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Age 16: hook-up, cant tell if she is losing interest, and need tips for next "date"


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So this girl who was prior already interested in me asked me to come over because her parents weren't home and shes lonely. She is super flirty with every guy just based on her personality but she told me that on a chorus trip we went on she really loved hanging with me and even if it looked like she was interested in other guys that I was the one she really wanted to hang out with. Anyways, she was interested at one point and obviously I went to her house and we just watched tv together and snuggled. She was super clingy and rested her head on me so I couldn't really go in for a kiss. Also before this on the chorus trip we were in NY and she was wearing my jacket and it was all cute and stuff but I didn't kiss her because i was just getting to know her and I told her over text later that I regretted not kissing her and she said that she actually wanted me to. Anyways At one point during the hang out I pulled a move and I kissed her for a brief couple seconds and then pulled out to readjust because I was in an awkward position. She then was like "thats it?" Then at that point I said no and we proceeded to make out and I'm not sure if we were on the same page. I was using tongue where as she wasn't. Normally I wouldn't do this but I came out of a relationship where the girl was super into tongue and It was kinda a force of habit, let me add that it was not an extreme amount. I may be over thinking it but we went on for a while and she never backed out and afterwards we snuggled again and she got even more comfortable. We proceeded like that for an hour or so until i told her I had to leave and when my friend came to pick me up I kissed her goodbye and said ill see you at the bonfire which involves 3 guys and 3 girls me and her being a thing already and the rest are also things (meaning hookup type deals). The next day she never texted me which is pretty normal i guess for the girl, so I texted her and it just seemed like she was less interested but it could be because she was getting ready to go sing somewhere so she was anxious. I asked what her plans were for the rest of spring break and she said that she was going to go party with these boys and she has a couple more gigs and she has Easter stuff to do. I dont know if I ruined my chances or what but i guess the bonfire is my last chance. So what should I do? and do you think shes losing interest or I messed up at all?

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the mind of a teenage girl is a scary place.

 

It doesn't sound as dire as you say but then again for a group of people generally addicted to texting, her lack of communication may be an issue.

 

See how things go at the bonfire & when school resumes.

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Ok thanks for the help, the bonfire is tonight so Ill see how that goes. Good news is after she sang or whatever she said it was like the best performance she ever had and she was super happy and excited. We texted from then on and we got really talkative and we would reply almost instantly and I had a lot of fun talking. Almost like talking to a friend though, whether that's good or bad in my case, I don't know. She then said she was gonna watch this really bad show that we started watching together at the first hang out and she asked me to watch it with her. I told her I hate the show but I love watching it with her so Ill watch it. (She also hates the show but for both of us its like a love hate thing.) We did this until like 3 in the morning and It was pretty fun. Is this a friend zone thing or not? And sorry for the spam, but I guess ultimately Ill find out tonight how everything turns out.:bunny:

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Hug her hello. Her body language will tell you if it's OK to kiss her hello (that's a little peck, do not immediately shove your tongue down her throat.)

 

Sit by her at the fire. Put your arm around her.

 

After a while ask if she wants to go for a walk. Hold her hand. When you get her out of the firelight, then you make your move.

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It wasn't bad but it wasn't good either. Her friends and friends little brothers made it kind of awkward and I don't think any of her friends knew we hooked up so I didn't really want to do any public displays of affection in front of them. I did sit next to her and sat pretty close and we talked and made jokes and it was pretty fun. She had to leave early though because she was going to go drink with her older brothers at home because they were visiting from college. I asked her later if she enjoyed the bonfire and she said her expectations were low but she had a lot of fun which confuses me because nothing really happened. I told her I had high expectations but didn't have that much fun and she asked why and I told her because for one I thought you would stay the whole time but I understand why you left. She said "no one can beat my brother," then She said that me and this other boy that she is close friends with should smoke together. After that she was at home and drank some so I got to text her drunk and It was a little weird. The next morning she messaged me happy Easter and said sorry about last night with a kissy face. I don't know whats happening, help.

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It was positive enough. Take it for what it was.

 

 

Is there a dance or something coming up at school you can ask her to?

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I guess, she says goodbye with hearts a lot now. But no, there are no school dances except prom which we are too young being only sophomores. We both are doing our school musical because of chorus so we see each other a lot. I know for sure we are at least on a friend basis so I can ask her to hang out at some point, but what would be the next move?

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Then ask her to hang out.

 

 

N.B. For any adult men reading this, the 16 year old teenaged BOY can ask a girl to hang out. Once high school is over, friends hang out; romantic partners date.

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So we've been acting extremely flirty and doing boyfriend-girlfriend type stuff so I began to question myself. I didn't want to be doing stuff like this if we werent actually going out, because It was sorta meaningless to me. Because I mean if were acting like were going out why not just go out. So I told her this and I asked her out officially and she said yes. So I guess it all worked out. Thanks for your help :)

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