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Suddenly attracted to a friend


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belle_athletic

Hi everyone! New to the forum here, but wanted some advice. I'm a college sophomore. I have a friend whom I've known since freshman year. He's a nice guy, but I've never really been attracted because we're the same height (I'm 5'7), he's asian (generally not into asian guys), and he's not very big, and I prefer bigger guys (his shoulders are the same width as mine). I generally like athletic guys, being an athlete myself (I play women's lacrosse).

 

The other day, I saw him at the campus pool, which I was visiting for the first time. He was only in his swimming gear, and I saw that he was really ripped: his chest was much bigger than I thought, biceps, abs, shoulders, everything. I realised that I'd never seen him shirtless before, so I always thought he was skinny.

 

In the days after that, I realized I was fantasizing about him more and more. It's weird, because intellectually, I know he's totally not my type, but I find myself getting really attracted, what should I do?

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Hi everyone! New to the forum here, but wanted some advice. I'm a college sophomore. I have a friend whom I've known since freshman year. He's a nice guy, but I've never really been attracted because we're the same height (I'm 5'7), he's asian (generally not into asian guys), and he's not very big, and I prefer bigger guys (his shoulders are the same width as mine). I generally like athletic guys, being an athlete myself (I play women's lacrosse).

 

The other day, I saw him at the campus pool, which I was visiting for the first time. He was only in his swimming gear, and I saw that he was really ripped: his chest was much bigger than I thought, biceps, abs, shoulders, everything. I realised that I'd never seen him shirtless before, so I always thought he was skinny.

 

In the days after that, I realized I was fantasizing about him more and more. It's weird, because intellectually, I know he's totally not my type, but I find myself getting really attracted, what should I do?

 

3 options :

 

Go up to him and chat; wait for him to come to you ; continue the fantasies

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Oh, this is a golden opportunity and you should definitely let him know you are interested. I bet he will be over the moon. Asian guys tend to have a hard time, or at least the ones who come on here.

 

Here's what I would do. You just saw him in swimming gear, so why not just say with a big smile, Saw you at the pool the other day. Why you been keeping all those muscles a secret. Looking GOOD! Or just text him that. Then he'll be all flustered next time you meet and you will have to keep up the flirting.

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GunslingerRoland

Who cares if he is your type if he's nice, you get a long with him, and now you are attracted to him, go for it.

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caveman621

So he's already your friend? So you already have a relationship? But you'd like, um, more? I know I'm being the typical male pig, but if your opinion of the TYPE of relationship you might have with him changed when you saw how "ripped" he was? So you want a physical relationship? Since you are already friends, I can only guess you want to add to that? Or seeing his body makes you want to have a closer intellectual relationship?

 

I know, all questions, no answers, but you see what I'm getting at.

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todreaminblue

if i like a guy i get to know him more, ill go with the strongest common ground to spark conversation.....my hearts interests and i can keep a conversation going and really thats all you need to do .....be active...be friendly and find out where it leads....make him laugh as soon as possible it relieves tension and shyness....

 

it may lead to dating you just dont know....if you feel shy about it do it over a phone call.....make it feel natural...... easy on him.....i woudl suggest fitness and regimes might be a good common ground for you to start a conversation and tangent off.....go with what you know you have in common....and then see how much more there is to him than his abs.....from expereince theres a lot more to look for...getting to know a guy is half the fun..take it slow......deb

Edited by todreaminblue
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