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Girl got mad for me stopping over


Friends and Lovers Progressing into "Friends with benefits" and beyond: When platonic relationships become more intimate.

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Old 28th January 2019, 7:28 PM   #1
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Girl got mad for me stopping over

I’m good friends with this girl who is single and we’ve talked about dating at some point but just friends for now. Well we had plans to go to an appointment today and I texted her to confirm and she yes and would text me when she got home but her phone was dying. Well the pre arranged time to meet her came up and I hadn’t heard back from her so I decided to just swing by and pick her up because I knew her phone might have died and she didn’t have time to charge it before we had to leave. Anyway I got to her house and her roommate let me in and I walked in and my friend was there with another guy friend of hers. Ok no problem... I thought to myself... I didn’t say a word about him. I even said hi to him and her. Then she pulls me aside and says we have to talk... so we go into a separate room and she says she’s pissed off because I came over unannounced and how rude that was of me and how I shouldn’t be stalking her and how she hates how everyone has to know what’s up with her all time. I apologized calmly to her and simply explained we had the appointment and that I wasn’t sure if her phone was still dead so I stopped by instead. I told her that I normally wouldn’t just show up first. And I’ve never done that before over the years of our friendship. And I’m not the type to stalk people. She was just livid and told me she’ll call me later when she’s ready to talk. I said ok and left without making a big deal or even saying anything other then sorry for coming by like that.

Your thoughts ?
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Old 28th January 2019, 7:31 PM   #2
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Is this behaviour out of character for her? Or is she generally a bit of a diva?
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Old 28th January 2019, 7:37 PM   #3
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I’ve never seen her get mad at me before. Totally out of character for her.
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Old 28th January 2019, 8:09 PM   #4
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I assume that from your sentence “Just friend for now” means that you have romantic/sexual interest in her and that this was a preliminary date of sorts. When a girl avoids answering you or gives you a non-answer like “Let me check my schedule!!” She’s really saying “You’re nice, but I’m not interested.” Corey Wayne has many, many videos on the subject, and his book “How to be 3% man” goes over this as well. If this was the case then she reacted angerly because you didn’t “catch her drift” and instead she wanted to spend time with other people.
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Old 28th January 2019, 8:20 PM   #5
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She is mad because you c--k blocked her.
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Old 28th January 2019, 8:47 PM   #6
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What kind of appointment was it? I'm trying to think of what kind of appointment a guy/girl friendship pair would go to together.
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Old 28th January 2019, 8:49 PM   #7
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It was a vet appointment for our dog we have. I keep the dog at my house because she can’t have it at hers. But she was going to come with to ask the vet some questions.
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Old 28th January 2019, 10:30 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Monkeyguy8070 View Post
It was a vet appointment for our dog we have. I keep the dog at my house because she can’t have it at hers. But she was going to come with to ask the vet some questions.
So you co-own a dog with her? Did you ever date?

(No judgment on the co-owning a dog ....I'm doing it with a 9 1/2 week old puppy at the moment.....technically and legally the dog is my mom's, but she's being raised by me because my mom's mobility is less than ideal.)
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Old 28th January 2019, 10:53 PM   #9
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You embarrassed her by showing up while her boyfriend was there.

What you did was totally explainable. I get it.

Cut this off. Whether you have projected your feelings onto her (I love her so she loves me too) with some preconceived idea that there is something there. Her actions tell you all you need to know.

Move on quickly.

Last edited by Marc878; 28th January 2019 at 10:59 PM..
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Old 29th January 2019, 7:45 AM   #10
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She's pissed off because she wants to keep you both in orbit and doesn't want her options colliding.
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Old 29th January 2019, 8:03 AM   #11
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You had the prearranged time. You tried to confirm. You assumed she didn't respond because her phone died not because she was ghosting you. If she didn't want you there, she should have been clear about that. She could have borrowed her roommates' phone to tell you to stay away. She caused her own problem not you.

However now you know she is unreliable, has poor communication skills & doesn't care about your dog. Take the dog & both of you walk right out of her life. If she wants you back in it, she can send you an engraved invitation. Otherwise stop bothering with her.

How rude of her. Good riddance.
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Old 29th January 2019, 8:51 AM   #12
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You did nothing wrong here. (Unless you have been angling to get to her place for a long time and with this "excuse" accomplished it)
BUT
Stop wasting your time with this girl.
This is going nowhere from a friend or lover, or indeed dog owner perspective.
Forget her, set your sights elsewhere
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Old 29th January 2019, 10:09 AM   #13
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"Our" dog?

Yeah. No.

It's your dog and hers when it's convenient.

And her rude, unacceptable behavior should tell you exactly how much of a 'friend' this witch really is.
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Old 31st January 2019, 1:42 PM   #14
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You showed up at the scheduled time at the scheduled place for an agreed upon task and she's mad? That's a new one! People usually get mad when you DON'T show up when and where you are supposed to!
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