girlbyday Posted May 5, 2017 Share Posted May 5, 2017 I have had a study buddy (ok I'm doing most of the teaching) for a while now, and we have very quickly become really good friends. He will tell me super personal things, we will hang out outside of our study sessions, we will go on road trips together, he'll be the perfect gentleman, even show some physical affection (touching my arm, putting his hand on my shoulder), carry my things, take me shopping, listen to me, support me, tell me nice things. He has never made a move on me, but my friend (through whom I met him) told me he's very weird about girls. When he told me sometimes he feels he's missing out on a bunch of things because he's all about work and not about relationships, I ask him if he wants a relationship and he goes between yes and no. He is a good guy, he doesn't smoke or drink, is super close to his family and very generous and kind, honestly the kindest person I've ever met. I feel there is more to that story, but he asked me to leave it alone so I'm doing that. When I don't text him he will text me randomly, suggest stuff to do, yesterday we spent the day together and he said he had fun but the time flew by too quickly. When we are together we laugh, joke, talk about serious stuff, we are about the same age (mid-20s), single and not repulsive in any way. My gay friends told me they don't think he's gay, just slightly lost when it comes to girls. I really like him but have no idea how to proceed. He didn't mention any girls in any contexts. Thank you in advance. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 5, 2017 Share Posted May 5, 2017 Maybe he just doesn't know if he's gay or not -- or maybe he's more asexual. It's also possible he has a big problem with erectile dysfunction and won't get into romantic situations where he'll be humiliated. I mean, he doesn't want to talk about it, so not much you can do. I was in love with an ED guy once and he hung around all the time and we were kind of romantic, but he avoided sex like the plague. It took him years to get it straightened out. He had been molested. I wouldn't get my hopes up about this guy, but he sounds like a great friend. You need to not let yourself focus on him romantically because he doesn't even want to talk about it, much less DO it. So make yourself keep dating. This guy isn't ready to. Link to post Share on other sites
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