changingmale Posted November 1, 2018 Share Posted November 1, 2018 If you are in a fwb relationship when done having sex or whatever you call it do you cuddle or leave within a few mins or what? My ex and i have had sex 2 times and the last time we cuddled for at least 1.5 hrs or seemed and i got mixed signs and i am mad now bc she still wants a fwb and nothing more Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 1, 2018 Share Posted November 1, 2018 FWB is just a nonsense thing to agree to. I mean, "friends with benefits," come on. If you are attracted to someone enough to have sex and you like them as a friend and are otherwise hanging out as friends, I don't see why not just be committed. And if you don't like them as a real friend, then there's no sense to the term "friend with benefits." It's just sex and no one should pretend it's not or be acting affectionate because if you feel affectionate, why not just date or commit to the person? If neither person is simply wanting to commit because they want to see other people, just call it dating around not exclusively, not "friends with benefits." When an ex wants FWB, it seems to me they just want to have their cake and eat it to -- and unless both parties are detached and un in love enough to do that, then that's just dating nonexclusively, but usually in an ex situation, there's one hoping to get back together -- and that person should not let themself be used by the ex until someone else comes along, after which they're going to drop you like a hot potato and it's going to hurt. Have boundaries. If you want just sex with her, have sex and get up and leave. If you want the relationship back, deprive her of any relationship unless she wants the relationship commitment back too, because if you don't, you're the one getting hurt, not the one who doesn't care all that much but just finds you comforting or convenient. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted November 1, 2018 Share Posted November 1, 2018 Is this FWB with your estranged wife? https://www.loveshack.org/forums/transitioning/friends-lovers/667775-separated-wife-wants-fwb If so, it makes the issue a whole lot more complicated than a standard FWB thing. Cuddling after sex fulfils the need for physical affection - it doesn't necessarily mean that it's filling an emotional need. As you are (quite understandably) struggling with this, I suggest you get some boundaries in place. For example, no sex unless you are both committed to saving the marriage. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Nilfiry Posted November 1, 2018 Share Posted November 1, 2018 What you do after depends on your relationship status, and by that I mean whether you are good friends that get along well platonically or just associates looking for sex. The only problems with "FWB's" is that when you spend a lot of time touching and holding someone, you naturally gain some affection for them--it is in the hormones--, and most people are not able to keep their emotions in check at all. When the feelings kick in, things get complicated. If you are not the type that can override your emotions with your mind, you should not get involved. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted November 1, 2018 Share Posted November 1, 2018 If you are in a fwb relationship when done having sex or whatever you call it do you cuddle or leave within a few mins or what? In all of the "FWB" situations I have been in, I left a few minutes after it was done/over. I wanted to sleep in my own bed, alone and so did each woman. One woman was very specific about me never sleeping over and that she would call/text/sext me when she wanted sex, which was fine with me. Those are the usual "ground rules" I've experienced with "FWB". Link to post Share on other sites
Author changingmale Posted November 2, 2018 Author Share Posted November 2, 2018 What about kissing? Do you kiss or pay as much attention to your fwb as you would if you was in love and having sex,making love.Seems like kissing would be more intimate and i have heard some prositutes would not do any kind of kissing Link to post Share on other sites
central Posted November 2, 2018 Share Posted November 2, 2018 For me, a FWB is a friend, and we happen to have sex. There is usually a good reason it isn't a full relationship, and we're both good with that. I will hang out and sometimes even cuddle with opposite sex friends with no benefits, so I am definitely okay with cuddling and hanging out after sex with a FWB. We even go out and do things together socially - as friends do. If they just want sex and not the friendship aspects, you are a booty call or "fornication" buddy, not a FWB. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted November 2, 2018 Share Posted November 2, 2018 What about kissing? Do you kiss or pay as much attention to your fwb as you would if you was in love and having sex,making love. Of course we kissed and yes, I paid attention to the woman's needs, maybe more so... As I want them to call me again. Link to post Share on other sites
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