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Is it worth going after this girl....?


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To keep my title short I'll finish the question here.

 

There's a girl at my college who I'm really interested in getting to know better. Possibly... relationship eventually? But anyways, we share many mutuals on Facebook so I decided to look her up too see what she was all about.

 

I'm more than positive that she is single, but she used to date a guy who looks to be the complete opposite of me. Hunts, chews tobacco, real country, you know; southern stuff.

 

I used to live in Atlanta so I've never indulged in that lifestyle. You see where I'm getting at.

 

So what I'm wondering is, is it even worth going after this girl I'm interested in, even though I'm the opposite of the guys she dated in the past?

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She dated a guy who was the complete opposite of you, and she's no longer dating him. Isn't it entirely possible that they broke up because she wanted a guy who was the complete opposite of him? Like you?

 

Why wouldn't you go for it? The very worst thing that could happen would be that she rejects you. Just do it.

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She dated a guy who was the complete opposite of you, and she's no longer dating him. Isn't it entirely possible that they broke up because she wanted a guy who was the complete opposite of him? Like you?

 

Why wouldn't you go for it? The very worst thing that could happen would be that she rejects you. Just do it.

 

Wow. Good point Kali. I guess I'm just either nervous of living up to the "image" of the guys she's dated... or I simply don't want to be turned down BECAUSE of my different lifestyle. Either way I'm gonna go for it.

 

Now if you don't mind me asking this. How can I go about this?

 

I don't want to come on strong, but I want her aware that I'm interested in her. At the same time I don't wan a play it too safe where it lands me in the friends zone.

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Wine helps me make good points. ;)

 

How do you usually approach women?

 

- I typically would ask if they'd like to just meet up sometime for coffee or whatever, but with every relationship I've ever gotten into is because I had close social circles with the girls I've dated. So I didn't have to do much work to prove who I was because, *insert name* would have done a lot of research on me by asking around.

 

- This is probably the first instance where the girls knows nothing about me. I say we have mutual friends, but that differently holds no weight in my current situation. So know i'm trying to put myself out there.

 

Have you spoken to her before?

 

- Thankfully yes. We exchanged a FEW words in our library. Luckily I have two classes with her, but didn't talk because I guess first week of school is nerve wracking.

 

- We we walking out of class to our cars. I was behind her and called out her name. I ended up walking with her for a minute or two and just talked about her major and where she want for HS. Then thats it... nothing impactful.

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todreaminblue

my rule of thumb is to not judge people by who they went out with in the past ...i am not those women....i am me....so if we get on we get on regardless of who he dated.....my ex dated gorgeous women wealthy well to do ....society types..tall blonde impeccably groomed.....me i was just up from a street urchin and not materialistic at all.....the women he dated he never had a serious relationship with i was his first...... they were pretty cold ....i am not cold...i pride myself on that...i am now an ex street urchin who has the room to take in street urchins........smilin....now my ex also does things for homeless people...doesnt smoke doesnt drink doesnt party doesnt do drugs.... and is a real homebody..... i would like to believe our relationship helped him become a better person.....i really think it did.he has changed and its all good...........but just not together.....as with all my exes i am their friend just not right for me.....they were just not right for me....

 

 

 

be you and realize they are her exes for a reason......good luck.....ask her...you wont know unless you try....deb

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be you and realize they are her exes for a reason......good luck.....ask her...you wont know unless you try....deb

 

You're right. I'd hate for a girl to misjudge me based on the people I've dated in the past.

 

I broke up with, whomever, BECAUSE they weren't a fit.

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That's what college is for, getting out of your environment and meeting a wider variety of people and expanding your tastes and horizons. Most people change radically during these years and begin evolving into their own person instead of the person their parents raised. It can't hurt to talk to her and ask her out. Good luck!

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