shygal1 Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 My bf and I have been fighting for two weeks. He ignores me for hours and days at a time. Then when I react because I am emotional he says my texts are phsycotic. I kno he gets them. We talked he said he loved me an things were fine again. Few days later I text he ignored. I limited it to 3 texts. He Then said sorry he's been sick. On his facebook I saw he went out and I flippe out. Sent 30 texts and no answer. What to I do I threatened I would go to his house. He will not respond. It's so disrespectful. I havnt seen him in over a week. Why do men ignore and not say anything.
temporaryvisa Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Uh...Because you're being nuts. Men want to feel like the woman they have is a prize, right? If you are being emotional and clingy, and sending 30 texts, it seems like a burden, right?
Author shygal1 Posted August 16, 2010 Author Posted August 16, 2010 Well he lied. That's not ok. And u can't ignore a partner for days at a time. Clingy ?? He's my boyfriend. That's what a relationship is communication.
Author shygal1 Posted August 16, 2010 Author Posted August 16, 2010 He has no reason not to answer. I rather be dumped then not respected, and to ignore is so disrespectful.
temporaryvisa Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Well he lied. That's not ok. And u can't ignore a partner for days at a time. Clingy ?? He's my boyfriend. That's what a relationship is communication. You should tell us your whole story instead of just emotional outbursts...
Sphere Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Why not play him at his own game? He's ignoring you, you should do the same. If he values the relationship he'll make the first move, if not just take that a sign he wants nothing to do with you, dump him via text and find someone else who isn't a complete moron.
Thierro Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Why not play him at his own game? He's ignoring you, you should do the same. If he values the relationship he'll make the first move, if not just take that a sign he wants nothing to do with you, dump him via text and find someone else who isn't a complete moron. Don't counter attack with the same stupid games, otherwise you have two stubborn kids fighting it out in a useless manner. Don't accept behavior like that. Tell him this. Don't get affected by it. He is ignorant and needs to grow up. Stop the darn power games. But you need some work too, Shy. You seem too clingy. And 30 texts? Come on. Be a big girl and stop needing so much validation from others.
Sphere Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 She has had it out with him and he has just ignored her concerns and carried on regardless. This to me is selfish behaviour and is unacceptable. She has tried to communicate and sort things out and he is still behaving like a moron, therefore it is perfectly acceptable for her to follow my advice instead of chasing after someone who is too immature to be in a relationship in the first place.
ReadyforLove Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 He has no reason not to answer. I rather be dumped then not respected, and to ignore is so disrespectful. Why are you going to sit around and wait to be dumped? You need to take matters into your own hands. You have said that he has lied to you, he is disrespectful to you, he blatantly ignores you for days on end. Is this the type of person you want to be in a relationship with?
a_woman Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 He has no reason not to answer. I rather be dumped then not respected, and to ignore is so disrespectful. he doesn't know how to handle you. sounds like you get quite angry and he doesn't know what to do with that. 30 texts? is that the exact number? that's scary
Author shygal1 Posted August 16, 2010 Author Posted August 16, 2010 Well over a few days it adds up. I love him so it's hard to deal with when he's like this. He usually aplologizes afterwards which sucks me back in
torranceshipman Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 You need to step back. A couple of well worded texts or a call once a day is enough. 30 is a bit crazy, and if they are all emotional and angry, he will not want to communicate with you at all. Of course lying isn't ok nor is ignoring your texts, but sending him 30 emotional angry messages is also not ok. If I were you I'd step WAY back and let him feel the change - let him chase you.
denise_xo Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Ignore him. And put some moderation on the amount of texts you send him.
Art_Critic Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 You need to step back. A couple of well worded texts or a call once a day is enough. 30 is a bit crazy, and if they are all emotional and angry, he will not want to communicate with you at all. Of course lying isn't ok nor is ignoring your texts, but sending him 30 emotional angry messages is also not ok. If I were you I'd step WAY back and let him feel the change - let him chase you. Totally agree.. By the way.. 5 texts -Okay 10 texts -A little weird 15 Texts -A little crazy and WTF? 30 texts.. a whole lot of crazy and never speak to again. You ask why we ignore.. It is the right thing to do to ignore someone who sends 20 texts let alone 30.. and you threatened to stalk him too.. I guess your not so shy after all
Author shygal1 Posted August 16, 2010 Author Posted August 16, 2010 Thanks I'll try, I have but he never contacts, and I send angry texts because he ignores me for like two days I know he gets them, and then I get angry, but after a Lon period o no responses
elaina Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Hello Shygirl, He doesn't seem like a good boyfriend. Why is he your boyfriend? If my boyfriend ignored me like that, he'd no longer be my boyfriend. About sending 30 texts... wow. I don't have any brothers, but I know from my male friends that this kind of thing screams clingy and insecurity and makes men run for the hills! Please don't do that anymore. Also, was it Stargazer who was talking about a textship? I don't remember, but your relationship with this guy doesn't sound like a true boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. It sounds like a textship where you're doing all the um... texting. Just don't text him anymore. Make new friends! Have fun in life! Get so busy that he slips out of your mind, and when he texts, just text back ONCE for every text he sends, and you can see if your relationship grows out of this and into the real thing. You deserve a real relationship! Not one where you're texting the guy who's ignoring you! What kind of a boyfriend is that?!
a_woman Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Thanks I'll try, I have but he never contacts, and I send angry texts because he ignores me for like two days I know he gets them, and then I get angry, but after a Lon period o no responses If he is like this a lot then the two of you may have incompatible communication and attachment styles. Look up 'stonewalling', if it's applicable you may need to move on. Silence is very hard to handle, that's why it's so effective.
Author shygal1 Posted August 16, 2010 Author Posted August 16, 2010 Silence is hard to ignore and it is a igniter for me to getting upset
Art_Critic Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 Silence is hard to ignore and it is a igniter for me to getting upset Flip it then.. You know the power and how it feels.. Then treat him to unadulterated silence.. Silence can be deafening
confused192 Posted August 16, 2010 Posted August 16, 2010 If you have sent a couple of texts to your boyfriend and he hasn't replied to any of them, ask yourself what sending another text is really going to do? Do you think it will really make a difference if you just send him one more text? No, it won't. This might help you from sending so many texts, especially if you do know that he gets them and reads them. Sending one more text won't make him suddenly respond so you should try to refrain from sending more until HE contacts YOU. I know that is easier said than done when you are starting to get frustrated and angry but believe me, it is inifinitely more positive in the long run.
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