sallyjoe Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 so me and this guy (let’s call him bob) have been friends for a while. when i first met bob, i thought he was cute but i had this thing with another guy that wasn’t a relationship yet but eventually turned into one. me and this other guy dated for a couple months and while we were dating, bob got a girlfriend. a couple months ago, my ex broke up with me and i called bob crying and he gave me all this advice told me if i ever went back to my ex he would slap me and talk me out of it. then we joked around about if i were to date one of his friends and bob was like no he’s not good for you. anyways, i think i love bob but he’s still with his girlfriend. a couple days ago i snapchatted him that i was thinking about him (i mean he is my best friend) and i was curious on how he was doing. for the first him he opened up to me about something with his girlfriend but used it to bring us closer??? idk he said can you facetime and told me about it. i thought nothing really of it but then the following day he texted me and said “hey do you want to grab some food after school i have money i can pay for us” and we ended up hanging out. he wanted to drive to the farthest possible food place and we talked a bunch in the car. he touched my arm often. laughed at almost everything i said. it felt like we were on a date. he looked at me with this smile and i don’t even know how to explain it, it just couldn’t be a smile a friend would give. he asked me about my plans for the future and he told me about his weird corky likes. he told me to text him when i got home safe. he told his whole family about me too. when i was with my ex, i always used to refer to bob as my gay best friend that isn’t gay. he hated that and i never knew why. idk i think he might have feelings for me and he didn’t want me to think of him like a gbf. i have no idea what to do or if he even likes me someone please help me. thank you Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 Your life is not a soap opera. Don't act like it is one. While he has a GF keep your distance. You can still be friends, but no more one on one meals far out of town. Link to post Share on other sites
PRW Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 Yes, he is into you but he is insecure. His attitude toward your EX and his "friend" that he said wasn't good for you is just him trying to keep the competition out of the way and keep you available in the event that he fails with his current girl. So he will try to sabotage any other guy that comes around you. When you got together in that story it was a covert date. He drove as far away for it as he did so that no one who knew either one of you would see you two together. This makes him a little dishonest and he was, at minimum, borderline cheating on his GF with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Beachead Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 (edited) Here's my take OP, He set that plan up far away from home which is important to note. It tells me he didn't want anyone to see the two of you together. I have a strange feeling he didn't tell her about it either. So yes, he likes you. Great right? Not really. He has a GF which makes what he did shady because he's creating conditions for a potential cheat on his GF with you. If you can't understand this, imagine you and him got together and you are happy as a girlfriend..now imagine you found out he went out with someone else behind your back. Don't let your feelings distort logic. How would you feel? If he can do that with her, he can do that with you. Don't play with fire unless you want to get burned. - Beach Edited February 8, 2019 by Beachead Link to post Share on other sites
Lodestar Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 Yeah that’s pretty dodgy, be careful. As a guy who was once like that, I can tell you that he’s probably really insecure and is trying to set you up as a back up. He’s the kind of guy that will cheat, he is afraid to be alone and is coming to u for the attention he feels he is not getting from his current girl. If you had to date him, he would require constant validation and go looking for it elsewhere when he can’t get it. Is he really the kind of person you want to date? He is talking you out of other potential suitors, and it’s unlikely that it’s because he cares about you - it’s more that he selfishly wants you as his fall girl to the point he will sabotage any potential relationships, meaning he really doesn’t care whether you’re happy or not, all he cares about is having you as an option I was a lot like he was, I am ashamed to say. I hurt some wonderful girls and missed loads of chances to find love because I was too busy being selfish and not actually caring about the girl I was with Link to post Share on other sites
Simple Logic Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 if Bob is interested in you while he has a GF, he has an issue he has to resolve. I would not be the lady in waiting for Bob. Meet someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
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