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Friends and Lovers Progressing into "Friends with benefits" and beyond: When platonic relationships become more intimate.

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Old 19th April 2004, 8:46 AM   #1
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Texas
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starting over!

ok hi all.
I am starting over after the end of a 20 year on/off relationship.
I've worked through most of that, done some therapy, ex and I negotiated a good stable parenting relationship, still on good terms.

The first guy I met seemed very attracted ( and he's very attractive ) but I think he's a player and I told him straight I'm not interested in casual sex with him. Not any big moral thing- casual sex is probably just what I need right now, but I think I like him too much and I would want more, and I definitely don't need to have someone acting out around me or using me ( he doesn't seem over his marriage at all, though he's been apart longer than I have) He just kept looking at me and saying he's not ready for a relationship, the timing's off etc. Another time we talked all afternoon and he said why didn't we meet when we were in high school etc. Is he just practising his lines on me? When he looks at me there's love in his eyes, I sense it, can guys put that on?

He's been very odd around me since, eg called me 'my love' in a sarcastic way, keeps talking loudly on his cellphone to other women when I'm around, or to other women there and looks at me all the time.
Have I dented his ego and he's still playing games, or did I get it wrong and there really is a connection?

I guess time will tell! ( patience= not my strong point )
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Old 21st April 2004, 8:58 PM   #2
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: The OC baby!
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I guess time will tell!
My advice is to play it safe because he already told you that:

he's not ready for a relationship,
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Old 21st April 2004, 9:57 PM   #3
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I agree & I decided no more intimacy/ loving looks either unless its in a relationship ( or with cute old friends where we both know the score! )
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