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Why people have such fantasy?


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Springsummer

Swiping on bed in the morning. Here is another profile saying a happily married couple looking for a third female to fulfills three some fantasy.

It is mind boggling to me why people have such fantasy. It is so strange to me. What's the fun in it? I don't understand at all. For me, I don't even like the guy to touch anybody else.

Anybody here understand the fantasy?

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No I don't understand the fantasy.

I wouldn't do very well with sharing a partner. 

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Emilie Jolie
4 hours ago, Springsummer said:

Anybody here understand the fantasy?

Yeah. I mean at a push I'd prefer another guy, but I get it. I like to keep it a fantasy though; not sure I'd actually want to go through with it, unless the SO can clone himself.

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Blind-Sided

It's fun.  In my life... when I was younger... I had that happen.  We were at a friends house during a party, and me, my GF, and one of her friends (f) wound up at my house when my folks were gone. (I was probably 19 or 20 at the time)  It was a total blast, and it only ever happened once.  There wasn't even any strange feelings with the other girl when she finally had a new BF.  We all hung out still.

BUT... if @major_merrick will chime in... I'm guessing she can give some good insight on this. (Love her stories, LOL)

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Just a Guy

Hi, have'nt you guys heard of swinging, partner swapping, Hotwifing, Cuckolding etc? In comparison Threesomes are tame I presume. By the way, let me clarify that I have no such fantasies and of course no experience in any of it. However, with the internet throwing out stuff everyday and innumerable print articles and TV programs this kind of thing is almost in your face. This forum deals with Infidelity and there is not much difference in the mindset which propels people to cheat on their spouses as the Fantasy couples entertain on having threesomes and more domes and so on. The difference is that whereas cheating is a unilateral decision taken by one selfish partner in a relationship, these fantasies are generally shared ones where both partners are on the same page. I believe one of the posters on this forum, Central, will be able to shed more light on this topic. I am not certain but I believe Sigmund Freud has been quoted as saying that the human mind is capable of creating myriads of sexual scenarios and the only thing odd would be a mind devoid of all sexual thought and imagery. Always remember, "One man's meat is another man's poison"! What works for you may not for someone else and vice versa. Best wishes.

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major_merrick

@Blind-Sided  Well, since you asked....

I wouldn't want to simply share a partner.  I will pass on the swinging idea since I am still somewhat possessive.  But a relationship with multiple partners is very nice.  One person doesn't have to meet 100% of your needs.  And you can get together to give pleasure to one partner, or sometimes be the focus of attention yourself.  More choices than monogamy.  And the sleep is even better than the sex. I curl up in a nice cozy place with all my partners in one bed.  Never slept so comfortably or securely in my life.

 

 

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Gr8fuln2020

I can understand it, but personally too selfish to share my partner with someone else. 

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My friend from Hungary has told me that although she has a steady boyfriend, he would never be enough to satisfy her sexually,

she has "a voracious sex drive" and needs at least two other playmates on the go,

threesomes is something she is open too also I believe,

she is actually the sweetest friendliest woman you could ever meet, I was probably a little shell shocked when first hearing how open she would talk, but good for me to learn😊

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Been there, done that many times. Why? Because it can be MUCH more exciting and fulfilling with two partners; there can be additional positions, variations, stimuli, combinations, etc. Many women enjoy other women, or two men. Many men would love to have two women make him the center of attention. And many variations on that.

Some of our most intense and memorable sexual experiences have involved a third person. This in no way negates the wonderful times with just the two of us.

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IndigoNight

For most people, it is best left as a fantasy.  In a relationship that opens the bedroom to a third person,  someone often feels left out, or like they are getting less attention.  It causes anger and hurt feelings, which aren't generally beneficial in a relationship. Relationships have ended over a 3way.

The best case scenario for a 3some is 3 friends/acquaintances mutually exchanging pleasure. There is no jealousy,  no worries about how it will change a loved ones feelings. It's just fulfilling a fantasy with people you trust, who also trust you, abs rarely are strings attached. That's a different kink.  😉

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major_merrick
On ‎5‎/‎24‎/‎2020 at 1:17 PM, Gr8fuln2020 said:

I can understand it, but personally too selfish to share my partner with someone else. 

 

12 hours ago, IndigoNight said:

For most people, it is best left as a fantasy.  In a relationship that opens the bedroom to a third person,  someone often feels left out, or like they are getting less attention. 

Jealousy is DEFINITELY an issue for most.  In my situation, it is in a committed (and closed) multi-partner relationship.  Relationships don't last long with outside influences coming in.  I've never done any kind of swinging or inviting others into a relationship, nor would I want to.  I'm somewhat jealous in my own way!  Within a closed, multi-partner relationship I find having 3 or more partners to be my pest possible long-term situation.  I wasn't made for monogamy, or for permanently playing the field.

One interesting thing about 3+ partners is watching your partners' sexuality.  For example, my GF#1 tends to be soft, sweet, and innocent-ish even when her desire is going crazy.  But now that she's my husband's Wife #5 too.... I see a totally different side of her: Uncontrolled, insatiable, raw, and much more adult.  I find it unexpected and fascinating, and while I like to participate I also enjoy just watching them. 

A great side benefit of multi-partner sex is that it removes inhibitions.  When you're having sex with one or two partners and someone else can join in, you lose some of that selfish possessiveness about your own body.  I dislike using the word "no" in a sexual relationship.  The more inhibitions you remove, the less likely you are to want to deny your partner and the less embarrassment you feel.  Looking back, one of the best moments of my life was my wedding night...where I conceived my first daughter in front of my partners and on film. 

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Some people are curious and really want to seek novelty in the form of sex with someone else. From that it's not as much of a bow to draw to suggest that both people in a relationship are keen to try that novelty. It's a better outcome than outright cheating, at least in the short term.

Of course, many people (in fact, it seems to be the vast majority) are very possessive of their partners and want them all to themselves. Not that it's a bad thing (it's why we have monogamous relationships as the norm in the first place), but it doesn't necessarily apply to everyone.

With the endless types of kinks that are out there I feel that you don't need to understand why people have any kind of fantasy - they are just there. The trick is to find someone with similar fantasies (or lack thereof) to you.

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Springsummer

I have always associated exclusivity with love, commitment and morality.

 

 

 

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