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Hi,

The other day at my newish job was a nightmare, this experience was shared with a male co-worker. One who I do admit is very handsome. We both had a very stressful day; he was waiting for me beyond his working time to wait for me and check that I was alright. He gave me a hug and squeeze when he could see I was a little stressed. I am fine with hugs/touch at the workplace (when the time/situation is right) but just wondering if that is the norm for most. Afterwards we walked out of the office and stood chatting for a good 10 mins or more even though he had lots going on that eve. We were mostly chatting about ourselves/lives outside of work. He seemed to enjoy chatting to me even though he had places/things to get to. Also once he gave me some praise and told me that he told the manager about my progress. Also he has helped me out a bit last week. Maybe I am reading a little bit much into it but does it sound like he may be interested?

 

It is not a big deal either way, I am just curious as to other people’s interpretations really.

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Hugs in the workplace have not been normal anyplace I've worked, and I've worked at some pretty casual places. I mean, if your dog died or something like that, maybe, but not for doing your job, no. He's probably into you.

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  • 1 month later...
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Thanks for responding.

 

Just an update. I'm noticing that he always finds a way to come and talk to me. Sometime it is because he needs to tell me something work-related and other times it is not necessary at all. When I came back to work after the weekend, he came over and talked to me and noticed that I changed my hair. No compliments. He teased me instead (nothing nasty, just joking), and then went to playfully pinch my arm. Maybe he is just being friendly tho and he is possibly a touchy feely person.

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It's going to be up to you to set the boundaries here. What worries me most is he's trying to get some mileage with you by telling you he's talking you up at work, which means that at some point if he requires payment and you don't pay up, he will be a Bitter Billy.

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Hi there, thanks for replying again. What do you mean by getting mileage?

 

My thoughts on it are that it is probably that he is a friendly and naturally flirty guy and doesn't realize that he may be giving off unintended signals. I am not bothered by it as I like and enjoy his company! Just wanted an outsider's perspective on things.

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Maybe I do? Probably because he has been helpful. But no, I am being more rational lately. I've noticed a change in my mindset as I'm zoning in more on just getting on with my job.

 

If I'm to get "deep", it is probable that I am wanting a self-esteem/ego boost and that is why I have obviously been reading too much into these interactions.

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Hi there, thanks for replying again. What do you mean by getting mileage?

 

My thoughts on it are that it is probably that he is a friendly and naturally flirty guy and doesn't realize that he may be giving off unintended signals. I am not bothered by it as I like and enjoy his company! Just wanted an outsider's perspective on things.

 

I mean that he is saying he's going to help you at work and he may eventually expect something for it and if he doesn't get it, he may retaliate.

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stillafool

It would seem if you are both single and he is interested he would ask you out. Wait until that happens before you start crushing too much on this guy. That will be the sure way to tell if he has a romantic interest in you. Some guys just flirt at work to pass the day.

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It would seem if you are both single and he is interested he would ask you out. Wait until that happens before you start crushing too much on this guy. That will be the sure way to tell if he has a romantic interest in you. Some guys just flirt at work to pass the day.

 

The thing is, we are both attached to other people. Yeah, he probably is just finding a way to pass the day...he's quite easy-going and humorous so it wouldn't surprise me if being flirty is second nature to him. Me, personally, I am not a flirty person at all! Even with my husband and him likewise. I got to just focus on my other half....he is already too good for me and I am incredibly blessed to be married to him, despite our problems.

 

I didn't go and see the work guy today, I'm just going to carry on with my job as normal. He is usually the one to say hello anyway. I did see him briefly today but only cause he said hi to me from across the room.

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I mean that he is saying he's going to help you at work and he may eventually expect something for it and if he doesn't get it, he may retaliate.

 

Nah, I don't think that he is like that. He seems to be a nice guy who genuinely likes helping others.

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Nah, I don't think that he is like that. He seems to be a nice guy who genuinely likes helping others.

 

So it sounds like you know him well enough now to know he's just helpful and maybe it's not flirting.

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