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I feel pressured to move towards marriage at 21?


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Old 22nd January 2018, 8:36 PM   #16
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My parents got married aged 19 and 20, and they're still together and happy 51years later, so it can last. That said with the problems you've been having in your relationship, it would be foolish to go there right now.


There is also a lot to gain from a long engagement, my husband and I were engaged for 5 years before we got married. So we were both fully aware of what we were getting into by the time we eventually tied the knot.
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Old 6th March 2018, 11:40 AM   #17
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I married at this age. I don't think it's too young if both people are mature and want it and aren't getting married under pressure (i.e. pregnant, broke, military, etc). Although we are divorced now, do I think we married too young? Not really. The problems we had would have been there despite our age. We are both still the same people and I'm pretty sure, if our meeting had been delayed 10 years, we still would have ended up married because we were that drawn to each other, and divorced because we were that incompatible in personality.
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Old 6th March 2018, 12:00 PM   #18
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Marriage is tough and it can not work out regardless of what age you get married. That said, I know a lot of people who married early, that ended up with some real issues, regretting what they might have missed out on. I got married at 26 and think that was perfect for me. I was able to have my fun in college and early professional years. And I was able to still have kids early enough that Iím not an old parent. Every situation is different, but I would advise my kids against getting married that young. I just think having more life experience as an adult is very important before making that commitment.
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Old 11th March 2018, 12:25 PM   #19
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What makes you think you need to get married after a year of dating?

That's ridiculous.

I will be dating my boyfriend for a year in May, and I definitely do not want to get married to him now. I am 31 and he is 38.
We probably will start talking about moving in together in a year or two.

Look -- you are young. You think life is all that at 21, you think you've 'arrived' somewhere. But you haven't.
This is just the beginning.
And your boyfriend??? Well, trust me, there will be about 3 more of them before you find the one you may want to get married to one day.

Enjoy the time you have. Don't pressure yourself or anyone else, don't let anyone pressure you.

This is not the time!
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Old 11th March 2018, 12:50 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sdraw108 View Post
You should clarify what you mean by this. Is it literally just a sudden "feeling" (i.e. in your own mind), or are you being pressured by your boyfriend, or some third party?
I agree. Who is pressuring you OP to get married at 21?
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Old 11th March 2018, 10:42 PM   #21
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Getting married young I don't think is the issue, but rather that your relationship doesn't seem stable or mature enough to handle the rocky ride that is marriage. I think you should really reconsider this idea.
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Old 14th March 2018, 8:53 AM   #22
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Double posting.
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