Simon84 Posted April 26, 2016 Share Posted April 26, 2016 I just don't understand her, I mean she's always hugging me, mostly full on Hugging where our bodies are very close, it becomes very awkward, and I have an end it by saying people are watching, I mean last week she hugged me, while an fell co-worker was sitting close, it was very awkward. All this hugging started earlier this year, - we do fight a lot, have arguments all the time, then we're fine next time we meet, I annoy her, She annoys me, - not too sure what's happening between us, I've never thought anything would have between us, but now after few of this hugs, I've start to like her- which I thought I would never do. I can't explain it. I'm so confused this week after her says " I need to go to a wedding, (which we are attending together next month) when are you going to find yourself a girlfriend & get married, she also commented on " your getting on a bit" But also remarked during the same conversion that she's getting on too. Then proceeded to point out a few girls which I would be interested in. Which work at the same place we do..... Just so confused...... Help 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 The behavior you describe & the attraction it instilled in you is appropriate for the playground not the office. Pulling pig tails as a way of getting attention stopped being cute in the 7th grade. Man up. Ask her for drinks after work but point blank tell her the hugging in the office has to stop. Link to post Share on other sites
Buddhist Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 You're both flirting and being indirect and probably both in denial that you are into each other. She certainly is if she is pointing out prospective women for you. Go to the wedding, ask her on a date while you are there. Problem solved. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Simon84 Posted May 1, 2016 Author Share Posted May 1, 2016 Does she like me or just being friendly? I've been working with this girl for over 5 years, but never once crossed my mind I would like her until recently. During the last couple of months things have started to change, I just don't understand her anymore I mean she's always hugging me, mostly full on Hugging where our bodies are very close, it becomes very awkward, and I have an end it by saying people are watching, I mean last week she hugged me, while an fellow co-worker was sitting close, it was very awkward. All this hugging started earlier this year, - we do fight a lot, have arguments all the time, then we're fine next time we meet, I annoy her, She annoys me, - not too sure what's happening between us, I've never thought anything would have between us, but now after few of this hugs, I've start to like her- which I thought I would never do. I can't explain it. I'm so confused this week after her says " I need to go to a wedding, (which we are attending together next month) when are you going to find yourself a girlfriend & get married, she also commented on " your getting on a bit" But also remarked during the same conversion that she's getting on too. Then proceeded to point out a few girls which I would be interested in. Which work at the same place we do... Just so confused... Help Update :- So Really confused now, spent some time with her, just talking while finishing our last few hours on shift. She never brought up anything but girls like last time , but I did asking her to set me up with one of the girls previously spoken about, and she said she would, but never did. After which we both walked to my car, then gave her a lift to hers... Said our goodbyes & yep confused again... Why are girls so weird? If she likes me just tell me? Or I'm I over thinking theirs something between us? Or wanting something between us? She is a few years young then me, so maybe I'm like a big brother or father figure to her? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 I think she may fancy you but the info you gave is equivocal at best. Go to this wedding you will both be attending & flirt with her. See how that goes. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Girls don't just come up to you and say "I like you, I would like you to ask me out"......NOT! Girls want a "confident" guy to just go up to them and ask them out on a date....that's how it's done. If they say no who cares, nobody dies life goes on as usual. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RedPurpleOrange Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 You got to strike while the iron's hot...otherwise you'll be in the ultimate friendzone. I made this mistake many, many years back. Got infatuated with a female friend over time (very much similar to your current goings-on) when I should've just been manly and got in there from the off. By the time I got balls to do something...I'd put her on a pedestal AND she'd just started seeing someone. OUCH. What you need is to say something overtly naughty and see how she reacts. Ask her out. Maybe grab her in a playful manner and nuzzle her neck and make a sexy growl. And if she recoils or rejects...then you're getting feedback. You do a lot of hugging. It's not like she doesn't trust you. I know it sounds weird...but I know what I'm talking about. Lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Why are girls so hard to read? Because they are girls ! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
RedPurpleOrange Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Hahahahahaha! No wiser word has ever been spoken!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Keats Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Basically she's protected herself from being rejected. You have to make the move and you have to bear being rejected. Otherwise you'll remain her best friend and nothing more. She'll be ok with that too. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 What is her status, is she single? Has she dated, been in a LTR recently? Seeing someone? The hugs may just be sign she misses hugs, because she has not dated for a long time, going through a rough patch, family moved away etc. and maybe not that she wants to hug you in particular in a romantic sort of a way. Some people hug their best friends all the time too. She maybe has no-one else close to hug now. Of course she may also be very interested in you, the wedding gives you a great opportunity to find out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Simon84 Posted May 1, 2016 Author Share Posted May 1, 2016 Firstly I would like to thank everyone for their advice, I think she's been single since April 2015, so it's been almost a year. I don't mind the hugs, not longer then 20 secs!, anything longer then that it gets a bit uncomfortable, I mean the way she hugs me, I wouldn't hug, say my sister or mother, it's wried, it's When she'll hug me side to side while walking, - like say you would if your were a couple. Basically she needs a reason, to be touch / feel... - the thing is I won't say we're the best of friends--- more people at work that are closer to her then me... Link to post Share on other sites
RedPurpleOrange Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Sometimes when you hug someone...you can accidentally touch their butt. Accidents will happen. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Women are as hard to read as a book you don't pick up. so stop wondering & pick up the damn book. You'll know right away what it's about. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
objob1994 Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Girls don't just come up to you and say "I like you, I would like you to ask me out"......NOT! Girls want a "confident" guy to just go up to them and ask them out on a date....that's how it's done. If they say no who cares, nobody dies life goes on as usual. Can I just say that is the best line I've ever read on a forum about dating. "Girls want a "confident" guy to just go up to them and ask them out on a date....that's how it's done. If they say no who cares, nobody dies life goes on as usual". There are many other things which can cause more hurt and pain than asking a girl out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 It's not really a good sign she is willing to find you a date.... But if you must find out if she's at all willing, say, "Fix me up with you." Sounds to me like all this fighting at work is why she's hugging you, so you don't stay mad at work. But who knows. Can't tell if she's flirting or not, honestly. Sometimes people do just run off at the mouth. But if you need to know, ask her for a drink after work. Did you just say you're going to a wedding together, like a date? Or are you just riding together to go to someone's wedding from work? Please clarify. If she asked you to a wedding for a friend of hers, not a coworker, I'd call that a date. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Simon84 Posted May 1, 2016 Author Share Posted May 1, 2016 Thanks you all your good advice, I think preraph, is spot on about the hugs, never really thought about it that way, she just doesn't want to fight during our time at work. I could ask her out, but that would ruining my working relationship with her, so I'm thinking...... Is it worth creating an atmosphere at work. It is a co-workers wedding at we are attending but she's only going if I go..... So.... Maybe I could ask her then... Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Offer to drive her to the wedding. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Jabron1 Posted May 1, 2016 Share Posted May 1, 2016 Why are girls so weird? If she likes me just tell me? Or I'm I over thinking theirs something between us? Or wanting something between us? She is a few years young then me, so maybe I'm like a big brother or father figure to her? Women rarely actually ask a guy out. Women pursue differently than men. They will give you a sign of interest - but they'll make it an equivocal action, so that they can later say that they weren't actually interested if they need to . Like another poster said, women protect themselves from rejection. The way you find out a girls interest is through actions. Ask her number, ask her out, go for a kiss, try to take her back to your place. Judge her actions accordingly, and you'll be able to figure out how interested she is. I could ask her out, but that would ruining my working relationship with her, so I'm thinking...... Is it worth creating an atmosphere at work. It is a co-workers wedding at we are attending but she's only going if I go..... So.... Maybe I could ask her then... That's the next step. You need to get her out, alone, just the two of you. If you are working with her, I'd suggest not doing it. But no one ever listens to that anyway Link to post Share on other sites
Author Simon84 Posted May 3, 2016 Author Share Posted May 3, 2016 Update :- we're sitting and talking, so she has a stretch and yawn at the same time, I'm not really sure if she see me checking out her boobs,(can't remember if I did) but her comment was, " my name & I'm getting a boob job" & smiled, so I relied " you don't need one" she smiled, jumped up and said " I love you" and gave me a hug... Where her face was touching my face..... After this happening... I'm really not sure now, maybe she's just messing with me / knows I like her? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Simon84 Posted May 20, 2016 Author Share Posted May 20, 2016 So basically, I've know this girl for around 5 years, never really fancied her, until she started to give me hugs every single time we met. I'm not too sure if it was her game plan to give me loads of hugs so I would like/fancy her. My question is do girls give hugs to get someone to fancy/like them? Or just being friendly.... I mean a few days back I decided to " test the waters", so as she came to hug him, we hugged as usual but then I nuzzled her neck/ shoulder. After which we chatted for a bit & I left. So the following two day, she gave me a kiss on the cheek. But on the third day nothing. Why?, she was very quite on the following two days. So really confused now.... Why would she act like this? So please help all advice is welcome.... Does she like me, ? Or just bit of friendly flirting ? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 20, 2016 Share Posted May 20, 2016 It's hard to tell from that alone. Try asking her on a date. Then you will know for sure. If you aren't willing to risk the rejection, next time you are out in a group & there is music, ask her to dance. That should clear things up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Jabron1 Posted May 20, 2016 Share Posted May 20, 2016 Mate, you shouldn't worry to much whether or not a girl 'likes you'. Ask her out. Anything less than a yes or a serious reschedule is a no. If she says no, don't get butthurt. Just shrug it off. There's your answer. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
iphone_user1 Posted May 20, 2016 Share Posted May 20, 2016 Take the shot and find out! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NTV Posted May 20, 2016 Share Posted May 20, 2016 It sounds like you aren't even sure if you like her. At least you didn't until she expressed interest, right? I would say figure out if you really like her, or if she's just making herself an easy target first. If you do like her, go for it. If not, why care whether she likes you are not. Link to post Share on other sites
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