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anyone else put off by the opposite sex?


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now i dont mean hating or gender wars.

 

i mean the attitude which they have towards dating. i have completely lost interest in men. i make no association with them to romance. i still find them attractive, but just feel very cold towards them. i have no problem with friendship, talking to them, being civil, so on...

 

but just dont ever see myself with one. i know you all going to say your generalising, but honestly every guy i have come across, (around my own age) has the same attitude towards love, relationships, marriage, dating, everything.

 

and for a while i used really worry about not finding anyone, but now a days it like i dont really care. such kind feels bad because i used really want to fall in love, get married, children one day, but now i just feel empty.

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I go through those moods every now and then. I'm in one right now where I couldn't care less about women. I can definitely take them or leave them right now.

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I go through those moods every now and then. I'm in one right now where I couldn't care less about women. I can definitely take them or leave them right now.

 

I'm kind of in a similar funk. I'm dating this gorgeous woman now, but I seem a little more detached about the whole dating thing in general. Trying to figure the ladies out can be so exhausting...:p

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Caius Ballad
I go through those moods every now and then. I'm in one right now where I couldn't care less about women. I can definitely take them or leave them right now.

 

Men built society, technology and everything else.

 

Women don't even respect or care for it.

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No I love men. I have great male friends, I'm on good terms with my exes, I love spending time with them, having a laugh, a drink, just muck about. Love training with them and listen to their silly banter.

 

I only date the ones where we have some kind of mutual connection from the start though, don't do it as a sport. I also got out of OLD very quickly when I realised how dehumanising (for me) it could be.

 

I love guys, I think they are great.

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Of course. This is part of the reason why I am a lesbian. In my own personal experience, girls just get me more. And vice versa.

 

What's funny is that my best friends are two guys, but they are a rare breed in that their views on dating are well beyond their years and align very closely to what most women want in a man.

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now i dont mean hating or gender wars.

 

i mean the attitude which they have towards dating. i have completely lost interest in men. i make no association with them to romance. i still find them attractive, but just feel very cold towards them. i have no problem with friendship, talking to them, being civil, so on...

 

but just dont ever see myself with one. i know you all going to say your generalising, but honestly every guy i have come across, (around my own age) has the same attitude towards love, relationships, marriage, dating, everything.

 

and for a while i used really worry about not finding anyone, but now a days it like i dont really care. such kind feels bad because i used really want to fall in love, get married, children one day, but now i just feel empty.

 

I try to pay attention to the guys with better attitudes, but I, too, have really removed myself from the idea of actually dating anyone, let alone getting married. It makes me sad, because I've experienced so little in that way, and I feel like my time is gone now. With the better guys, I just can't see them dating me. (don't ask me why; to quote something I read last year, "I don't have issues, I have subscriptions.")

 

I'm trying to improve my attitude, because it has been the worst it's ever been over the past couple of years. I hardly ever feel happy, I'm not getting anything accomplished, I'm stuck and don't see myself breaking out of that anymore. I wanted a healthy relationship so badly, but now I'm worried about everything.

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Caius Ballad
No I love men. I have great male friends, I'm on good terms with my exes, I love spending time with them, having a laugh, a drink, just muck about. Love training with them and listen to their silly banter.

 

I only date the ones where we have some kind of mutual connection from the start though, don't do it as a sport. I also got out of OLD very quickly when I realised how dehumanising (for me) it could be.

 

I love guys, I think they are great.

 

Men and women can't be friends. Most likely your males friends think you're hot so they put up with female topics that have no interest to men at all. They believe they have a 5% chance with you.

 

NO guy befriends women they find unbangable thus you my dear must be HOT to them.

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but honestly every guy i have come across, (around my own age) has the same attitude towards love, relationships, marriage, dating, everything.

 

That's really odd because I can't anything everyone thinks the same way about and I'm not really looking. People don't even have the same attitude about entertainment so I find it really really hard to believe all the guys in the age group you are interested in agree on love, relationships, marriage, dating and everything.

 

You seem to be operating from a fatalistic stance. Like exaggeration, too much of it and people stop taking you seriously. Maybe this is what is hamstringing you?

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Mindset can make a huge difference. In terms of approaching situations as well as perceiving compatibility. Are your beliefs and convictions out of the ordinary compared to those around you?

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Feelsgoodman
now i dont mean hating or gender wars.

 

i mean the attitude which they have towards dating. i have completely lost interest in men. i make no association with them to romance. i still find them attractive, but just feel very cold towards them. i have no problem with friendship, talking to them, being civil, so on...

 

but just dont ever see myself with one. i know you all going to say your generalising, but honestly every guy i have come across, (around my own age) has the same attitude towards love, relationships, marriage, dating, everything.

 

and for a while i used really worry about not finding anyone, but now a days it like i dont really care. such kind feels bad because i used really want to fall in love, get married, children one day, but now i just feel empty.

It's typical to feel that way if you think (rightly or wrongly) that you are not wanted by the opposite sex. It's called being bitter.

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Feelsgoodman

What's funny is that my best friends are two guys, but they are a rare breed in that their views on dating are well beyond their years and align very closely to what most women want in a man.

As a lesbian, how would you know what most women want in a man? :D

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now i dont mean hating or gender wars.

 

i mean the attitude which they have towards dating. i have completely lost interest in men. i make no association with them to romance. i still find them attractive, but just feel very cold towards them. i have no problem with friendship, talking to them, being civil, so on...

 

but just dont ever see myself with one. i know you all going to say your generalising, but honestly every guy i have come across, (around my own age) has the same attitude towards love, relationships, marriage, dating, everything.

 

and for a while i used really worry about not finding anyone, but now a days it like i dont really care. such kind feels bad because i used really want to fall in love, get married, children one day, but now i just feel empty.

 

I hate to say it but you should probably go for foreign men and stop dating American men if you have so far. My dating/sex experience with foreign men although limited has been so much better. They just love women more, specially in some Latin and European cultures. A lot of North American men just see women as a combination of sexual body parts. Expecting romance from them is like expecting calculus formulas from a monkey.

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It's typical to feel that way if you think (rightly or wrongly) that you are not wanted by the opposite sex. It's called being bitter.

 

i wish there was simple explanation to how i feel, but bitter isnt one of them, i actually get tons of attention from guys, but these days ive done everything i can to avoid it, i dont go out anymore, not to social settings anyway, no longer wear make-up, do my hair, wear granny clothes to avoid cat calls in the streets.

 

i just feel so disinterested, its weird, i cant explain it it definitely not hatred, just lack of excitement, sort of like being jaded out which is strange because im quite in-experienced.

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Feelsgoodman
i wish there was simple explanation to how i feel, but bitter isnt one of them, i actually get tons of attention from guys, but these days ive done everything i can to avoid it, i dont go out anymore, not to social settings anyway, no longer wear make-up, do my hair, wear granny clothes to avoid cat calls in the streets.

 

i just feel so disinterested, its weird, i cant explain it it definitely not hatred, just lack of excitement, sort of like being jaded out which is strange because im quite in-experienced.

Maybe you're just depressed? It's not unusual for people suffering from depression to lose interest in dating.

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Negative Nancy
i mean the attitude which they have towards dating. i have completely lost interest in men. i make no association with them to romance. i still find them attractive, but just feel very cold towards them. i have no problem with friendship, talking to them, being civil, so on...

 

but just dont ever see myself with one. i know you all going to say your generalising, but honestly every guy i have come across, (around my own age) has the same attitude towards love, relationships, marriage, dating, everything.

 

and for a while i used really worry about not finding anyone, but now a days it like i dont really care. such kind feels bad because i used really want to fall in love, get married, children one day, but now i just feel empty.

 

men just see women as a combination of sexual body parts. Expecting romance from them is like expecting calculus formulas from a monkey.

 

 

i completely agree with this and feel the exact same way (who would have thought? :rolleyes:)

 

i think all men will cheat sooner or later; they are just too hardwired having sex with many different women and it's just too important to them. in fact, i sometimes think it's the ONLY thing that's important to them, which already is reflected in the way they see things: they constantly talk about women's bodies and judge and rate them on those "traits" alone. you find threads here such as "my girlfriend has gained weight, how can i make her look hot and sexy again", not: "my girlfriend is so stupid, how can i make her more of a pleasure to be around" (because men don't care about personality as long as the exterior is "hot" :rolleyes:).

 

when men are out in the streets with their women, they don't enjoy taking in their own partner's sight but would rather seek out, stare at and drool over other women, making their women feel completely interchangeable.

 

when a woman is pregnant, men care less about being thrilled at the fact that their woman is carrying THEIR child, but care more about the "nasty" :rolleyes: effects pregnancy has on the woman's body. that is like belittling a man who returns from war with tons of scars and wounds, i would like to see the men's reaction if their women commented on that with "ewww, you should get plastic surgery for those scars". :rolleyes:

 

men are just shallow and sacrificing your life (literally) for one sometimes just doesn't seem worth it at all when all you can look forward to in the future is being traded in for a younger model as soon as you hit a certain age and have "done your duty". i can already predict some answers here, that with my attitude i won't run into the risk of ever experiencing that anyway :rolleyes: but in the long run it's probably for the better anyway.

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StillReigning
i completely agree with this and feel the exact same way (who would have thought? :rolleyes:)

 

i think all men will cheat sooner or later;

 

 

Really? Where is your evidence?

 

 

you find threads here such as "my girlfriend has gained weight, how can i make her look hot and sexy again", not: "my girlfriend is so stupid, how can i make her more of a pleasure to be around" (because men don't care about personality as long as the exterior is "hot" :rolleyes:).

 

 

How many polls on male dominated sites do you want me to show you where men say personality is just as important as looks for dating?

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mitch conner

I use to blame women for this but I really think it's just me now nowadays. Becuase most of my friends are married and in a healthy relationship. My issue I attract women already in a relationship, looking for someone to take the place of their current partner. This is like meeting the exact same person just in another body. Having been on the other side of it, I run as fast as I can in those situations. If you ever find a solution let me know. Just had 2 more of these in like 2 weeks. Spent more than ten years avoiding the dating scene because of this, and I'm surviving all alone, but I know I could be happier in the right relationship. So I'm looking for reasoning behind the issue, you should do the same.

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i completely agree with this and feel the exact same way (who would have thought? :rolleyes:)

 

i think all men will cheat sooner or later; they are just too hardwired having sex with many different women and it's just too important to them. in fact, i sometimes think it's the ONLY thing that's important to them, which already is reflected in the way they see things: they constantly talk about women's bodies and judge and rate them on those "traits" alone. you find threads here such as "my girlfriend has gained weight, how can i make her look hot and sexy again", not: "my girlfriend is so stupid, how can i make her more of a pleasure to be around" (because men don't care about personality as long as the exterior is "hot" :rolleyes:).

 

when men are out in the streets with their women, they don't enjoy taking in their own partner's sight but would rather seek out, stare at and drool over other women, making their women feel completely interchangeable.

 

when a woman is pregnant, men care less about being thrilled at the fact that their woman is carrying THEIR child, but care more about the "nasty" :rolleyes: effects pregnancy has on the woman's body. that is like belittling a man who returns from war with tons of scars and wounds, i would like to see the men's reaction if their women commented on that with "ewww, you should get plastic surgery for those scars". :rolleyes:

 

men are just shallow and sacrificing your life (literally) for one sometimes just doesn't seem worth it at all when all you can look forward to in the future is being traded in for a younger model as soon as you hit a certain age and have "done your duty". i can already predict some answers here, that with my attitude i won't run into the risk of ever experiencing that anyway :rolleyes: but in the long run it's probably for the better anyway.

 

as negative as your post is their some truth to, i kinda feel stupid, for how i used to think id find love get married, have babies. now it seems pointless, id rather direct my efforts and energy towards building a good career and if i ever want children ill just adopt, or have it alone, men are just not worth it. all they care about is their d***s, and t*ts.

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i completely agree with this and feel the exact same way (who would have thought? :rolleyes:)

 

i think all men will cheat sooner or later; they are just too hardwired having sex with many different women and it's just too important to them. in fact, i sometimes think it's the ONLY thing that's important to them, which already is reflected in the way they see things: they constantly talk about women's bodies and judge and rate them on those "traits" alone. you find threads here such as "my girlfriend has gained weight, how can i make her look hot and sexy again", not: "my girlfriend is so stupid, how can i make her more of a pleasure to be around" (because men don't care about personality as long as the exterior is "hot" :rolleyes:).

 

when men are out in the streets with their women, they don't enjoy taking in their own partner's sight but would rather seek out, stare at and drool over other women, making their women feel completely interchangeable.

 

when a woman is pregnant, men care less about being thrilled at the fact that their woman is carrying THEIR child, but care more about the "nasty" :rolleyes: effects pregnancy has on the woman's body. that is like belittling a man who returns from war with tons of scars and wounds, i would like to see the men's reaction if their women commented on that with "ewww, you should get plastic surgery for those scars". :rolleyes:

 

There are a lot of men who are complete tools who act like that, no lie, they sometimes make me lose faith in the male sex. But that is way too much of a negative generalisation. Of course not all men cheat, or drool over other women in front of their partners, or have completely selfish desires.

 

men are just shallow and sacrificing your life (literally) for one sometimes just doesn't seem worth it at all when all you can look forward to in the future is being traded in for a younger model as soon as you hit a certain age and have "done your duty". i can already predict some answers here, that with my attitude i won't run into the risk of ever experiencing that anyway :rolleyes: but in the long run it's probably for the better anyway.

 

This statement seems to assume that most men can actually get a younger model which is not true. Men age and become less attractive as they hit middle age just like women do. Very few men will end up looking like George Clooney.

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Negative Nancy
as negative as your post is their some truth to, i kinda feel stupid, for how i used to think id find love get married, have babies. now it seems pointless, id rather direct my efforts and energy towards building a good career and if i ever want children ill just adopt, or have it alone, men are just not worth it. all they care about is their d***s, and t*ts.

 

I agree with the last sentence, not so much with the conclusion before that, though, as I find working on a "career" neither satisfying nor appealing, but it seems going down the family route is very risky with how fickle men are today. I've heard many of a story about how women stick to their men loyally for many years, raise their kids only to be kicked out for someone younger at a certain age, or getting cheated on. It's really terrifying, and just not worth it. That's why finding someone who is a 100% into you and not just "settled" because he couldn't get what he really wanted is vital and crucial for even giving it a shot in my opinion, but good luck finding that today; most men like you said only care about a very specific type of woman.

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Negative Nancy
This statement seems to assume that most men can actually get a younger model which is not true. Men age and become less attractive as they hit middle age just like women do. Very few men will end up looking like George Clooney.

 

That doesn't mean that they wouldn't want it or worse, would pass up the opportunity if it came up. Which, in my book, is just as bad.

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