stillafool Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 Because we're taught to do that at a young age. Remember that video we all had to watch in like the 5th grade? Well the girls video included a portion that went like this: Men like competition, make them chase you Men don't like women that are easy Men don't like the low lying fruit, they like the big shiny apple at the top of the tree Men like to pursue, if they don't have to pursue they get lazy and won't like you so much Play hard to get If you throw yourself at a man he'll think you're desperate Always leave the ball in his court Men don't want what is too readily available Men like to conquer Any other questions? (Sorry, hope you take this message as intented. Half serious, half joking) :lmao:So true! Also never call them or they will think you have no life and are desperate. They want the "chase".
stillafool Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 oh yes, there's an end game to it. I think that's what hard to get is all about - keeping attraction levels high enough to determine whether you're some kinda match, or not, before jumping the gun & getting all emo over some person who isn't good for you. QUOTE] I agree with this. I have heard other friends of mine say that the longer 'the pursuing' goes on, the best chances you have of being in a relationship in the end. Because during the pursuing/chasing part, the guy is realizing just how much he likes the girl, and that will sustain the beginning of the relationship. If the girl chases the guy and doesn't give him his space, then he doesn't have the time to miss her and realize how much he likes her, because she's smothering him. Therefore he may get tired of her instead of missing her and realizing how much he likes her. I have heard that men need that distance to create that attachment. They have the distance if/when the girl is playing hard to get. Just a thought, take it for what it is Always worked for me. The longer the chase the higher the attraction.
meerkat stew Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 The longer the chase the higher the attraction. Sure, for weak men without options. For attracting men who are aware of their value and have options, "playing hard to get" behavior from a woman is just a signal that it's time to add another option into the bucket, as one apple has shown rotten.
MrNate Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 I still don't understand. Why do we need to play these sorts of games again? I rather not initiate every text/call. Why? The answer is extremely simple. It helps to know if she's interested in you, and not just replying to be nice. Proper, courteous reciprocation is always a good thing. I would hope men and women have the ability to communicate in a moderate fashion without coming across as desperate. The End.
Mad Max Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 :lmao:So true! Also never call them or they will think you have no life and are desperate. They want the "chase". BS. Everytime a girl did that with me, I immediately moved on. The person that loses out is you.
Bogo123 Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 Yep. They were blowing up my phone right up until we went out & they figured out I dug them also then they play the "busy" game. Is this what usually happens? After a few dates and they know you like them, then they start becoming too busy? This happened to me recently and she just stopped initiating any conversation, although she did in the beginning. How do u know whether to continue pursuing or if she lost interest? I haven't contacted her in 3 weeks and she obviously never contacted me.
phineas Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 Is this what usually happens? After a few dates and they know you like them, then they start becoming too busy? This happened to me recently and she just stopped initiating any conversation, although she did in the beginning. How do u know whether to continue pursuing or if she lost interest? I haven't contacted her in 3 weeks and she obviously never contacted me. ok, 3 weeks means she lost interest i'd say. For me, if I ask them to do something & it's almost a certainty their "busy". Their also masters at alluding their "business" for the rest of the week. I'll usually get call from them while their on their way to doing something in the car & I give them about 15 mins. then tell them I have to go. They do have time late at night (even weekend nights when i'm always home with my kids) to naughty text back & forth which tells me they either weren't on a date that night or if they were it must not of been a great date because their either done with it and home or their texting me during it. LOL! It's a game. Meerkat mentioned in another thread I should add another woman into the mix & I think I will. My friends are taking me out for a divorce party next weekend. I think it's the perfect time to hit on every single chick in the bar.
Sphere Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 There's a difference between "playing hard to get" and "saying your busy when you aren't". If a woman is stringing you along then that's different which is what the last page or two focuses on. If a woman says she is busy when she isn't and starts cancelling plans and whatever else then I'll ring around another woman and forget about that, she'll go on the backburner which is why it is important that in dating stage you keep all options open and make yourself available to capitalize on those options/potential options. Never place all of your eggs into one basket, that goes for everything you do life including women/dating.
phineas Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 There's a difference between "playing hard to get" and "saying your busy when you aren't". If a woman is stringing you along then that's different which is what the last page or two focuses on. If a woman says she is busy when she isn't and starts cancelling plans and whatever else then I'll ring around another woman and forget about that, she'll go on the backburner which is why it is important that in dating stage you keep all options open and make yourself available to capitalize on those options/potential options. Never place all of your eggs into one basket, that goes for everything you do life including women/dating. In my case they don't cancel. They always meet with me when we plan. Once a week is fine for me right now but it's more like every other week with a few texts here & there in between meet ups. it could be my divorce that's a factor. lawyer says judge approved everything. i'm just waiting for my lawyer to tell me my divorce is a matter of public record. From listening to the two of them a lot of married guys hit on them & don't hide the fact their married when they do it. which boggles my mind. So maybe their waiting for the papers to be in my hand & just not telling me for some reason.
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