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Why do men do this?


Friends and Lovers Progressing into "Friends with benefits" and beyond: When platonic relationships become more intimate.

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Old 16th March 2019, 11:20 PM   #1
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Why do men do this?

Why does this man every time I see him flirt and bring up sexual remarks but once I leave he never initiates anything. He is always shaky nervous around me and talks a mile a minute and flirts a lot. I’m shy on the other hand and an introvert.

He is an extrovert but with me I can tell he gets nervous. I feel like I do the best I can to show him I’m interested and get nothing back. Why is he even hinting at sexual stuff then? Why even do that if you are not going to make a move?

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 17th March 2019 at 1:46 AM.. Reason: Fix formatting, move to F&L
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Old 16th March 2019, 11:27 PM   #2
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For every 2 men who has done this I can name 1 woman who has done this If you want him to make more moves, you may have to be patient in letting him get comfortable enough to make some moves. He will also - be over the moon if you were to make some moves on him. He's probably not had as much experience as you hoped he would, so he's nervous from testing the waters. Make it easy for him and enjoy the ride.
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Old 16th March 2019, 11:51 PM   #3
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Flirting can be done with no plans to take things further. He may not be interested in dating you and just enjoys a little flirting.
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Old 16th March 2019, 11:57 PM   #4
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I have a buddy like this. Great guy, funny, and he has a lot of female friends. However, the guy just can't close the deal with any of them. For a lot of guys, it's a big step going from flirting to actually making a move on a girl.
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Old 17th March 2019, 12:09 AM   #5
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Why would he hint around at sexual stuff then? Every conversation he throws something sexual into it somehow.
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Old 17th March 2019, 12:14 AM   #6
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He's likely into you - consider being patient with him and taking it further. If you are very disturbed by his not making any moves, you can move on and check out a new guy =)
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Old 17th March 2019, 1:27 AM   #7
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Originally Posted by Pink86 View Post
Why would he hint around at sexual stuff then? Every conversation he throws something sexual into it somehow.
If he's not interested in dating you? Because it's fun even if not taken further.
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Old 17th March 2019, 2:43 AM   #8
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Quote:
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He is always shaky nervous around me...


...but with me I can tell he gets nervous. I feel like I do the best I can to show him Iím interested and get nothing back.
Here's your answer. This guy wants to initiate but is too nervous to do so, for fear of upsetting or offending you, or otherwise messing the whole thing up.

Do you like this guy? If so, what's stopping you from initiating yourself? I'd say that once he gets comfortable with you there will be nothing stopping him from taking the lead.
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Old 17th March 2019, 6:56 AM   #9
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Why does this man every time I see him flirt and bring up sexual remarks but once I leave he never initiates anything. He is always shaky nervous around me and talks a mile a minute and flirts a lot. I’m shy on the other hand and an introvert.
Why would you be interested in some fool who doesn't even have the good grace to know better than to make moronic sexual remarks to you? Do you actually find that flattering?
Quote:
Why would he hint around at sexual stuff then? Every conversation he throws something sexual into it somehow.
Please see above.

He sounds like a classless degenerate. You can do A LOT better.

Last edited by Mrs._December; 17th March 2019 at 6:58 AM..
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Old 17th March 2019, 11:08 AM   #10
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I think he is doing it to awkwardly flirt with me. I think he means no harm by it. I think he is trying not to get friendzoned so he trys to keep a little sexual tension in the conversation but I donít know.
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Old 17th March 2019, 11:14 AM   #11
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Can you give us some examples of the sexual stuff he says to you?i
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Old 17th March 2019, 11:17 AM   #12
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Is this your OBGYN doctor (mentioned in your first thread) or your co-worker? Iíve noticed itís not uncommon for men to engage in innocent flirting. They most likely have a girlfriend/wife already and are having a little fun.
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Old 17th March 2019, 11:18 AM   #13
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I would call him out and say "You are all talk, no action."
He won't like it and perhaps make a move. If not go for it.

Guys love assertive woman so I have been told. Any time I have gone for it, it's ended well.
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Old 17th March 2019, 11:23 AM   #14
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Originally Posted by JuneL View Post
Is this your OBGYN doctor (mentioned in your first thread) or your co-worker? Iíve noticed itís not uncommon for men to engage in innocent flirting. They most likely have a girlfriend/wife already and are having a little fun.
But I donít see what he did as flirting: making sexual comments is creepy and crass.
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Old 17th March 2019, 11:30 AM   #15
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Seems this is the 50 something, 20+ years older co-worker, but I cannot find the answer to the question, is he single?
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