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what should I do?


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I've been frineds with this guy for almost a year. He is pretty quiet, but for the last few months it seems that he has shown a romantic interest in me. He puts his arm around me and holds my hand and is really good to me, but he has never told me how he really feels about me. Like if he likes me in that way or not. I have had a crush on him for quite a while, and I am pretty sure he likes me as well.

Should I tell him how I feel about him, and risk our friendship, or should I wait and see if he ever makes a first move?

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I have a guy at college who has been doing this to me for 7 months, he still hasn't made his move.

 

I don't advise making the first move [God help me from Paul :) ]

But what you could do the next time he puts his arm around you or holds your hand is flirt and tease a bit, you could say something like "are you getting a crush on me....?" *giggle* *flirt* *friendly affection* *tease*

 

He may just need encouragement. Don't over do it though :) If he doesn't do anything after that, then just stay friends and look for romance elsewhere.

 

That may also wake him up but I wouldn't use it as a tactic. Just do it for your own happiness.

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I think it's a lot easier for a lady to attempt to upgrade a friendship than for a man. Males, generally, don't tend to go as bonkers when a lady makes such disclosures as do females when a man does such if they aren't inclined to be receptive to romance.

 

MercyRose's advice was very good and one of those instances may be the opportune time for talking about taking the friendship further. Communication is critical and some guys are extremely shy or hesitant in situations like this. I would just come right out and tell him..."hey, why don't we start going to date dates" or something to that effect.

 

Now, there are men who might let this go over their head. That's because they are scared of the situation, although quite happy at the same time. Many men have gone over this in their mind repeatedly, trying to figure out just how to pull it off. Then, when you make an overture, it takes them by surprise and presents a scenario they may not have considered in their thoughts. So they may not react right away because they were surprised and unprepared...as difficult as this may be to understand.

 

So if that happens, just wait...and give it another go the next time.

 

You'd be surprised at just how many men are really courageous in a lot of situations...but when it comes to the opposite sex, they just freeze.

 

You may also be surprised at the number of males who fall for their female friends in a big way...and just have no clue whatsoever on how to make this disclosure. My feeling is most do not...it's sort of sad.

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By Tony - You may also be surprised at the number of males who fall for their female friends in a big way...and just have no clue whatsoever on how to make this disclosure. My feeling is most do not...it's sort of sad. - So True!

 

I agree that you should be more playful, have fun with the situation and see how he reacts. If that does not work than you will have to have a talk about it. He obviously feels real close to you. Its a good time to get to the bottom of it.

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