Modern Dating - Is it really this hard!

[Janet Woodhouse]

I moved cities a couple of years ago to go back to university after coming out of a very serious long-term relationship (9 years). Now that I’ve graduated and feel properly ready to date again, I thought I’d give the apps a go… and honestly, they’re the worst! I’ve never used them before, and whilst I know people who’ve found wonderful partners through them, everyone I’ve met has been… not my kind of person, to put it nicely. It all feels so impersonal, and it’s hard to really know who you’re meeting.

I love living in my new city, I’ve made some amazing friends, and I feel really happy with who I am after a lot of personal growth. But I have no idea how to actually meet someone romantically in real life! Is it just really difficult to date at 30? How do people meet outside of the apps?

Would love to hear other people’s experiences?

[MsJayne]

Dating apps - ugh. My own experience of them was that a profile rarely matched the person and, with men, most of them overstate their credentials and many outright lie about themselves and their character, whether intentionally or not. For example, I learned that when men refer to themselves as "passionate" it often means "overbearing", or "playful" can mean "annoying", etc. The internet has created 'disposable romance' and while a relative few people may get lucky on apps and meet Mr or Ms Right, I think it's way more common for people to end up feeling jaded and disappointed from Jerk Overload. I have no solution for this, but I do think that genuine people are starting to turn away from apps and look for other ways to meet potential partners, such as singles events, sporting interests or hobbies, and regular old-fashioned socialising.