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Opening up to him.....


longlegzs80

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Okay, with this new guy I find it very very hard to open up to him and be affectionate. I get extremely shy and figidy whenever I am around him and he tells me I need to relax for 5 minutes and just be myself. The thing is I am being myself but he is having a really hard time as to why when he trys to kiss me I pull away.

 

This all comes to the fact of not having a father and not knowing how to love a man. And it affects me and it has already affecting this new relationship that I am in. I told the guy I am not affectionate but he is the type to be very affectionate, and yes I like him holding me, but that is all I can do. What's my deal? He is very sweet to me, and seems to care alot. I don't know why the showing affection is so hard, and I find it so hard to explain.

 

I am really lost for words.

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You have got to find a way, he is only gonna try so hard then give up, think of the little mermaid song "kiss the gir" just switch to kiss the boy,lol

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DARKANGELISM: I totally know what your saying. I don't want him to run away and I do care about him. This is all kinda strange to admit, but I have some attraction to him which I wish I could express. But it is so hard for me to be affectionate. I find it so hard and people just don;t seem to understand that.

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Originally posted by longlegzs80

But it is so hard for me to be affectionate. I find it so hard and people just don;t seem to understand that.

 

You don't need to see a shrink. You're not an affectionate person, and it's impossible to be in a healthy relationship if you're pretending to be something that you are not.

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See, I agree with DRyermaker, because I just can't seem to be affectionate and I have seen people like myself who are not affectionate but still together. And I have said flat out that I am not affectionate. I am just not that kind of person. I love the hugging, and cuddling, but that is it. And if it comes to getting sex, just give it to me and that is it.

 

So, I don't know what to tell him. I don't talk much to him so he is trying to figure me out because I can't seem to express myself, and the only way I can express myself is not on the phone, but only in email. I don't know whats wrong with me. I can't help it at all that I am not that kind of person. Its obvious he can't handle it after our little episode last night.

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There's nothing wrong with you, there's nothing wrong with him, it's just possible that you're wrong for each other.

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Of course you agree with him,nobody would ever admit im right,(im not saying i am)but my opinion is the same.

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hmm playing hard to get..ehehe i dig that longlegz!!

 

once you're comfortable around him, things will happen naturally. when you're ready it'll happen.

you dont have to force yourself if you're not ready. you should also tell him to take things slow, and not to rush you.

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