Jump to content

Girl at work, ask out or not?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted
No, you can't. Because at work she can claim "sexual harassement"...

 

Disagree completely, sexual harrassment and its applicability is completely misunderstood by most laymen. In this situation the risk of any work consequences are negligible unless "no-date" provisions are in place and this has been discussed. Ask her out politely for a proper drink so there is no confusion about group dates, etc. If she says no, drop it, don't persist.

 

If OP worked with her in the same space daily and not biweekly, or had some supervisory control over her, the answer would be different, but those aren't the case.

Posted
Disagree completely, sexual harrassment and its applicability is completely misunderstood by most laymen. In this situation the risk of any work consequences are negligible unless "no-date" provisions are in place and this has been discussed. Ask her out politely for a proper drink so there is no confusion about group dates, etc. If she says no, drop it, don't persist.

 

If OP worked with her in the same space daily and not biweekly, or had some supervisory control over her, the answer would be different, but those aren't the case.

 

the official terms and everything is great if you are a lawyer. I mean this is great, and I"m sure I misunderstand exactly what consitutes sexual harrasment and what doesn't. One way I WOULDN'T want to find out is testing my limits though! Or have her accuse me of something that wasn't sexual harrassement in the first place. Doesn't paint a good picture (even if you aren't at fault at all!).

 

getting her to go for drinks with coworkers is no-risk really. You find out then how much compliance you have (have to have a little for her to want to go), so it serves as an initial test. It also removes the whole work thing from the equation, and gets her in a spot where it's more smooth to escalate the relationship further.

Posted

I say go for it!!! You like her, and it clearly seems like she is interested too so why not :) As for sexual harassment... to play it safe at first maybe just refer to her facebook complaint about not knowing anyone in the city and AS A FRIEND offer to show her around a bit on the weekend. Then you can get a vibe whilst not "sexually harassing" her ;)

 

Ask her. And do it soon! And let us know how it goes... x

×
×
  • Create New...