Why would he call me on my B-day and not come to hang out? What is he doing?

[KK'sLove]

Sorry to keep posting about the same guy but I'm so confused....please help.

 

I've dated this guy on and off for a little over 2 months (full story is in other posts). We hadn't seen each other in over a month and he never calls. I call him about once a week. Well last weekend out of the blue he shows up at the bar that I hang out at. He kept telling me that he's was there for me. Nothing happened we just hung out and had a good time.

 

On Tuesday, I called him and we talked and again he mentioned how he came into see me (I told him that I was happy he did and I thought it was really nice of him) and asked me what I did over the weekend and about my new job and just wanted the details on everything. I asked him to hang out with us some night this weekend (it's my b-day) and he told me in detail all about his already scheduled plans and said that if his plans canceled he would. He said that he would get a hold of me.

 

So yesterday was my birthday, he called me. I was shocked, he hasn't called me first in 6 weeks (he thought one night I told him I loved him, I didn't, but it scared him since he just got out of a long relationship/engagement, so he's put a lot of distance between us). He called to wish me and my twin a Happy Birthday and I asked him if he was going to come and hang out with us. He said that he still didn't know if he was going away and if he wasn't going he still wasn't sure what he was doing. He asked where we were going, I gave him 2 bars, and he asked about how to get to the second one. He said that if he could come into town he would give me a call. Well, around midnight, I left a message on his cell stating that we weren't going to the 2nd bar and that we were staying at the first and I hoped to see him. He never showed up.

 

Why is he doing this? Why did he show up last weekend, called yesterday for my birthday and then not show up? It's like he wants me to know that he thinks about me but yet he didn't show up (and I believe that if a guy really likes you wouldn't they go to see you on your B-day?) I'm thankful that he called but what is going on? I thought of some excuses he could give me, like my friends drove so it wasn't my choice, etc. But all of the excuses I came up with he could of worked it a different way. I just want to know, what he is doing and does he actually like me. By the way, I'm not going to call him anymore, but I don't even know if I should talk to him if he calls. I really like him but this is just too difficult, can you give me any encouragement or advice, please. Thanks!

[DerangedAngel]

Why is he doing this?

 

Um, maybe his previously scheduled plans did not fall through?

 

-Deranged

[magda]

Sorry, can't help you as I am not psychic.

[fanou22]

My ex boyfriend did the same thing and that was 3 years ago. Until this day sometimes I still wonder why he used to do things like that after we broke up. I did not like him a lot, I was head over heels in love with him.

What it finally came down to when I was fed up was he simply wanted a booty call. Sorry to put it this way.

 

"Why does he do things like this?" He does not want you as a girlfriend but he wants to be friends with benefits if you know what I mean.

 

My advice to you, don't tear yourself apart because of him. You deserve someone better. Someone who knows he wants to be with you without going through all these games.