so_mo34 Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 i have been in a casual sex relationship with a 35 year old man from work for a year now. im 22. i fell for him and i have no idea if he knows i like him or not. it's obvious he doesn't like me that way. he does invite me out all the time lately to bars and for me to bring friends, but i think it's because he wants a 3 sum. he hits on every young girl at work and started hitting on my friend who he met once through facebook chat. when were in bed he is constantly on his iphone. he was like holding up his phone in my view and he was texting non-stop this girl i got upset over before and he knows that. he randomly showed me pictures of his ex-gf and i got really jealous. sometimes i get the feeling that he likes making me feel jealous. he is kind of moody sometimes with me too. he never cuddles me. he does make me food though when im at his house and picks me up/drops me off sometimes, but most of the time i drive 25 minutes to see him. i know in my head that i am being used big time and that he doesn't care about me. but at the same time i like him so much and im soo attracted to him that i can't imagine not seeing him on a regular basis. doesn't help that i work with him too. i know i have to end it because this is destroying me emotionally, but i just can't bring myself to do it. i hate being miserable all the time, but im going to be even more miserable when it ends. i feel like it's something im never going to get over. i need some advice please i just feel so horrible.
USMCHokie Posted August 9, 2010 Posted August 9, 2010 i know in my head that i am being used big time and that he doesn't care about me. but at the same time i like him so much and im soo attracted to him that i can't imagine not seeing him on a regular basis. i know i have to end it because this is destroying me emotionally, but i just can't bring myself to do it. i hate being miserable all the time, but im going to be even more miserable when it ends. i feel like it's something im never going to get over. i need some advice please i just feel so horrible. No one can help you and you cannot help yourself until you want to be helped. Go see a counselor.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 i have been in a casual sex relationship with a 35 year old man from work for a year now. im 22. i fell for him and i have no idea if he knows i like him or not. it's obvious he doesn't like me that way. he does invite me out all the time lately to bars and for me to bring friends, but i think it's because he wants a 3 sum. he hits on every young girl at work and started hitting on my friend who he met once through facebook chat. when were in bed he is constantly on his iphone. he was like holding up his phone in my view and he was texting non-stop this girl i got upset over before and he knows that. he randomly showed me pictures of his ex-gf and i got really jealous. sometimes i get the feeling that he likes making me feel jealous. he is kind of moody sometimes with me too. he never cuddles me. he does make me food though when im at his house and picks me up/drops me off sometimes, but most of the time i drive 25 minutes to see him. i know in my head that i am being used big time and that he doesn't care about me. but at the same time i like him so much and im soo attracted to him that i can't imagine not seeing him on a regular basis. doesn't help that i work with him too. i know i have to end it because this is destroying me emotionally, but i just can't bring myself to do it. i hate being miserable all the time, but im going to be even more miserable when it ends. i feel like it's something im never going to get over. i need some advice please i just feel so horrible. While reading this I stopped to wonder what it would be like if males were very often in your shoes. Generally, the scenario you describe is one of the trappings of femininity (you get to do the nasty with men to whom you are attracted but who want no more than sex from you). Would male life be any different if males got lots and lots of sexual at-bats with various women they admired, only to have it made clear later that those women were completely using said men? Mostly, I wonder what the difference is between how it would really be for such men, and how the men of today's world think it would be in such a world. **************************** Aside from that, I sense that you, like most any female between the ages of 12 and 30, are just on one particular step of the long trial-and-error method of gauging the value of your feminine social appeal.
MrNate Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 No one can help you and you cannot help yourself until you want to be helped. Go see a counselor. This. If you can't end things on your own, especially when you know this is damaging you, then you need to seek clinical help.
Ruby Slippers Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Imagine that one of your best friends, or your sister, were in this situation. What would you advise her to do? Do that.
SadandConfusedWA Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 It won't hurt as much as you fear it would. Once you end it, you will feel like a huge burden has been lifted. You will be pissed at yourself for staying in this dynamic for so long.
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