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friendzone story


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i dont know how cliche this story may sound but here it is:

 

so theres a girl ive been cool w/ since the beginning of college(few yr, i know), shes pretty damn attractive in general and most of the time we were together we were studying... it seemed kinda clear, just over time that we were just friends

 

now, over the last month of so in preparing for exams, she seemed a bit more playful (leaning on my shoulder, physical), unlike when we first met... i read this as maybe she was slightly interested. also, i found out more about her and her interests, and realized that she was someone id really would like to go out w/ rather than being just cool with. so recently i gathered up the courage to let her know how she made me feel, and all she said was aww thanks, then as she was leaving to go home, i turned around, in the rain, ran back to her, and attempted to kiss her but only got her cheek... later i got hit with the "i dont wanna lose you as a good friend" text

 

now, days after, i still feel miserable, even though i thought this would be something i would shrug off... i think the thing is the fact that ive known her a while, and just recently realized that "hey i really like this girl". i think where i messed up is that i wasn't upfront about it from the start, and i think i'll start doing that from now on. now im thinking that this will always be in the back of my mind, just that moment of getting rejected, while its raining! the one benefit from this is im glad i tried that in the first place rather than not doing anything at all

 

does me still feeling ****ty even after a while mean that i really was into her? for some reason i cant stop replaying it in my mind, and the fact that weve known each other for a while makes me seem like alot of my time was not put to good use (though we'll still be friends)

 

you guys think that moment will eventually fade away?

 

sorry for the long post and i feel weird even posting stuff like this on a forum site just b/c you never know who's watching lol (this is my first time ever posting something of this nature online)

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It will fade in time, but while it's lingering in your mind you may as well look upon it as a learning exercise.

 

On the whole, you most likely simply misinterpreted the signs. Some people are simply like that: more open, more tactile than others. It doesn't mean they're interested. They're usually a bit more initially reserved around people they don't know because of how often they will get unwanted attention because of it.

 

No fault here, from what I can see. As I said at first, just a learning experience, possibly for both of you.

 

Yea thanks, I mean the fact it keeps popping up in my head and hurts must show that I really liked her

 

Not tryin to make any excuses, but I sort of knew ahead of time she wasn't too into black guys at all (she's not white! Lol), but in the back of my mind, just that 1 percent, thought that'd maybe it'd be a chance.. and I've never put myself out there like that for a female before

 

What's done is done, but Let me ask you though, you think over break what I did is gonna be on the back of her mind? I wonder if girls actually still ponder on stuff like that

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You gave it try and thats cool. Don't feel sorry for yourself. Your story really isn't a friend zone story. To me a friend zone story involves a guy who is a bitch to a girl and just keeps being her friend even though he's miserable and wonders why she doesn't just date him. He wouldn't make a move like trying to kiss her, he'd just indirectly imply he likes her and wonder why she doesn't ask him out or make a move on him.

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You gave it try and thats cool. Don't feel sorry for yourself. Your story really isn't a friend zone story. To me a friend zone story involves a guy who is a bitch to a girl and just keeps being her friend even though he's miserable and wonders why she doesn't just date him. He wouldn't make a move like trying to kiss her, he'd just indirectly imply he likes her and wonder why she doesn't ask him out or make a move on him.

 

yea, i know what ya mean, but i got hit with that "dont wanna lose you as a good friend" text so i figure i might as well title the thread that lol

 

in honesty, im glad i took a reach like that, in the rain, felt like something from a movie, but in the movies, those things actually work... those last couple sentences you put wouldve described me had I not gone back to her and try to kiss her, and I know had I not gone to do it, I would've felt even worse than I do now tbh

 

the only thing is this girl was reallllly attractive, i mean to everyone she'd be, not many flaws at all. and I've known her a while, but just recently got to know more about her and realized i'd actually wanna date her, rather than just try to hit and leave it at that, thats why the rejection still hurts

 

only reason i feel like **** is b/c here I am, the very end of college, getting rejected from a really attractive girl i was cool with and spent a whole lot of time with... now its only so much time to get back out there

 

but let me ask you this, you think there is any sort of way to get out that zone at all? (were gonna see each other a little after break) or should i just keep movin on?

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If she's willing to hang out with you and you're not being some gay version of yourself around her sure theres a shot. You shouldn't put all your hopes into this. I'd try again. You can wear girls down. They think it's romantic in hind sight when it works out. Who cares if you get labeled a jerk lol

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If she's willing to hang out with you and you're not being some gay version of yourself around her sure theres a shot. You shouldn't put all your hopes into this. I'd try again. You can wear girls down. They think it's romantic in hind sight when it works out. Who cares if you get labeled a jerk lol

 

haha @ gay version, but anyways idk i may try that, its just im working on limited time since im almost done w/ college ya know? whats crazy is she wasnt too surprised at me running back towards her and trying to kiss her... and tbh, i wouldnt even feel bad whatsoever if i got a kiss on the lips and then rejected, wouldve been perfectly fine

 

to tell you the truth, no excuses, but i honestly think race has alot to do w/ it here, seeing as she never has gone out w/ someone my race, and grew up in a area where it wasnt too many people of my race, never mentioned any guys of my race as attractive.. you could just tell she was raised around a certain race, and thats cool, but i think she has a set preference. this is not even me in denial or anything, before this situation happened, me and my friends that knew her all thought that, i just thought maybe i could be the first one to change that ya know

 

other part is me not being upfront towards her as soon as we met. we studied together alot, had dinner alot (at the dorms, not out lol), but it was never anything obvious she did that signaled to me i was in a friendzone, i think it was just more of her knowing me for so long and me not doing anything, until, i guess now lol... i shouldve texted her and asked her had I made a move back then how would she have reacted

 

anyways, i know from now on to make my intentions known right upfront if I like someone, otherwise, playing the waiting game will get me crushed again and thinking about why I spent all that time with bottled up feelings smh

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todreaminblue
yea, i know what ya mean, but i got hit with that "dont wanna lose you as a good friend" text so i figure i might as well title the thread that lol

 

in honesty, im glad i took a reach like that, in the rain, felt like something from a movie, but in the movies, those things actually work... those last couple sentences you put wouldve described me had I not gone back to her and try to kiss her, and I know had I not gone to do it, I would've felt even worse than I do now tbh

 

the only thing is this girl was reallllly attractive, i mean to everyone she'd be, not many flaws at all. and I've known her a while, but just recently got to know more about her and realized i'd actually wanna date her, rather than just try to hit and leave it at that, thats why the rejection still hurts

 

only reason i feel like **** is b/c here I am, the very end of college, getting rejected from a really attractive girl i was cool with and spent a whole lot of time with... now its only so much time to get back out there

 

but let me ask you this, you think there is any sort of way to get out that zone at all? (were gonna see each other a little after break) or should i just keep movin on?

 

 

theres nothign wrong with having hope, when you are attracted to someone and you like them more every time you spend time together then i would say have hope.....you never know...

 

one thing i would say is be yourself around her if you can as open and charming as you can so she gets to see who you are.....allow her to make the move.....because she rejected you once already, allow her to decide whther she does want to get to know you more give her that respect....she realizes how you feel about her now you told her basically by running up to her....and doing what you did enough fro her to say i see you as a friend.....so if she does get to liek you more she should make that move....i always have hope in my heart until i have nothing to hope for...i hope alot..its my motto....' there is always hope until there is none"......smilin....hope you get your girl....write here and let us know..happy xmas.....deb

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