sirwell Posted July 11, 2016 Share Posted July 11, 2016 Hello my friends of loveshack,I am new in the forum, and what a good way of introducing me to you that posting a dude I hope you can help me. I have a question about what should I do in a particular situation, but before my question, I think I should tell my tale: The tale begins when I met a woman in college. I am an introvert and cold guy most of the times. due that I am very selective when making friends, but when I open to someone I trust I am almost like an extrovert person. The fact is that I met a girl (which I call girl A) in college that after three months began to flirt with me. She had a bad reputation among the typical men who want to f**k due her personality(that was contrary to mine), but she was very nice and good person in general. "A" girl had a friend (girl B ) that she met almost at the same time than me in college who was more reserved (like me) and raised with the same values I was raised, very different from girl A. I had a natural chemistry with girl B (we almost seemed to be dating) , but the fact is that I decided to give me an opportunity with girl A because she was interested in me and I thought she had good qualities that can make her a good girlfriend (my first one in fact). the fact is that during the time I was knowing girl "A" before we start a relationship, I was realizing that she was not the right woman for me (in fact I always knew that, but I bet for her and I liked her). our time knowing each other did not go very well, since "A" basically wanted me to become someone I was not. I heard "A" said I am like her but I was not her type (Maybe she liked my body or how I look since maybe my body is not according to my personality). After a time "A" became her enemy of girl B because she realized B had a "crush" on me and began to defame "B" and his relates. "A" was very paranoiac. It may be true that "B" had a crush on me, but she never slander "A" ( in fact it was the contrary, she support us). In the end, I finished everything with "A" because I did not like her acts or trust her, and finally I realized which was the person that deserve my attention. however, I have a dilemma right know. After "breaking up" with "A" , "B" asked if I was going to be close to other relationships in the future (since I am a someone focused in my goals), and talk me about how alike we are. Since then in her own way she has been giving me "signs" that she likes me, but I think I do not deserve to be with her since I chose "A" over her. so what should I do, should I take the step of making her my girlfriend in a future after confirming her feelings (I am very careful since I don't want to confuse friendship with flirt or love), or should I let it pass and assume my error. !!guys help mee!! Link to post Share on other sites
burnt Posted July 11, 2016 Share Posted July 11, 2016 So, you like her, respect her, you two sound like you have compatible set of values and personalities, you two have a chemistry, you clearly have fallen for her, and she is giving you "signs", but .... I'm sorry, what's your dilemma again? I don't see a dilemma. I see two lucky people with a wonderful possibility for a wonderful relationship. What are you waiting for? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NTV Posted July 11, 2016 Share Posted July 11, 2016 Or the "B" girl could be giving you signed because if you dated it would be revenge against the "A" girl. So what? Ask her out and see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sirwell Posted July 11, 2016 Author Share Posted July 11, 2016 MTV thank you for your answer but I discard that posibility. I did not dated girl "A" , but during that time spent texting and "knowing" each other (almost a year, she makes her difficult when she doesnt deserve your time), I knew and spent with "B" much more than "A". I can assure you she is not that kind of person. But any possibility is welcome. Thanks for your advice Link to post Share on other sites
Author sirwell Posted July 11, 2016 Author Share Posted July 11, 2016 (edited) So, you like her, respect her, you two sound like you have compatible set of values and personalities, you two have a chemistry, you clearly have fallen for her, and she is giving you "signs", but .... I'm sorry, what's your dilemma again? I don't see a dilemma. I see two lucky people with a wonderful possibility for a wonderful relationship. What are you waiting for? Burnt thank you for your time. I guess you are right, but my dilemma relies in if due that situation that happend (A and B where friends), I deserve to date her. Actually, I feel a little unworthty for not choosing her at first time. In fact I am waiting because I want to make sure that I am not using "B" as escapegoat. I know tha I dont feel anything for "A" (7 months have passed since that). The fact is that I am very perceptive but not experienced in love ("B" in the same way according to what I deduced) and thus, I dont what to mess up our friendship. I clearly understand and agree your point. Thank you. Now I just need to be "brave" yo ask her out. Edited July 11, 2016 by sirwell 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NTV Posted July 11, 2016 Share Posted July 11, 2016 If she picks you, then you aren't unworthy. No more than if you pick her is she unworthy. Being unworthy of her puts her on a false pedestal. She's a person, plain and simple. And she can make up her mind just as much as you can. She isn't some princess in a tower waiting for some dude to kill a dragon. She's not a celebrity or royalty that needs to ensure their mate has a pedigree. She's just a chick and you're just a dude. No worthiness warranted, wanted, or needed. Get that thought process out of your head! It works against you more than it helps. Link to post Share on other sites
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