LindaLiss Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 So im dating my boyfriend, we live together, and today is our first year aniversary together. I dont feel so bad that we can't go to the movies, go out to eat, or he even give me a card due to the fact that there's no money for that. I totally understand and dont blame him even if I deep down wish I could at least go celebrate it. The thing is that today I asked him if he could at least cook me a romantic dinner but he got pissed off and told me to go cook myself, so ok.. I went and made dinner. As the day passes he tells me happy aniversary and kisses me, I really wanted to spend at least our night together and enjoy it in our room... but all of the sudden his laptop charger died and he got pissed off and started using mine. Since I just recently got my laptop I asked him and told him to not download movies or games... sooo he started yelling at me and stormed off yelling at me some more. So now Im left alone on what was supposed to be a romantic night, in my living room, pretty much feeling horrible inside. Anybody else feeling just as bad as me??
carhill Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 So, is he pissed off because he has no money? It sounds to me like he has a hard time communicating what really is going on. It doesn't take money to enjoy a wonderful romantic anniversary. I remember when I used to make handmade cards for my stbx and cook dinner myself. Personally, I don't know which is worse, the yelling or the stone cold silence. Neither is healthy IMO. I'd attempt to get to the bottom of what is bothering him and work on it together, or, if no joy, start looking for a place of your own.
Author LindaLiss Posted December 5, 2009 Author Posted December 5, 2009 ive tried talking to him before but he just yells more, its always yelling and its got to the point that im afraid to ask because he gets worked up easily. I kinda wish he changed
carhill Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Then educate him about the sound of silence, meaning the dearth of your presence. 'I feel demeaned and attacked, constantly. I find this behavior unacceptable. I'm leaving.'
torranceshipman Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 If he can't be bothered to treat you with a little bit of love and respect on your anniversary then i think you might need a new boyfriend.
TheGuitarist Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 It saddens me to hear of a woman in your situation. The issue here is an underlying one. When a relationship gets to the point where SIGNIFICANT arguments are caused by INSIGNIFICANT things then its definitely time for you all to communicate.
learning to deal Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Communication is huge and it sounds like that's a problem for him. My heart goes out to you. Either he needs to open up if he cares about you, or you need to find someone that will appreciate you and love you even through rough times
Author LindaLiss Posted December 6, 2009 Author Posted December 6, 2009 thank u so much for those words, they are helping me a lot, take care
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