I don't like you now that I've slept with you?

[CXP]

Hey guys, I need some advice/opinions. I have a friend, A, whom I've known for years. We've been good friends - I think she even called us best friends. She happened to be marrying my other best friend, B. I've known them for what seems like forever, we shared many amazing memories, done lots of stupid stuff together, etc. etc. I haven't seen either of them in about a year, and was invited to their wedding as their best man. Despite the 2000 mile drive, I was ecstatic to go and do it.

 

We get to A & B's place, and one of the first things we do is party. The night wears on and we're all pretty intoxicated. B falls asleep on the couch, like he always does when he drinks. My girlfriend, C, basically says she thinks it would be pretty hot if A and I started fooling around. A and I pretty much look at each other, say "Okay," and start fooling around. It starts to get hot, and A starts freaking out she thinks she hears B. When it turns out to be the neighbors, we stop worrying, but decide we all better head to bed. C and I share an air mattress in B and A's bedroom, because there is no place else to put the air mattress.

 

We all lay in our respective beds and shut off the lights, when my C whispers in my ear, "Aren't you going to go get her off? She was getting close, and that's like blue balls for girls. Its pretty messed up."

 

In my drunken state I think, "Oh, man, I better go get her off. I don't want to leave her with blue balls." And drunkenly make my way over to A's bed, where I'm invited in. A and I start fooling around again. She starts really getting into it, and taking off her clothes.

 

"This will be really bad if B catches us. Do you even know how bad this would be?" She asks, while taking off her panties. After fooling around for another minute or two, she looks me in the eye and says, "We should totally do it."

 

I ponder this statement for a moment, letting it soak into my inebriated brain, before agreeing. She helps me coax my John Thomas into a suitably aroused state, and we 'do it.' She gets off twice, which I consider a miracle in my highly intoxicated and sexually retarded state. "That. Was. Amazing. Now go get back in your bed before B sees us!" She whispers to me. I dutifully go back to my air mattress to find that C was sound asleep.

 

The next morning I get up, to find B & A cuddling on the couch watching a movie. I happily greet them, and B jovially greets me back while A just glares at me. A and I start exchanging text messages, and basically, she's pissed off at me. I feel absolutely abominable, for sleeping with my best friend's fiance, in their apartment, in their bed, days before their wedding. With both my girlfriend and her boyfriend mere feet away. I don't know how much worse I could feel about it, but A seems determined to make it happen. For the entire time that I'm staying with them, A makes me feel as unwelcome as possible. She seems to have no interest whatsoever in being my friend any more, and may even border on hate. Where before we'd joke around, flirt nonseriously, and talk about anything and everything, now it's "Don't talk to me. I don't have anything to say to you. Go away."

 

What gives? I don't understand. Okay, we were both drunk, we both feel guilty about it. But it was her idea - why does she hate me for it?

 

Sorry for the run-on post..

[RA1]

I have to confess I found your story erotic!

 

I can't think of any rational reason why she should hate you for it when it was her idea. Maybe she wants to rewrite the story in her own mind so as to persuade herself it was all your fault, then she won't feel so guilty?

[carhill]

Gaslighting to effect plausible deniability. Next time keep Jimmy in his jacket and save yourself the grief. This is what *some* women do. You will never know when it's being done to you

[hoping2heal]

Firstly, the behavior was totally inappropriate PRIOR to the actual sex, so I doubt it's the sex alone that's causing the rude tude. Personally, I think she feels guilty and rather than take any responsibility for HER actions, she's blaming them all on you. Making you, the source of all her discontent. While, what you did was very very wrong, it doesn't make what she did any LESS wrong. I hope your friend doesn't marry this girl.

[The Blue Pill]

Yeah ^ what they said.

 

But I was totally turned on by your story... . It seems too epic to be true. You should write a book:laugh:

[CXP]

I have to confess I found your story erotic!

 

I can't think of any rational reason why she should hate you for it when it was her idea. Maybe she wants to rewrite the story in her own mind so as to persuade herself it was all your fault, then she won't feel so guilty?

 

I'll take that as a compliment, so thanks! I tried to keep it interesting enough to read while omitting all the graphic details and remaining vague.

 

A definitely seems immature enough to not want to take responsibility for her own actions, so this makes sense.

 

Next time keep Jimmy in his jacket and save yourself the grief.

 

This seems to me like sound advice. The problem would seem to be knowing when to keep it in your pants and when not to?

 

Firstly, the behavior was totally inappropriate PRIOR to the actual sex, so I doubt it's the sex alone that's causing the rude tude. Personally, I think she feels guilty and rather than take any responsibility for HER actions, she's blaming them all on you. Making you, the source of all her discontent. While, what you did was very very wrong, it doesn't make what she did any LESS wrong. I hope your friend doesn't marry this girl.

 

You make sense. I totally agree that what I did was very wrong, however I'd like to think that we were at least equally at fault. Either one of us could have said "No," at any time.

 

B and A did get married. After spending the week before the wedding with them, I came to the conclusion that it had terrible idea written all over it. That's a whole different can of worms that I'm not going to go into right now, but I have my doubts about how long their young marriage will last.

 

But I was totally turned on by your story... . It seems too epic to be true. You should write a book:laugh:

 

Thanks. It's true - I wrote the non-embellished version for the sake of accurate advice.

 

One thing I did forget to mention is that the morning after, my girlfriend and I were laying in bed talking, and it turned out that she didn't remember much of it at all. She fell asleep as soon as I got out of bed, so has no idea what happened. In fact, she said to me "I'm surprised you didn't f*** her, because I bet you could have." To which my oh-so-witty reply was "Haha. Umm. Yeah. I bet I could have." I'm still trying to decide what to tell her about the whole thing, or if I should just forget it.