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Thicke2013

Okay folks, just looking for some ideas here. I have just purchased an engagement ring for my gf. She obviously knows that I am going to ask her to marry me as this isn't either of our first marriages and we have talked about marriage plenty. I do however want the actual day to be a surprise and I want it to be a romantic. I am a romantic at heart and want this to be something she will brag about and never forget. I have younger kids (16, 12, & 6) and I even thought about getting them involved. They love her and she them. I have a couple of ideas.

 

1-We live close to Nashville, TN and go a few times a year to visit. I thought about having her friends invite her on a "girls" only trip. She wouldn't know that I would secretly be there as well. I know a manager at a bar there and thought about organizing with him for one of "our" songs to be played by the band there that night and I could come out on stage and surprise her.

 

2-I wanted to buy her a dress and shoes, have them laying on the bed when she gets home from work one Friday night with a note simply telling her to get dressed and I'll pick her up at 7:00. I would show up in a rented limousine and take her to a fancy restaurant where we would have a romantic dinner. I don't want to ask at dinner because it is over done and not unique at all. From there we would go to a park where I would have wine, flowers, and candles set up. Also there would be a string from one tree to another with cards attached. The first card would be our first date and my feelings for her. The second would be our first kiss and so on until she reaches the last card which would say something like, "We have reached a turning point in our relationship where a very important decision has to be made." When she looks up I would be on one knee with the ring.

 

 

Okay, now your opinions or ideas. Go!!

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You might not want to put her on the spot in public.

 

Why not write with red lipstick on your bedroom mirror 'Try not to think of a horror when you read this. Will you be my wife ?'.

 

Or ... you could slip her note [in your handwriting], in her day to day routine, asking her to call a certain number, where you leave a message to be read 'Honey, i think it would be a pretty good idea to marry me.'

 

Or, if you are playfull enough ... 'Marry me or else xxxxxx happens.'

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amaysngrace

I like #1 because #2 sounds like it would give me a headache.

 

Does she know about the ring?

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Thicke2013
I like #1 because #2 sounds like it would give me a headache.

 

Does she know about the ring?

 

 

She doesn't know that I have bought a ring but it won't surprise her either. We have talked about marriage a lot. We both went in to this relationship about 16 months ago being completely open. We knew each other before so there were no games being played.

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angel.eyes

Both are great ideas, but I really love #1!

 

With #2, she'll figure out when the limo arrives that a proposal is coming on the date. #1 will be a complete shock.

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Thicke2013
You might not want to put her on the spot in public.

 

Why not write with red lipstick on your bedroom mirror 'Try not to think of a horror when you read this. Will you be my wife ?'.

 

Or ... you could slip her note [in your handwriting], in her day to day routine, asking her to call a certain number, where you leave a message to be read 'Honey, i think it would be a pretty good idea to marry me.'

 

Or, if you are playfull enough ... 'Marry me or else xxxxxx happens.'

 

 

I have in mind something more romantic, or I guess bigger than just a note. Her first husband simply bought a ring and laid it on the table where she would see it when she got home from work. When she picked it up he asked her to marry him. I want more thought in it than that.

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Poppyolive

#2 is beautiful... I shed a wee tear reading it....she will feel, anxious, happy... All bursting emotions this one is super romantic

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Hmmm. I am not much into public displays like this so I would pick #2 simply because it only involves the two of you.

 

There seems to be a real push on stagey engagements lately. I am not sure what's up with that. :o

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Thicke2013
#2 is beautiful... I shed a wee tear reading it....she will feel, anxious, happy... All bursting emotions this one is super romantic

 

I like this one for the same reasons. It is just the two of us. More intimate.

 

Hmmm. I am not much into public displays like this so I would pick #2 simply because it only involves the two of you.

 

There seems to be a real push on stagey engagements lately. I am not sure what's up with that. :o

 

I'm torn on #1. She typically doesn't like to be center of attention and in normal circumstances would kill me for drawing unnecessary attention to her. In this case though I think every woman should be the center of attention. I think she would get over it. The downside, is that it is public which means not much of an intimate moment.

 

Anyone have any other ideas? At this point I'm open to suggestions.

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Silly_Girl

Neither would work for me. I like intimate proposals. My ideal might be a picnic in a beautiful scenic spot, just the 2 of us, beautiful view, and a gentle, brief proposal.

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Okay folks, just looking for some ideas here. I have just purchased an engagement ring for my gf. She obviously knows that I am going to ask her to marry me as this isn't either of our first marriages and we have talked about marriage plenty. I do however want the actual day to be a surprise and I want it to be a romantic. I am a romantic at heart and want this to be something she will brag about and never forget. I have younger kids (16, 12, & 6) and I even thought about getting them involved. They love her and she them. I have a couple of ideas.

 

1-We live close to Nashville, TN and go a few times a year to visit. I thought about having her friends invite her on a "girls" only trip. She wouldn't know that I would secretly be there as well. I know a manager at a bar there and thought about organizing with him for one of "our" songs to be played by the band there that night and I could come out on stage and surprise her.

 

2-I wanted to buy her a dress and shoes, have them laying on the bed when she gets home from work one Friday night with a note simply telling her to get dressed and I'll pick her up at 7:00. I would show up in a rented limousine and take her to a fancy restaurant where we would have a romantic dinner. I don't want to ask at dinner because it is over done and not unique at all. From there we would go to a park where I would have wine, flowers, and candles set up. Also there would be a string from one tree to another with cards attached. The first card would be our first date and my feelings for her. The second would be our first kiss and so on until she reaches the last card which would say something like, "We have reached a turning point in our relationship where a very important decision has to be made." When she looks up I would be on one knee with the ring.

 

 

Okay, now your opinions or ideas. Go!!

 

It's really a personal thing and you should choose based on what you know about her personality.

 

For me, I would prefer the second one, as there seems to be a lot more personal touches involved. I would be bawling my eyes out lol. I am also the type who tends to prefer a more private engagement over something done publicly on a stage. I'm sure either way though I would be happy with either of them if my guy is asking me, but if I had a choice I would much prefer the second, it's more intimate IMO and I feel it would be a story that I would love to tell over and over.

 

But your gf and I aren't the same people so my preferences and hers may differ, so again, at the end of the day make sure to go with what you feel SHE would most appreciate.

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d0nnivain
2-I wanted to buy her a dress and shoes, have them laying on the bed when she gets home from work one Friday night with a note simply telling her to get dressed and I'll pick her up at 7:00. I would show up in a rented limousine and take her to a fancy restaurant where we would have a romantic dinner. I don't want to ask at dinner because it is over done and not unique at all. From there we would go to a park where I would have wine, flowers, and candles set up. Also there would be a string from one tree to another with cards attached. The first card would be our first date and my feelings for her. The second would be our first kiss and so on until she reaches the last card which would say something like, "We have reached a turning point in our relationship where a very important decision has to be made." When she looks up I would be on one knee with the ring.

 

 

A BF did something similar for me (not a proposal though). The limo picked me up at work. Inside was the outfit, champagne & roses. Limo drove me home to change, then we picked up BF. If it's not too late, can the kids meet you at the park?

 

 

I wouldn't "crash" the girls' weekend. That could backfire.

 

 

Happy planning & good for you for wanting to make it memorable.

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Thicke2013
A BF did something similar for me (not a proposal though). The limo picked me up at work. Inside was the outfit, champagne & roses. Limo drove me home to change, then we picked up BF. If it's not too late, can the kids meet you at the park?

 

No it's not too late. I haven't planned anything as of yet. Just kicking around ideas. I had thought about having the kids standing behind the tree and when she reads the last card have them step out, each holding their own card. The first one says "Will you" the second, "Marry", and the third obviously, "Us"? Only problem is my 6 year old son won't stand still that long! LOL

 

 

I wouldn't "crash" the girls' weekend. That could backfire.

 

I'm not worried about it backfiring on me because I would have her friends in on it. We all get along great and they know that we are talking about marriage. Just not sure about making it public. I tend to lean toward the more intimate settings.

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d0nnivain

By backfire, I meant that one of the friends could spill the beans. Also you mentioned that your intended doesn't like to be the center of attention. Ergo a public proposal isn't a great idea.

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angel.eyes

I'm intensely private. However, the effort and thought that goes into planning #1 and pulling it off, would be why I would be incredibly appreciative. Weddings and getting married are basically public ways of declaring your love and commitment to someone. You can be personally committed and deeply in love with someone...but if you refuse to marry, chances are the other person has a hard time. There's something about the public declaration. Same here.

 

The other reason for picking #1, is you as a couple can get lost in the family. Many marriages seem to lose their way because the focus unconsciously shifts to the family unit over time, and the couple loses their identity as a couple. It's important to make sure you do things that involve just the two of you from time to time, as much as you love and cherish your kids. I think you set the tone early in the relationship.

 

What I might suggest if you go with #1, is to have a handwritten note or card that you give her once you're alone that tells her how much she means to you, why you're so in love with her, and how much you're looking forward to sharing the rest of your lives together.

 

Either option is really, really great by the way! I would be happy with either. She's very lucky.:) Pick the one that you think she might prefer.

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Thicke2013
I'm intensely private. However, the effort and thought that goes into planning #1 and pulling it off, would be why I would be incredibly appreciative. Weddings and getting married are basically public ways of declaring your love and commitment to someone. You can be personally committed and deeply in love with someone...but if you refuse to marry, chances are the other person has a hard time. There's something about the public declaration. Same here.

 

The other reason for picking #1, is you as a couple can get lost in the family. Many marriages seem to lose their way because the focus unconsciously shifts to the family unit over time, and the couple loses their identity as a couple. It's important to make sure you do things that involve just the two of you from time to time, as much as you love and cherish your kids. I think you set the tone early in the relationship.

 

What I might suggest if you go with #1, is to have a handwritten note or card that you give her once you're alone that tells her how much she means to you, why you're so in love with her, and how much you're looking forward to sharing the rest of your lives together.

 

Either option is really, really great by the way! I would be happy with either. She's very lucky.:) Pick the one that you think she might prefer.

 

Thanks! One of the main reasons I liked idea #1 is because it keeps her surprised until I come out. The other is romantic and intimate, but like a previous poster said she is going to smell it coming from a mile away when the limo shows up.

 

One thing to add, I sing some. Like never in front of people but I sing to my kids and I have sang to her a couple of times. She loves it and says I have a great voice. Now, I'm not naive enough to believe that I'm really that good, I know she is saying that because she loves me. However, When I sang to her in the past, she always cried and got emotional. It touched her. She said she had never had anyone do anything like that for her. Would it be a good idea for me to try and arrange where I would sing "our" song? What would you guys do if your BF did that kind of thing. Thoughts?

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mrs rubble

I love a man to sing for me, my last bf was the lead vocalist in a blues band. It was sooooo romantic driving around with him singing to me.:love:

 

Your proposal- I like idea no1 very much. Another one I thought of was a hot air balloon ride, where you could both be "on top of the world" as you propose.

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A Guy from work did the neatest proposal. He told his gf they were going on a poker run ( they both love to ride Harleys). each stop was set up so their card value equaled a prize box.. when they handed their clues in, they got to pick a prize box based on the number value of their cards . As she opened the box, (it was a music box her grandmother loaned and she cherished), a ring was inside and he got down on one knee and proposed. His friends captured it on video. It was awesome!

So it was different yet somehow fit their lifestyle together.

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A Guy from work did the neatest proposal. He told his gf they were going on a poker run ( they both love to ride Harleys). each stop was set up so their card value equaled a prize box.. when they handed their clues in, they got to pick a prize box based on the number value of their cards . As she opened the box, (it was a music box her grandmother loaned and she cherished), a ring was inside and he got down on one knee and proposed. His friends captured it on video. It was awesome!

So it was different yet somehow fit their lifestyle together.

 

That's awesome, it also shows that he truly knows her.

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Thicke2013
A Guy from work did the neatest proposal. He told his gf they were going on a poker run ( they both love to ride Harleys). each stop was set up so their card value equaled a prize box.. when they handed their clues in, they got to pick a prize box based on the number value of their cards . As she opened the box, (it was a music box her grandmother loaned and she cherished), a ring was inside and he got down on one knee and proposed. His friends captured it on video. It was awesome!

So it was different yet somehow fit their lifestyle together.

 

This brings up another plus for idea #1. I could hire someone or ask a friend to capture the actual proposal on video. Would be almost impossible with idea #2.

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Thicke2013
I love a man to sing for me, my last bf was the lead vocalist in a blues band. It was sooooo romantic driving around with him singing to me.:love:

 

Your proposal- I like idea no1 very much. Another one I thought of was a hot air balloon ride, where you could both be "on top of the world" as you propose.

 

Like I said, I'm no vocalist! :laugh: But I think I sound decent. My 12 year old told me once I should go on American Idol so that counts for something right? LOL

 

My GF told me the same thing. The first time I sang for her was after a date. I had feelings that a certain song of ours seemed to express better than I ever could. I recorded myself singing on my phone and text it to her. She called me back crying saying she has never had anyone touch her like that before. I have never actually sang in front of her. This would be the first time. Would that make it more memorable?

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I don't like #1 because it feels more about you than about her. Not only will you be crashing her night with her friends, but singing to her on stage in front of a bar of people? That sounds like a nightmare for a woman who doesn't like to be the center of attention! I don't like to be the center of attention and I would be mortified!

 

#2 is more romantic, but there is no surprise element there at all. Once she sees the dress on the bed, she'll know something is up. If you do that, you better make sure you know her size. (I always wonder when I see this happening in movies...my size varies so much depending on the brand...but the guys in the movies always seem to exactly know the perfect size and it fits like a glove.)

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angel.eyes

So windows won't shatter when you sing?:p

 

Yes, I would definitely sing to her, since it's something she has really treasured in the past.

 

When are you planning to propose? I'm very excited for both of you!:) It's so sweet that you're taking the time and effort to plan. You sound like such an amazing guy, and I'm sure she'll enjoy your proposal. Please let us know how it goes.

 

Like I said, I'm no vocalist! :laugh: But I think I sound decent. My 12 year old told me once I should go on American Idol so that counts for something right? LOL

 

My GF told me the same thing. The first time I sang for her was after a date. I had feelings that a certain song of ours seemed to express better than I ever could. I recorded myself singing on my phone and text it to her. She called me back crying saying she has never had anyone touch her like that before. I have never actually sang in front of her. This would be the first time. Would that make it more memorable?

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I'm kind of outlier but my proposal was to bring in a special 'bear' from England to present the ring and add that bear to her collection while proposing in a Santa suit after having played Santa to all the kids at a party a close male friend of hers traditionally held each Christmas season and whom assisted me in my subterfuge.

 

Best line of the party, from a kid of course: 'Why is that lady kissing Santa Claus? :D

 

Anyway, you'll find the approach which works for you. Best wishes!

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Thicke2013

So I asked last night and she said yes!

 

I actually didn't do either exactly the way I had originally planned. I did have the limo pick us up and take us to a very nice restaurant. We had an awesome dinner and some drinks. After that, I had the driver take us to the waterfront looking back at the city skyline. (we had a date night here on one of our first dates) We sat and reminisced some about how far we had come. I paid a guy there taking pictures of the skyline to take a picture of the two of us. Once back in the limo, I told her I had a gift for her. It was one of her favorite books ( I had carved a slot in the book and the ring was hidden inside. She opened the book and I knelt down in front of her and asked her to be my wife. She happily accepted!

 

Thanks to everyone for the replies and well wishes!

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