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that is part of why i am so against western society & mentality

Out of curiosity, what society is your ideal, then?

 

How did you get those glasses, anyway? And where do you get the food that you eat each day? And where did the shelter under which you sleep come from? Were they provided somehow?

 

So if you had a choice, to choose your ideal society, what would that look like? How would you get your food each day? How would you provide shelter for this woman you hope to share your life with, and don't forget food, shelter, and protection from threats (natural and human) for any children as well. What does your ideal society look like, if it's not the one that you are currently against?

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  • 2 weeks later...
FredRutherford
That's a pretty strong statement and generalization to say you hate American girls. I'm getting the impression you've had a fair share of rejection from them, and some have not been all too nice about it, and you're starting to turn against them as a result. Kind of like some of the men on this board who have become bitter and start to think pursuing women from a different country would have better results. I would suggest, rather than taking that route, that you work on some things that might help your success with women.

Sound advice here, Kathy.

There are many bitter men, but they often have reason for it.

However, women aren't attracted to bitterness and negativity.

So guys... try to ditch any attitude. It won't help you.

 

If you think about it, what attracts women and gets their interest are along the lines of great personality, attractive appearance, interesting/fun hobbies and interests, good conversationalist, good character and values. Maybe there are some things you could improve upon.

 

You sound like your character and values are good ones, but maybe you could work on your personality a bit? Are you upbeat and confident? Are you friendly and engaging to people in general? If not, those are things you can work on.

Social interaction often helps. Do things with friends, male and female, and get used to interacting with people.

 

You can update your appearance a bit too. You said you are 27 years old, but from your picture, you look much younger. I would suggest leaving the glasses at home if at all possible, and using them only when you reallly need them, like for driving, reading, etc., or get contact lenses if that is possible. Also, it's time to update the hair style. It's too youthful for your age. Go to a unisex salon and ask the stylist for opinions on what hair style would go well for a 27 year old.

This might be good, Joey.

Am not saying you look bad or anything (I'm not a gal), but we single guys usually don't have any idea how we appear to women.

 

Ask some female relatives (cousins?) to give you their take on your appearance.

They may be able to provide some "fashion" tips as well as I hadn't a clue on what clothes look good when I was single.

 

 

You can also work on your sense of humor--that is a quality that draws people to someone.

Having a sense of humor is critical to dating.

You don't have to be a joke-teller, but women are attracted to guys who can lighten-up and possess a carefree attitude.

 

Do you know how some people develop their sense of humor? They read joke books and funny articles. Some even take comedy classes to develop that aspect of themselves that doesn't come naturally to them.

If you're not good at telling jokes, wouldn't advise that. (I'm not good at telling jokes).

But try to inject some humor into situations where possible.

 

As members of this church singles group I was involved with @26 entered this restaurant, an infant was screaming.

In front of some of the single gals, made this crack:

"...Makes you wanna rush right into parenthood..."

They all chuckled and that light-heartedness displayed something about me.

 

Women are attracted to calm, cool, confident guys who are comfortable with their world, their lives and others' lives.

 

 

Develop your hobbies and interests, and pursue some things that girls would find appealing about you. Develop your conversational skills and read up on a variety of topics so you can hold a woman's interest in that way.

Read the book, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. It shows you how to strike-up conversation with anyone on just about any topic.

You can download a free PDF of the classic book that helped me a lot.

 

You may also want to ask someone you know IRL what you might do differently so that you would have more success with women.

Prime advice.
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JoeyArnold
you should consider getting contact lenses

kathy, do you know how blind i am?

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kathy, do you know how blind i am?

I understand you can't see well and need your glasses. I thought if there was a possibility you only needed them for certain things, like driving or reading, you could see well enough at other times to go without. That's what I do, since I don't like wearing them, but my eyesight is pretty decent without them. But you are saying you can't see much without them, so that's why I suggested getting contact lenses once you get a job. I think it will go a long way towards improving your appearance to women. That, and a more updated haircut. All of the men I know look better without glasses, and many of them have gotten contact lenses. It does make a difference in your appearance, and your appearance is a factor in whether women will have an interest in you. It is not the only factor, of course, but it is a factor for just about everybody.

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iambookworm
Heed all warnings here Joey.

 

I pretty much know these women as one was in our life for a few years.

 

She had already come into the country through her husband, and they separated because it was said she gambled all his money. But she said it was because she didn't get along w the mother-in-law. ha

 

I got to know her and several of her Filipino girlfriends who came into the country under the same circumstances.

 

They seek marriage, and rather married or not they hold the partner hostage to send money to their families and also prop their foot up against your door - to bring their family (and friends) in to live with you.

 

Aside from descending on you to take care of them and their families, they were about partying, gambling, and even cheating on their husbands.

 

Not into working, but if they do: The money they receive is theirs and not to help with living expenses.

 

It's not about you Joey - they will grab anyone who vaguely reaches out to them.

 

It's easy to get on the internet and reach out to these LD relationships, but you just don't get to really know them - and it can waste or ruin your life.

 

Don't generalize please. I know a lot of them who are really nice.

 

To the OP, don't do it. Not because of her nationality, but if, at this point, she is trying to tell you what to do and what not to do, she might get even more controlling later on.

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JoeyArnold
I understand you can't see well and need your glasses. I thought if there was a possibility you only needed them for certain things, like driving or reading, you could see well enough at other times to go without

 

I had glasses since I was around the age of one years old. I have really thick glasses. I have difficult seeing things that are far away and things that are close up. Sometimes when I take off my glasses, people would beg me to put them back on. One of my eyes is bigger than the other because the skin of the bottom eye lid drips or hangs. I could get an operation if I had a bunch of money. I think my dad had an operation when he was a kid because it was so bad. We also had ear tubes for hearing until I was around ten. I also have a small chin and my tongue might be too small and just my mouth and the shape of my face might be oddly shape due to a disease or something I think.

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FredRutherford
I had glasses since I was around the age of one years old. I have really thick glasses. I have difficult seeing things that are far away and things that are close up. Sometimes when I take off my glasses, people would beg me to put them back on. One of my eyes is bigger than the other because the skin of the bottom eye lid drips or hangs. I could get an operation if I had a bunch of money. I think my dad had an operation when he was a kid because it was so bad. We also had ear tubes for hearing until I was around ten. I also have a small chin and my tongue might be too small and just my mouth and the shape of my face might be oddly shape due to a disease or something I think.

Joey,

I don't know anything about glasses and would be the last to give good advice on looks, and what to do to "look good" to appeal to women.

 

Why I advised this earlier...

 

Ask some female relatives (cousins?) to give you their take on your appearance.

They may be able to provide some "fashion" tips as well as I hadn't a clue on what clothes look good when I was single.

 

 

Guys, esp. ones living by ourselves as you and I did, really need another perspective.

If you have a female cousin or friend or another guy that can give you some advice..... think it might help.

A woman's view might also be good on wearing glasses, changing glasses, etc.

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pureinheart
don't even go there, it's very likely she is a scam artist, and if she isn't, she's probably a control freak.

 

she told me my facebook profile was too old & that some of my pictures & videos are immature & should be removed & that i should check with her before adding new pictures.

 

bingo......

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JoeyArnold
bingo......

do you know how many scam artists i have ran into?

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I had glasses since I was around the age of one years old. I have really thick glasses. I have difficult seeing things that are far away and things that are close up. Sometimes when I take off my glasses, people would beg me to put them back on. One of my eyes is bigger than the other because the skin of the bottom eye lid drips or hangs. I could get an operation if I had a bunch of money. I think my dad had an operation when he was a kid because it was so bad. We also had ear tubes for hearing until I was around ten. I also have a small chin and my tongue might be too small and just my mouth and the shape of my face might be oddly shape due to a disease or something I think.

I'm sorry to hear that you are dealing with those things, Joey. From your picture in your avatar, it looks like you have some nice blue eyes. It's hard to give you advice on attracting women just based on your avatar and what you post here, since there is so much information we can't possibly know on here, such as how you interact with people, etc. I would agree with Fred, that your best bet is to ask a women, such as a relative or friend, what you might do to improve your chances to find a gf. I do think your best bet is to find someone from church groups and religious events, since they are more apt to appreciate your heart for God and your character, and those are your strongest points, and of course, that is the type of women you are looking for anyway. But I did want to suggest that you do whatever you can in the other areas of your life to improve your chances. Even Christian women do care about other things as well as your faith, such as your life goals, your interests, your personality, etc. So I concur with Fred, that you should ask a woman who knows you in real life as to what you might do to improve your chances, since they would have a much more accurate picture of everything about you.

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JoeyArnold
it's hard to give you advice on attracting women just based on your avatar and what you post here, since there is so much information we can't possibly know on here, such as how you interact with people, etc

 

what do you not know about me? The Youtube of JoeyArnold7 - YouTube Joey Arnold | Facebook http://MeaOmnia.com

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FredRutherford
that is why i do not like it when people say i keep secrets from the public.... The Youtube of JoeyArnold7 - YouTube Joey Arnold | Facebook Mea Omnia

Most of us wouldn't use our real names.

Maybe would use our first or middle names (I frequently communicate with people via PMs using my middle name) but not both names. You got guts.

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Well, I don't use Facebook, and I can't access more than just the youtube link. I know very little about you and how you come across to people IRL, so I would suggest, as Fred had suggested, that you ask a trusted female friend or relative what you might do to improve your appeal to women, and like I mentioned before, work on getting that job or future career, because that is important to women if you have ambition and ability to support yourself and a potential family. You can also work on your hobbies and interests, your social skills, expand your social circle by becoming involved in more things.

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JoeyArnold
ask a trusted female friend or relative what you might do to improve your appeal to women

that is what i do and am doing already before already and right now right here. if you are not on facebook then you are missing out. there is no difference between forum websites and facebook and social media websites and websites in general. i had the story of my life on a public website before. i make everything i do on facebook open to the public. if i really did not want everybody to know about it then it wouldnt be on the internet at all because i am not sure if privacy even exists on the internet, so why even try. i have heard that they store everything that happens online in secret super computer warehouses all around the world..... so i see no use in trying to keep secrets..... even if you delete something, it is still there somewhere... you cannot hide.... you cannot run

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