USMCHokie Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 21 U.S.C. Sec. 802 is actually irrelevant to this precise question because this statute does NOT bar you from dating an occasional user. It simply sets forth a list of substances which you are prohibited from using, possessing, or being in the presence of. That's fine and no one has asked you to violate the law. Actually, that citation was only in reference to your semantics argument over my use of the term "recreational drug" to include alcohol...US federal law expressly excludes it from their definition. That is all. I have no issue with it at all. I am simply asking you why dating a marijuana user is a deal breaker for you. You keep saying "marijuana is illegal." So what? As explained in my post above, murder and rape are also illegal. Some people don't date fat people, some people don't date people twice their age, and some people don't date certain races. I simply choose not to date lawbreakers. It's all personal preference.
tman666 Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 IMO most of the people it's a deal-breaker for did not go to a college where everyone and their mom smoked pot, so their opinion regarding how harmless it is is based on pot's illegal status in this county as opposed to first-hand experience... but that's a different story. Your statement makes completely unfounded assumptions. I went to a school where it seemed like "everyone and their mom" smoked, and I went to the "more conservative" of the two leading universities in my state. Practically every college campus in the U.S., even religiously based institutions, is going to be full of full time, part time, or simply experimental MJ users. I agree with you that it's a fact of life, especially amongst the college aged crowd. However, my opinion of regular MJ users has nothing to do with naivety or over-sensitivity to the fact on my part. It has everything to do with the culture and mindset regular users. It's as simple as this: from my experience, the ideals of those who are regular users do not coincide with the ideals that I espouse in my own life. Therefore, why would I choose to spend my time dating a "pothead" whose lifestyle and ideals do not correlate with my own? For me, it has nothing to do with legality or some fear and misunderstanding of the drug. Don't assume that those who refrain from MJ are somehow "less enlightened" than those who use it. It's a personal choice, but it doesn't mean that either group has to hold hands with the other and sing kumbaya.
USMCHokie Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 I thought this thread was about "would you date me" rather than some frekin agenda driven pot smoker who wants pot to be made legal.. ( not talking about you spookie ) InceptorsRule.. go start your own freakin thread on pot.. I was enjoying reading this thread.. even though I won't post on it because I'm married.. that is till it got thread jacked to push a pot agenda.. I agree, Art, and I want to apologize to spookie and those who actually wanted to see this thread grow for its intended purpose. Inceptor does have a habit of T/J'ing from what I've seen and I admit I got caught up in it.
TheBigQuestion Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 (edited) I understand the point you're making here, and I'm sure in many cases the people that use illegal controlled substances could very well be upstanding people with excellent character. But it's not so much that the effects of the drug may not be as detrimental as other drugs, but that recreational marijuana use is illegal in the United States. The person is knowingly and willingly breaking the law. I know many of you will get all riled up over this analogy (and I admit it's a poor one...), but a crime is a crime, so would it not be similar to a person who murdered or raped for sh*ts and giggles...? It doesn't matter what one's personal feelings are about the policy behind drug laws...it's still illegal...and my counter to those who personally believe and argue that US drug laws are silly, then you would be no different from a person who doesn't believe murder is wrong and thinks murder laws are silly... So it's more the character and personality traits of someone who chooses not to follow the law...I hold myself to a certain standard and I'd expect a partner to do the same... You're definitely capable of making better analogies and also capable of better reasoning. You just equated someone who smokes weed to a rapist/murderer. That's about as ridiculous as saying I'm like a wife-beater just because I've had a parking ticket. The reason people sometimes choose to ignore certain laws is because those laws are the product of ignorant, misinformed, inaccurate views and data. Not every law is a just law (in fact I'd argue that there's far more unjust laws than just laws on the books right now), nor is it worth enforcing. Look at the sodomy laws still in effect in some states. Hell, up until a few decades ago, you could technically be imprisoned for sneezing on a train in a few states. Disregarding said laws is not indicative of poor character or a low standard of respect for law and order; if anything, it's indicative of rational free thought and an ability to see beyond herd mentalities and blind authority, qualities which are crucial to the progress of society and (getting somewhat back on topic) are things that a lot of people value in their partners. Edited August 9, 2010 by TheBigQuestion
InceptorsRule Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 While in my opinion, you have to be a complete moron to get in trouble with the law for recreational pot use, I respect that it's a dealbreaker for some. What business is it of someone you might be dating whether or not you sometimes use a little pot now and then when you're not even around the other person? I'm just not seeing the relevance of the pot use, per se, to the dating relationship, at all. It's the same way with lots of other behavior someone might engage in while casually dating, really none of the other person's business. We're not discussing elevation of the relationship to "serious", "exclusive," living together, etc. We're just talking about "dating," right? I mean apparently we are talking about zero tolerance, so let's say Gunny Highway goes out on Date No. 1 with Marsha Mason, and it's just a great first date, they are clicking on all eight cylinders. The next date is a couple of weeks later and iin the interim, Marsha happens to go to a party where Bill Clinton is guest of honor so a couple of joints get passed around and to be sociable Marsha takes a couple of puffs, but doesn't inhale. So then Date No. 2 comes around w/Gunny Highway, another great date, Marsha happens to mention what happened at the party and....that's it? Relationship "over"? Without taking into consideration anything else? I guess people have the right to behave this way, but I don't understand what logical thought process is going on. Remember--there is no Marine Corps prohibition of Gunny Highway dating Marsha under these circumstances, even if she partakes occasionally. IMO most of the people it's a deal-breaker for did not go to a college where everyone and their mom smoked pot, so their opinion regarding how harmless it is is based on pot's illegal status in this county as opposed to first-hand experience... but that's a different story. People with too many "deal breakers" which are not based on rational evaluations of the other person's total character and qualities can risk ending up with someone who perhaps fulfills a bunch of arbitrary "qualifications" but may be totally incompatible because the person making up the checklist left out all the important stuff. Even though I know it's hypocritical, it's actually a big turnoff for me, although my reasons are different from the usual "it's illegal" bs. I wouldn't want to date a pothead because I know it would escalate my own pot use. My bf does not smoke and although he doesn't mind that I do, I prefer being sober around sober people, so seeing him is an incentive to abstain. We are not talking about "dating a pothead" though. We are talking about whether ANY recreational use of pot, ever, under any circumstances, would be a deal breaker. In fact, this all came up in response to your prior post in which you happened to mention your pot use, but obviously it's not a "problem" for you, at all. So what's the deal breaker here?
InceptorsRule Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 So it's more the character and personality traits of someone who chooses not to follow the law...I hold myself to a certain standard and I'd expect a partner to do the same... LOL, "partners"? I thought we were just talking about dating.
USMCHokie Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 You're definitely capable of making better analogies and also capable of better reasoning. You just equated someone who smokes weed to a rapist/murderer. That's about as ridiculous as saying I'm like a wife-beater just because I've had a parking ticket. The reason people sometimes choose to ignore certain laws is because those laws are the product of ignorant, misinformed, inaccurate views and data. Not every law is a just law (in fact I'd argue that there's far more unjust laws than just laws on the books right now), nor is it worth enforcing. Look at the sodomy laws still in effect in some states. Hell, up until a few decades ago, you could technically be imprisoned for sneezing on a train in a few states. Disregarding said laws is not indicative of poor character or a low standard of respect for law and order; if anything, it's indicative of rational free thought and an ability to see beyond herd mentalities and blind authority, qualities which are crucial to the progress of society and (getting somewhat back on topic) are things that a lot of people value in their partners. I agree, laws evolve and change as society evolves and changes...but take a look at your logic here...those people who disregard laws they find unjust should be praised for their free thought and progressive views...? Now I must point out that you are basing your entire argument on scattered viewpoints of individuals...so it's a good quality to be pretentious enough to equate your own personal views with what is right for society and this country and act accordingly...? Although some states are trying to change their drug laws, I don't see the country really making large strides in response to civil disobedience...
Serenitynow Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 utterly amazing that no one has the common sense to start a separate thread, instead they continue to hijack this one over and over. .
InceptorsRule Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 I simply choose not to date lawbreakers. How would you know if someone you're casually dating is a "lawbreaker"?
Sophia8 Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 So taking this thread back on topic... Gender: F Age: 23 Height: 5'10 Weight: 56kg/almost 9 stone Bald: No Occupation: Government Civil Servant/Part-time student # Divorces: 0 # Kids: 0 Biggest Insecurity: Although I can convey confidence deep down I lack it.
USMCHokie Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 How would you know if someone you're casually dating is a "lawbreaker"? Start a new thread about the topic or PM me if you are really that bothered by it.
InceptorsRule Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 Start a new thread about the topic or PM me if you are really that bothered by it. Stand down Marine. I outrank you. Dismissed.
brainygirl Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 Stand down Marine. I outrank you. Dismissed. As a general rule, military folk don't like rank jokes from non-military folk, and it goes officers, then enlisted, then retired officers and enlisted, then civilians.
tman666 Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 Stand down Marine. I outrank you. Dismissed. Aaaannnd this is the part where Hokie would probably break a bottle over your smelly, dreadlocked head. Kidding, but that was pretty weak, broski.
InceptorsRule Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 Aaaannnd this is the part where Hokie would probably break a bottle over your smelly, dreadlocked head. Kidding, but that was pretty weak, broski. Inceptors beat Marines every time.
InceptorsRule Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 As a general rule, military folk don't like rank jokes from non-military folk, and it goes officers, then enlisted, then retired officers and enlisted, then civilians. LOL military personnel don't outrank "civilians." Besides, I'm an Inceptor and we outrank everyone.
Confusedalways Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 keeping within the topic... Gender: F Age: 22 Height: 5'5" Weight: 150 Bald: long, brown hair. Occupation: grad school in childhood edu # Divorces: 0 # Kids: 0 Biggest Insecurity: low self esteem, probably.
MrNate Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 keeping within the topic... Gender: F Age: 22 Height: 5'5" Weight: 150 Bald: long, brown hair. Occupation: grad school in childhood edu # Divorces: 0 # Kids: 0 Biggest Insecurity: low self esteem, probably. I would! I kind of have a thing for girls who like to work with kids.
MrNate Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 I agree, Art, and I want to apologize to spookie and those who actually wanted to see this thread grow for its intended purpose. Inceptor does have a habit of T/J'ing from what I've seen and I admit I got caught up in it. Good job on being the better man Hokie. After all we have to see what the ladies think of our half-assed profiles!
Stung Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 I cannot wait for the day marijuana is legalized so I can grow it next to the rosemary and sage in my garden, sauteing it with the dinner vegetables. Truth be told, spook, I'll probably do the same (when legalized, when my kids are much much older, probably grown and gone). I haven't smoked in years and I wouldn't want to start it up regularly, as I did when much younger, as it's not good for my motivation...but as a once-in-a-while,it's a nice stress-relief. I could dig becoming the Gran with the special brownies. As for the dating scene in here, while I might have missed a few posts, it didn't look too good for me. As a group y'all are a bit on the young side, at 35 I tend to prefer my meat a bit more...seasoned. I guess it's a good thing this was purely hypothetical and I'm not really playing anyway, being married and all. I like the premise though. I haven't seen many I'd exclude just on their stats, other than their ages. Height, while one of the hot-button issues around here, is not a particularly big deal for me, although my guess is several of the male posters here would actually exclude me based on my own height. I HAVE, after spending months reading this board, noticed several posters I would exclude as (hypothetical) dating prospects purely based on their attitudes.
USMCHokie Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Good job on being the better man Hokie. After all we have to see what the ladies think of our half-assed profiles! If only Leia would look at mine... But in the meantime, we can continue checking each other out in the mirror in the gym locker room...no homo... :laugh:
Mutant Debutante Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 I feel like I haven't seen anyone I'd rule out bc of height or job or whatever, but I wish more people had put in their favorite hobby, which some people started adding later. That tells me more, really. Like I'm sure Mr. Nate is a great guy but I'm into guys who have more artistic hobbies than bodybuilding, just my deal. So then there's me: Gender: F Age: 24 Height: 5'2" (and a half!) Weight: 110ish, goes up and down five pounds all the time Bald: Definitely not. Blond blunt cut, sometimes streaked or red or some fun color. Occupation: Set/costume design. Also weekend bartender and sometime artist's model. #Divorces: 0 #Kids: 0...or 1...it's murky. 2 dependents. Fav. Hobby: Designing & sewing clothes. Painting. Gardening. Biggest insecurity: My family history is dramatic, and it's a lot of baggage. I'm working through it and taking responsibility for my two little sisters, one of them is still a kid, so that's kind of a big deal and makes dating complicated.
Explorer Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Gender: M Age: 27 Height: 5'11 Weight: 180lbs Bald: No Occupation: CEO's right-hand man. # Divorces: 0 # Kids: 0 Biggest Insecurity: Not able to be happy.
Un-Conventional Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Gender: M Age: 25 Height: 5'9 Weight: 215lbs Bald: Nope the complete opposite actually, currently rocking a Afro Occupation: Patent Examiner # Divorces: 0 # Kids: 0 Biggest Insecurity: Pssh! Where do I begin. Biggest would be Weight and Fear of Rejection
MrNate Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 I feel like I haven't seen anyone I'd rule out bc of height or job or whatever, but I wish more people had put in their favorite hobby, which some people started adding later. That tells me more, really. Like I'm sure Mr. Nate is a great guy but I'm into guys who have more artistic hobbies than bodybuilding, just my deal. So then there's me: Gender: F Age: 24 Height: 5'2" (and a half!) Weight: 110ish, goes up and down five pounds all the time Bald: Definitely not. Blond blunt cut, sometimes streaked or red or some fun color. Occupation: Set/costume design. Also weekend bartender and sometime artist's model. #Divorces: 0 #Kids: 0...or 1...it's murky. 2 dependents. Fav. Hobby: Designing & sewing clothes. Painting. Gardening. Biggest insecurity: My family history is dramatic, and it's a lot of baggage. I'm working through it and taking responsibility for my two little sisters, one of them is still a kid, so that's kind of a big deal and makes dating complicated. Thanks . well in my defense, powerlifting is different from bodybuilding. We lift for strength while bodybuilders usually obsess over size and appearance. So powerlifters tend to have pretty dense, strong muscles but not the crazy size like those silly bodybuilders. Just a little info you probably don't care about haha Besides, I also played clarinet and a little tenor sax:love:
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