

You never know when you'll cross paths with someone. The trick is to be open to it I guess.

 

Exactly this. I've met women that I've at least traded numbers with everywhere - from a restaurant to a hospital waiting room. Just be open and if someone catches your eye, no matter where it is, strike up a conversation and see what happens.

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lt always surprises me that nearly everyone in forums seem to do gym and l would've thought gyms would be a great place to meet people but no one ever seems too, weird.

Another weird thing is l've know a few of those friends people know dozens of people , always have someone around, but they've usually been single. dunno how that wokrs.

 

In younger days l always found parties were the best of the best and l love to party too so it was a win win.

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Mainly through online, though not dating sites. Forums related to hobbies etc. But I have also met a fair amount of people at concerts and festivals, as well as through work/university or other friends.

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Work, friends and their extended circle of friends. A recent and not so subtle introduction through a co-worker I hardly knew comes to mind. Very sweet, but unfortunately a few months too late.

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mortensorchid

The problem is that I NEVER EVER meet anyone unless it's through an online source. And they are ookie to begin with.

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House parties, free concerts, bar where bands are playing.

then there is the oddball grocery shopping or places I take my kids to have fun.

usually there is one or two women i catch looking at me.

At which point i meet their stare and wait until they look away then just approach and introduce myself.

I mean they were looking for a reason and i'm too old to care about rejection.

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MajesticUnicorn

Bars, OLD, and the ski lift.

 

Yet I have horrible luck with dating and always end up with the super hot jerk type so I clearly need to switch it up or stop going for the same type of dudes.

 

The guys I’ve met through people are generally better, but yeah that can be hard to come by.

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FWIW.. I never met a real person via online. I usually meet people at get together's and parties. It also helps if you loosen up and drink (not too much, but enough to drop your guard down a bit) and you can start talking BS and next thing you know, you have a shared interest. You kind of have to be at a place where you can actually talk and have a conversion. Places like loud bars and concerts -- it's a little harder.

 

You can also meet people in various night school programs and so on. But you can't just go there and no talk to anyone. You sort of need to make an effort to be a little out going even if you are not.

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It's been a long time since I met anyone online. I think maybe 2010 or therabouts, around the time we got divorced.

 

Since then, any chance meetings have occurred through voluntary social activities and not through friends or family, like vacations I've gone on or travels to and from meeting friends, or going to cruises or car shows with one of my cars, to volunteer work to, most recently, running into a lady who just mesmerized me getting tacos at the local vets hall with my best friend's wife. Nothing planned. Just happened. I don't live in the area anymore so nothing came of it but it did make my list of meetings. I made small talk with a few ladies at a restaurant when dining with best friend's daughter and her H before Xmas. Showed up, bla, bla, again don't live there anymore but it's fun and could've gone somewhere otherwise.

 

Essentially, get out and socialize and be oneself and stuff happens. I'm no Brad Pitt room stopper, mostly invisible in life so yeah one has to open one's mouth or otherwise get attention of fellow humans. It takes action. Good luck!

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I've met like 50+ people online and smashed most of them, but have no game when it comes to a cold approach IRL

 

OLD sites have a reputation for attracting certain types of people. Anti socials, peeps looking for sex hookups, e.t.c. and then people complain about them. There is nothing more contradictory than two anti social people meeting up socially in public.

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  • 3 weeks later...
lt always surprises me that nearly everyone in forums seem to do gym and l would've thought gyms would be a great place to meet people but no one ever seems too, weird.

Another weird thing is l've know a few of those friends people know dozens of people , always have someone around, but they've usually been single. dunno how that wokrs.

 

In younger days l always found parties were the best of the best and l love to party too so it was a win win.

 

I go to the gym, but I have a strict no dating at the gym policy. Also, I usually go early when it's almost empty.

 

 

Where to meet people? Classes are a good start. Most of the classes I take are female dominated.

 

I've met a couple guys while walking the beach. I met one at a car wash. Supermarkets are easy places to meet people. The less I want to date, The more guys try to holla *shrug&

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You just have to get out of the house. Like yesterday, as old as I am, a guy started talking to me and helping me at Lowe's. He seemed like he wanted a friends and I would have encouraged that except he was doom and gloom, the second person this week to tell me they think the world is ending soon. Ain't no one got time for that.

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Here's a list of places where I/friends have met significants others/partners/husbands;

 

Work (I wouldn't recommend this personally, but it works for some :))

Scottish dancing classes

Church

Work conferences/seminars

University/college (both as young people and "mature" students)

Public library

Supermarket

Via friends and family

Political/campaigning groups

Hospital

Tennis club

Ballroom dancing classes (good for guys as they are always short of men to partner the ladies)

Dentist's waiting room

Queue for a bus/coach

Train/tube/metro (usually only works if you catch the same train regularly for work and sit in the same seat -what we call in UK 'season ticket holder')

Charity work

Walking the dog in the park/on the beach

 

and of course the ubiquitous OLD :)

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The problem is that I NEVER EVER meet anyone unless it's through an online source. And they are ookie to begin with.

 

Sounds like you should put the phone down, find some hobbies, and go from there.

 

It's not that difficult to meet people in real life

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Sounds like you should put the phone down, find some hobbies, and go from there.

 

It's not that difficult to meet people in real life

 

Just cuz I'm a little annoyed - how old are you? For me, it WAS 'not that difficult to meet people in real life' 40 years ago before I was first married. Now (and the community I live in is a significant 'variable'), I am finding it just about impossible - unless you think it's appropriate for a 60-something to ask a 16 y/o he meets at a dance class (literally happened a couple of weeks ago - and, NO - I did NOT ask her out) if she wants to 'go out'. Geez, people, understand that there are circumstances where what works for you, doesn't work for others!

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