doomage Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 So after about three weeks after the girl i was dating told me "i dont like you leave me alone" after she had lost interest a week prior i contacted her last night on a whim by text message. This is how it went: me:hey you popped into my head. How are you? her: I've been good. me:ya me too thanks for asking (jp lol) except im sick now. whats new with you? her:still the same. my car is overheating. me: oh its still doin that. hows school going done for the semester? her:yea last day today i passed me: oh snapz congratz. didn't mean to rhymelol how long do you have a break for? her: 3 weeks me:cool beans. ha alright well i gotta go so we'll talk later sweet dreams and she never replied to that which is cool i mean overall she was kinda cold which i sort of expected but i dont feel so desperate as before, im cool with giving her space and i dont need to contact her every day. i dont wanna mention hanging out with her yet because that got me in trouble after she lost interest and made her say leave me alone. What should i do from now on?
BobSacamento Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 Pretty casual. I'd keep it like that. Kind of tease her interest. Perhaps you'll get lucky and one day/night she'll be lonely. That is when you strike!
kalikula Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 Omg... She said "I don't like you leave me alone" Leave her alone then!! For good!
Author doomage Posted August 18, 2010 Author Posted August 18, 2010 She said that most likely because i annoyed the piss out of her by always asking to hang out when we had stopped dating a week prior, and since i was on desperation mode i kept wanting to meet up and even though shes a nice girl i pushed her to say that. Well i gave it some time and hit her up last night and atleast she responded back but now i have to be the guy i was when she met me, not the clingy pussified guy i became at the end of our dating stint lol. About keeping it casual should i contact her every once in a couple days and not even talka bout hanging out or what?
Cracker Jack Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 I'm surprised you're still even contacting her. Did the last topic open your eyes to anything? Not trying to be mean, but it just seems like you're refusing to take advice. From now in, simply don't contact her at all. You're wasting your time on this one.
USMCHokie Posted August 18, 2010 Posted August 18, 2010 About keeping it casual should i contact her every once in a couple days and not even talka bout hanging out or what? Keeping it casual as in don't talk to her again...she's not the only girl in this world, dude...
Author doomage Posted August 18, 2010 Author Posted August 18, 2010 ya but idk even after that time apart i still would think of her a couple of times, i mean i've been going out trying to meet new girls, and improve my social life and stuff, and i know there are other hotter women than her, and stuff but i keep thinking about the good times, with her. But i mean it seems like im playing myself since she didn't seem too enthusiastic with the conversation last night. i feel i can go no contact but i guess i wanted to give it a last shot to see if something would come about this.
USMCHokie Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 Anybody have anymore advice There's no point...you don't even listen to the advice that has been repeatedly given to you...sorry, but I don't think anyone can, in good conscience, tell you what you want to here...
WTRanger Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 ya but idk even after that time apart i still would think of her a couple of times, i mean i've been going out trying to meet new girls, and improve my social life and stuff, and i know there are other hotter women than her, and stuff but i keep thinking about the good times, with her. But i mean it seems like im playing myself since she didn't seem too enthusiastic with the conversation last night. i feel i can go no contact but i guess i wanted to give it a last shot to see if something would come about this. And then one more shot, then another final shot, then another final-final shot, the a last ditch effort shot, then the "This is the last shot, shot", then another shot..... Do I even need to continue? Look at her answers. Short, concise, not ever asking about you. Does that strike you as someone who would hang out with you?
Author doomage Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 when you put it that way apparently not lol...i mean it was pretty much a one sided conversation, the fact that she replied to me kind of made me assume that the game was still on.... but now after re reading what i wrote and the advice given, is that it really is over, and im better off deleting her number and improving myself further.
Green Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 You never listen to my advice. Did you even ever KISS this girl on the LIPS when you were suposedly DATING her? My advice is no small talk with this girl... just ask her out on dates... Also you need to be TRYING with other girls. You can't get tunnel vision for this ONE girl who probably doesn't like you. HIT ON MANY GIRLS 1) flirt 2) ask out 3) KISS on the date. Follow my plan with as many girls as you can starting now I want updates So remind me again... did you ever KISS the girl in this thread?
Author doomage Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 I'm not one to kiss and tell but since it's online well ya i kissed her five minutes after meeting her and we messed around that same night, and when we started dating we had sex the first date and plenty more of that throughout, she really liked me at first, but when i brought up relationship talk she kept thinking about it and second guessd it cuz it was too soon, i sort of jumped the gun, and slowly after that she lost interest because i wasnt the same guy she met that night at the house party. I could tell she was distancing herself and instead of handling it like a man i choded out and became insecure, and she must have lost respect for me and therefore attraction diminished.
Green Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 well good for you! but seriously stop focusing so much on this ONE girl who doesn't care for you. HIT ON MORE GIRLS get a few girls going... then you will have no trouble finding one who wants to comit to a seriouse relationship. You get a cool new state of mind when you date more then one girl at a time.
Author doomage Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 YUp Green, i know i need more options whether single or dating or whatever, because around the 3 week mark i start digging the girl way more than she is me and i shoot myself in the foot and get one-itis, for them. So for future reference even if i am dating one girl im still gonna be out there meeting other chicks and people to just have a normal social life, so i will not be sucked into the girls social life like this girl here, and ill be much busier because of it.
USMCHokie Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 This appears to be a classic case of a one night stand where one party is trying to turn it into something more...just because you had sex, it doesn't mean that you have to be dating...it seems like she only saw it as such and doesn't want anything more to do with you...yet you are forcing the issue... Leave her alone...and leave it at that...you had sex once with her...that's all she seems to have wanted from you...
Green Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 YUp Green, i know i need more options whether single or dating or whatever, because around the 3 week mark i start digging the girl way more than she is me and i shoot myself in the foot and get one-itis, for them. So for future reference even if i am dating one girl im still gonna be out there meeting other chicks and people to just have a normal social life, so i will not be sucked into the girls social life like this girl here, and ill be much busier because of it. See you already know what you do wrong... you just can't seem to stop bad habits of focusing in on one girl who isn't ready for that yet. I want you to hit on every attractive girl you see tomorrow. Remember if you do it in a respectful way they will be complimented when you ask them out even if they say "no" you will still have made their day.
Green Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 was she only like the first or second girl you slept with doomage?
USMCHokie Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 was she only like the first or second girl you slept with doomage? This is a great point, Green. I remember I was unnecessarily hung up on the first girl I slept with that was only meant to be a one night hookup 1000 miles from home...seems to be what's happening here with doomage...
Author doomage Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 nah this is the 6th girl i've slept with, but the thing was that i hardly go to house parties and im still new to being good with women, so i didnt expect to get so far with this girl in one night, i mean we didn't have sex that night, as i didnt have a condom but she gave me oral, and she thought i was never gonna call her again, but i did because i was curious about her and thought she was cool or whatever, and hot. So we dated but around 3 weeks i jumped the gun and asked her out, and she got cold feet and started acting wierd then said one day that she wasnt ready for one since she had been single for long and her exes treated her bad or whatever, and she said i reminded her of a clingy ex of hers and i said iw asnt clingy and i proved her right by acting like a insecure douche at the end of it all. Yea i know what it is i do wrong but for some reason i have no self control when it comes to doing the right thing, for instance the day that she was being disrespectful by neglecting my plans with her to hang with her firends i ended up going to meet her at her friends when my intuition said not to because no good would come of it, and since i went i made the situation worse.
xpaperxcutx Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 Okay, Doomage, your behaviour is creeping me out, and we're not even dating. You need to back the wa---y off this girl. There is no game to be played with her because she's not interested. Just her messages alone screams " why is this guy still texting me? Leave me alone!" Yes, you are clingy but I'm guessing you're just really bad at accepting rejection. Go with Green's advice and start asking out every other girl you find attractive. The more you acquaint yourself with the moves of the field the better you'll be at dating girls without getting too attached.
Author doomage Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 so should i delete her off my facebook and myspace, and delete her number? i mean the only way it would be cool to talk to her now is if she initiated conversation with me, because if im doing it im jus grasping at straws basically. She didnt give me much to work with last night compared to how we used to talk.
Green Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 This is a great point, Green. I remember I was unnecessarily hung up on the first girl I slept with that was only meant to be a one night hookup 1000 miles from home...seems to be what's happening here with doomage... Yeah that first girl I slept with made me cry like a little baby bitch when she dumped me. so should i delete her off my facebook and myspace, and delete her number? i mean the only way it would be cool to talk to her now is if she initiated conversation with me, because if im doing it im jus grasping at straws basically. She didnt give me much to work with last night compared to how we used to talk. Do what ever you think is best. Just start asking out other girls... soon... today!
Author doomage Posted August 19, 2010 Author Posted August 19, 2010 that was my greatest moment when i went up to her because i was so confident that night idk how that happened, but i wanna get to that place again, lately i've been scared to approach girls, where at one point i didnt give a crap and could do it, but now im back to square one. any pointers?
somedude81 Posted August 19, 2010 Posted August 19, 2010 Wow, it's amazing how guys who seem to not have a clue what they are doing seem to get girls. And this is the sixth girl he's slept with, unfreaking believable!
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