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Am I just a friend or is he taking it very slow?


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I made an initial post here (https://www.loveshack.org/forums/rom...re-second-date) about a guy who I met on tinder back in April. We really hit it off but he told me he wasn't ready to date again. He had broken up with his only serious girlfriend of about 7 years less than half a year ago at the time. We agreed to be friends, but I decided I wasn’t going to chase him and allow him to initiate contact if he wanted to.

 

The summer goes by, I start dating someone else. And he starts initiating conversation while I’m away in Europe. We message all summer about love, dating and life. He’s been casually dating, but he still doesn’t think he’s ready for anything serious and just having fun meeting new people and I’m still dating my guy. School starts up again (we go to the same university) and we’re still messaging so he suggests we meet up for coffee. It went great, we always have stuff to talk about.

 

But I didn’t have any expectations, because I had been dating someone else. Since school has started we have hung out 4 more times. Once at his apartment, he made a cake. Neither of us initiated any contact after that for about 2 weeks, and then he invites me via facebook to a small party at his place…with all his close friends. I go and there are no other girls there that seem like prospects. He spends most of the night next to me and didn’t want me to leave. The next day he texts me saying it was great that I came and that he hoped I had fun. I decided it was acceptable at that point to initiate convo later that week saying we should hangout. He invites me out with his friends, and we have a great time. He texted me to make sure I got home safe, and initiated convo again the next day about the fun night we had.

 

My gut feeling is telling me that he likes me but wants to take it really slow and be cautious about the whole thing. He did tell me two months ago that he still doesn't know what he wants. I don't want to scare him away. We get along so great, and I feel so much sexual tension. I'm in no rush either..I like it slow. I am technically still dating my guy, but wait I’m not a horrible person let me explain. We agreed to be exclusive (meaning only having sex with each other) and he made it very clear he doesn’t want an actual relationship, he’s actually leaving in about a month to go travel for x period of time. So I’ve done nothing wrong...me and tinder guy are just friends at this point anyway.

 

But I've recently lost so much interest in the guy I'm "dating" because all it has become is sex...especially the more time I spend with tinder guy. I feel so much more like myself with him, and I've really started to like him. So idk what to do...continue taking it slow/being friends or be more forward. He's really not assertive and I feel like he'll never make a move so I really don't know. Again, I don't want to scare him away.

 

Is it possible I'm just a friend? We never talk about other people, or the fact that we did meet on tinder and went on a date in April. It's kinda unspoken. He never talks about other girls or interests (aside from our summer messages) and both times we've been out with his friends he's never talked much with other girls.

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