KubeDawg Posted November 8, 2004 Share Posted November 8, 2004 Alright, well, I'm new to these forums. Hi, my name is C., I'm 19 years old, Male, and I've never had a relationship with the opposite sex other than just friends. First Kiss: yet to happen Dates I've been on: 1 Been turned down: 1 Height: 6' 7" Weight 350-400lbs I am wanting to get to know a person named CL., whom I work with at a call center. I can talk to her fine, but I cannot keep eye contact for very long, and I want to ask her out but I'm not sure how. I'm extremely dissappointed in myself for not asking her tonight after I got off work. She just walked right past, and said good night, as did I. I dont know whether it's just my confidence, or that I think things through too much... I tend to do that a lot... I think of both good and bad what could come of a few words that literally could change my life. Maybe I'm scared, maybe I'm confused. I've got no clue. After I think about not asking her out, I say to myself, life is too short, and I think I start to build confidence but then, all that confidence leaves me when I try asking. What is wrong with me? Link to post Share on other sites
DJ_Dork Posted November 8, 2004 Share Posted November 8, 2004 You're doing okay. Link to post Share on other sites
greenlove Posted November 8, 2004 Share Posted November 8, 2004 Nothing is wrong with you..quit worrying so much is all I was 19 when I had my first boyfriend if it makes you feel any better. You'll learn that rejection sucks, but it an't the end of the world. So live a little and take a chance. Link to post Share on other sites
greenlove Posted November 8, 2004 Share Posted November 8, 2004 Nothing is wrong with you...quit worrying so much is all I was 19 when I had my first boyfriend if it makes you feel any better. You'll learn that rejection sucks, but it an't the end of the world. So live a little and take a chance. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueLP Posted November 8, 2004 Share Posted November 8, 2004 Hang in there bro. We all have our own self-doubts we go through. Just remember that you don't want to be with the girls who reject you. And it doesn't have to affect you unless you let it. They are the ones missing out, right? The girl that you want is one who likes you for you (and you're in luck, because you're the only one who can really act like your self). So keep trying, and put a positive spin on the situation, because you have nothing to lose. Link to post Share on other sites
Author KubeDawg Posted November 8, 2004 Author Share Posted November 8, 2004 BlueLP, your post is absolutely correct. and tomorrow, if I do see CL, I will ask her out, if she doesn't want to, fine, she doesn't know what she's missing. ty very much. just needed the right answers to set me straight Link to post Share on other sites
RetroMan Posted November 9, 2004 Share Posted November 9, 2004 Hello. Never posted here yet, just been a lurker...but I thought I'd just say, to make you feel even better, that I am 21 and am still waiting for my first girlfriend, first kiss, the lot. Bit sad I know. It's frustrating having to wait but I'm in no doubt I will get there in the end. It'll just make it all the better for waiting. So, just remember, you're still two years in credit when compared to me! Link to post Share on other sites
Author KubeDawg Posted November 9, 2004 Author Share Posted November 9, 2004 Well, I'm in a bind. I have no ****ing clue what to do. I know what to do it's just the execution part thats killing me............... I work with her, were both same level, basically like assistant managers. I see her maybe 3 or 4 days out of the week, and in that time, I cannot do my job, because I think of her, and out of that time, where I don't see her, my job gets worse cause I can't stop thinking about her. To tell you how out of whack this has been, I didn't even realize it was November till yesterday....... I talk to her as much as I can mainly about work related stuff, but when it comes to small talk I suck. I cannot keep a conversation going it seems, and I think about the worst case scenarios if I were to ask for her # or ask her out....... I think waaaay to much and it's eating me alive......................... Putting what will happen, when that time comes, aside, what should I ask her? Would you like to go out with me some time? Sounds kinda vague to me...... A lot of ppl ask me, is she interested in you. I don't know. Women have extremely mixed signals........ I think she does like me. I think too far ahead........ hats my biggest problem...... i think, what to wear, how the night will end, things like that.. gah. im tired. ima sleep this off. hopefully my mind will be at ease when i wake. **** where should this take place? in front of everyone and their 2nd cousin? or outside at break or lunch? basically i walk around and answer hands or take supervisor calls and deal with ****ty customers. so what if i just started walking, and walked right past a few ppl holdin their hands up that got a question and just went up to her and tell her i like her, and that we should go out some time? gnite... enough using my brain for one day.................................... Link to post Share on other sites
Devildog Posted November 9, 2004 Share Posted November 9, 2004 What do you have to lose by asking her out? If you don't ask her out today, will you be dating her tomorrow? No. If you ask her out today and she says no, will you be dating her tomorrow? No. If you ask her out today and she says yes.......... Your life can only stay the same or get better if you ask her out. Link to post Share on other sites
Flying Goose Posted November 12, 2004 Share Posted November 12, 2004 Originally posted by Devildog What do you have to lose by asking her out? If you don't ask her out today, will you be dating her tomorrow? No. If you ask her out today and she says no, will you be dating her tomorrow? No. If you ask her out today and she says yes.......... Your life can only stay the same or get better if you ask her out. That's pretty true - as long as you don't take things too seriously to start off with. Works best for when you don't know the person and it's mostly a physical attraction. Anything else and your mind is likely to screw you over in the unfortunate event she says no. Link to post Share on other sites
Author KubeDawg Posted December 18, 2004 Author Share Posted December 18, 2004 Well, she has a boyfriend. Now what? Link to post Share on other sites
soccorsilly Posted December 18, 2004 Share Posted December 18, 2004 Back off. SHe knows you are interested and if things change on her end, I am sure she will come a looking for you. As for dealing with rejection--this is NOT rejection. And even if it were, so what. Remember that the best baseball player in the world misses more than he hits, so swing again! Link to post Share on other sites
Author KubeDawg Posted December 19, 2004 Author Share Posted December 19, 2004 ok thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
ice_solid_2k4 Posted December 19, 2004 Share Posted December 19, 2004 ahhaha u think ur stats sucks....look at mine i'm 18...asked a girl out once First Kiss: nope Dates I've been on: 0 Been turned down: 1....i was stood up Height: 5' 5" Weight 130-140lbs crushes- too many Link to post Share on other sites
Angelus666 Posted December 27, 2004 Share Posted December 27, 2004 Hey KubeDawg, dont feel down, there are soo many other girls out there for you. I mean, you are young, only 19, maybe still in collage, and you work. There have got to be other women in your life other than this one. Have you tried hitting a few bars or nightclubs? Try calling up a few high school buddies and throwing a huge party at your place? Just a guys thoughts. Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted December 27, 2004 Share Posted December 27, 2004 >>> I cannot do my job, because I think of her<<< Kube, Stop focusing so much attention on women - that's a big mistake that a lot of us make when we're starting out. We end up placing such a high priority on women (i.e. thinking about them during the day) that they get inside our heads, and that's just not a good situation. Moreover, a woman can pick up on the subtle signs of insecurity, which will sink any interest she may have in you. Guys who have success with women usually have a strong approach to life. They work out regularly. They may not always have the highest paying job, but they take pride in their work and do their best. They may not have the drive to rule the world, but they have inner drive and curiosity to seek out new challenges and experiences in life. They like to hang out and have good times with good, clean people. In other words, they're strong, stable and...interesting. It all starts from within. Build your inner self...and the women will come. Link to post Share on other sites
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