Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 It's incredible! I dated and loved my ex-girlfriend for six years. Six years, and I never, ever felt this strongly for her. I'm a realist and a skeptic, so the word "love" will not be used, but what I feel for this woman feels like what poets and people describe as love. I'd use the word infatuation or limerance in it's place, but right now it all means the same thing for me. We are so in tune with each other it feels like our lives were just a journey to prepare us for each other. Am I actually typing this? Wow...this is weird, even for me, and I'm a strange guy. She met a couple of my friends last night, and we kissed and held each other in front of them, and it was a no-brainer. Why do I mention this? Only because I've never done the whole PDA thing. We can wrap our bodies together and feel completely at peace. We can kiss for hours on end and enjoy every minute of it. It's so strong that putting it into words is incredibly hard, but it feels like she was made for me and I was made for her. I couldn't be happier
kdark Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 I hope for your sake she is on the same page as you. Is this the "plain" girl you were talking about before?
Author Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Author Posted August 15, 2010 I hope for your sake she is on the same page as you. Is this the "plain" girl you were talking about before? There were 3 total, the two 19 year old girls neither of which I followed through with. This girl I met at the bar last Thursday and ended up in bed with her, although we saved sex for the second day. I'm usually against quick sex with someone new, but this was different. We tortured ourselves back and forth until we met again after work and had the most incredible sex I can remember having. She does feel the same way, but we're both a little wary of commitment but it's only her for me now and same for her. We've been discussing how strong the feeling is, and without her even saying it I KNOW she feels the same way as I do. You know all that romantic talk about "being one with someone"? I would usually laugh before if someone said that, but now I feel that way. I'm walking on clouds, and every minute we talk or spend together is better than the last. I think I'm making myself sick with this, something is wrong with me. Might be a mental disorder
kdark Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 There were 3 total, the two 19 year old girls neither of which I followed through with. This girl I met at the bar last Thursday and ended up in bed with her, although we saved sex for the second day. I'm usually against quick sex with someone new, but this was different. We tortured ourselves back and forth until we met again after work and had the most incredible sex I can remember having. She does feel the same way, but we're both a little wary of commitment but it's only her for me now and same for her. We've been discussing how strong the feeling is, and without her even saying it I KNOW she feels the same way as I do. You know all that romantic talk about "being one with someone"? I would usually laugh before if someone said that, but now I feel that way. I'm walking on clouds, and every minute we talk or spend together is better than the last. I think I'm making myself sick with this, something is wrong with me. Might be a mental disorder Sounds like a promising, budding romantic relationship. And there is nothing wrong with you, you just really like her.
meerkat stew Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 Might be a mental disorder If you have done any looking into the science behind limerence, then you know that it is exactly that, a mental disorder, a terrible, beautiful one that can either end you up in anguish or become the foundation of a more lasting feeling. Step back, breathe and enjoy. Try not to grab at it, nail it down or get too heavy in efforts to extend it. Listen to the song "Love is a Rose," over and over and make it your mantra.
bunnixkisses Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 Congrats! You have what 90% of people in the world are searching for!
TaraMaiden Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 ...."limerance".....? I'm really happy for you, BtW.... I mean, really, really happy. Such great news..... (Limerance.......? )
Author Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Author Posted August 15, 2010 ...."limerance".....? I'm really happy for you, BtW.... I mean, really, really happy. Such great news..... (Limerance.......? ) "Limerence is an involuntary cognitive and emotional state of intense romantic desire for another person. The term was coined by psychologist Dorothy Tennov to describe the ultimate, near-obsessive form of romantic love." From wiki.
TaraMaiden Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 Oh, Limerence! I thought you'd said Limerance! That's so much clearer now.....! :laugh: Ok, I get it.... I'm not up with modern relationship parlance.... I don't know how she came up with that term....I thought 'passionate' covered that.....
Author Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Author Posted August 15, 2010 Oh, Limerence! I thought you'd said Limerance! That's so much clearer now.....! :laugh: Ok, I get it.... I'm not up with modern relationship parlance.... I don't know how she came up with that term....I thought 'passionate' covered that..... My bad! Spelled it wrong, remember reading about it in a book. Women's Infidelity something about Limbo. Helped me kind of understand what my ex girlfriend was going through, as she appeared to be feeling limerence towards someone else. Explains my situation now, but I don't want to move TOO fast. I feel very strongly, I've always experienced strong emotions and been empathetic towards others as well. So I have to keep a clear head while balancing this feeling, but it's a wonderful feeling. I was down about my life for a while, but I got a job and met her and now it's much improved. Even my friends are confused by the change, but it's a very positive one and I've made a lot of new friends, and I'm being impulsive as I pointed out in my other thread.
TaraMaiden Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 I can completely understand your caution. I totally hope this is the most wonderful upturn you've been praying for. I'll even light a candle on my "Buddha altar" for you, and give up a few whooepees!
Author Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Author Posted August 15, 2010 I can completely understand your caution. I totally hope this is the most wonderful upturn you've been praying for. I'll even light a candle on my "Buddha altar" for you, and give up a few whooepees! I was going to ask you about the avatar. I've been a bit more spiritual lately myself, but not enough to follow any one organized religion. I've always felt like taking a mish-mash of concepts from different ones. Was raised Catholic for 16 years (strict parents!) and I walked away from it then. I should create a thread in the spirituality section actually.
TaraMaiden Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 I'd be glad to PM, if you want, (no pressure...Buddhists honestly hate that crap!) or I would respond in your new thread, if you create one... I was brought up Roman Catholic, and changed course around 20 years ago... The Avatar isn't me. it's an Englishwoman called Tezin Palmo, (ordained name, natch!).. a book called "Cave in the Snow" was written about her. Incredible woman. If you're at all interested, here's a link.... Formidable woman. I don't follow Tibetan Buddhism, myself, but I do look up to her.....
Gallaxia Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 It's incredible! I dated and loved my ex-girlfriend for six years. Six years, and I never, ever felt this strongly for her. I'm a realist and a skeptic, so the word "love" will not be used, but what I feel for this woman feels like what poets and people describe as love. I'd use the word infatuation or limerance in it's place, but right now it all means the same thing for me. We are so in tune with each other it feels like our lives were just a journey to prepare us for each other. Am I actually typing this? Wow...this is weird, even for me, and I'm a strange guy. She met a couple of my friends last night, and we kissed and held each other in front of them, and it was a no-brainer. Why do I mention this? Only because I've never done the whole PDA thing. We can wrap our bodies together and feel completely at peace. We can kiss for hours on end and enjoy every minute of it. It's so strong that putting it into words is incredibly hard, but it feels like she was made for me and I was made for her. I couldn't be happier Really don't have anything to add but OMG, can I say just how cute this is?!!! A blissful spot to be in.
denise_xo Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 What a nice happy thread and how great for you - enjoy!
InceptorsRule Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 I'm walking on clouds, and every minute we talk or spend together is better than the last. I think I'm making myself sick with this, something is wrong with me. Might be a mental disorder OK great, you're in love. Before you get serious you need to find out what her FICO score is and get current copies of her credit reports from all three of the major credit bureaus.
InceptorsRule Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 How old are you two?? I think they're somewhere between Size 4 and 5 Huggies, so quite young.
Author Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Author Posted August 15, 2010 How old are you two?? I'm 25, she's 23.
Gallaxia Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 I think they're somewhere between Size 4 and 5 Huggies, so quite young. Reaaaally?
Author Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Author Posted August 15, 2010 The best thing last night? She fell asleep on me and took my jacket and slept with it. It was cute as all hell, so I left the jacket with her .
Star Gazer Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 What connection do you share that isn't sexual?? Do you know her background, her history, her hopes and dreams, her needs, what little things make her happy...?
dispatch3d Posted August 15, 2010 Posted August 15, 2010 4 days? Lol is it weird that I would probably try to distance myself at this point thinking I'm a little TOOO into this one without any true reason to be.
Author Engadget Posted August 15, 2010 Author Posted August 15, 2010 What connection do you share that isn't sexual?? Do you know her background, her history, her hopes and dreams, her needs, what little things make her happy...? We connect on every level, I wouldn't be feeling like this if it was only sexual. My friend that met her and her roomie last night said "This is weird, it feels like you've known them for years". We both love movies, books, hiking and the outdoors, fishing, so many things. We finish each others sentences and more than a few times said the same things at the same time. I smile constantly thinking about her, sexually or not. We're not officially dating so we can get to know each other even more but we agreed we'll accept each other's flaws as we go along.
Recommended Posts