a_Lien34 Posted December 1, 2009 Posted December 1, 2009 (edited) Hello all, I'm a 22 year old college student that met a really cool, fun girl online. We did the IM thing, then the phone thing, and then we went on a first date. We found that we had a great connection and ended the first date with a make out session. Fast forward to second date: More of the same. I take her out for dinner, ice cream (special surprise for her), then saw a movie. There was a lot of hand holding, boyfriend-girlfriend kind of stuff (getting close during the movie, giggling, etc.). The short of it is we took it to her mother's house at the end of the night and made out, then cuddled on the couch. Here is where it got interesting: I asked her: "So are you dating anyone else?" She told me she is and asked if I am. I kind of bluffed, but she found out that I'm really not seeing anyone else and that I'm inexperienced in relationships. She basically told me not to be scared to date others and "live my life." And also that she "might not be the girl you're looking for" if I'm looking to go long-term and that since I'm not experienced in relationships I should date around. She got out of a heavy relationship six months ago and wants to "see what's out there now." Nothing wrong with all of this, but I didn't react enthusiastically. I was just kind of bewildered at how we could have a great connection but she's still like "let's play the field for now." We were talking and within the span of a couple minutes I was being led to the door (I didn't get angry, but it was clear that I wasn't thrilled about what I was hearing), not knowing what happened. I think I said something like: "Are you testing me or something? Trying to see how I react?" The short of it is that it got kind of uncomfortable. It's non-sexual, so nothing to worry about in that regard with the other guys. She told me if she decides to get exclusive with any of the other guys she'd tell me and after a little hesitation said she'd let the other guys know if she got exclusive with me. (One other interesting thing is that I had to call her after I left her house because I got lost and she said that giving me directions was the "least she could do, after all I did for her during the date." She called me sweet several times during this convo too. Women confuse me.) I tried setting up the third date before I was led to the door, but she told me (with her arms crossed) she'll let me know when a good time to get together would be. "So when's a good time to call you this week?" "Whenever." I still gave her a good night kiss and got a quick, tight hug. So my game plan right now is to wait until Tuesday night to call her (I usually call her Monday). I'm not going to bring up our semi-dispute/confusing convo Saturday, but keep it light and fun. I've also decided that even if we're available this weekend, I probably won't go out with her until next week--give us both some space. I guess my question is: Am I going about this the right way? I'm giving her a few days of space and not appearing too desperate. A little bit of things breaking down at the end of the date won't ruin things I imagine, but I still don't want to talk to her right away. I've seen evidence of these other guys on her Facebook (one of whom it looks like she'll see Wednesday--I'm not stalking, just curious), but I know I can't worry about them too much. I guess the thing is that she has strong feelings for me, but was kind of thrown off by the way I seemed to be interested in exclusivity on the second date (though I didn't suggest it). Thanks for reading and any help and insight would be appreciated. Edited December 1, 2009 by a_Lien34
BWLoca Posted December 1, 2009 Posted December 1, 2009 I would suggest maybe calling her but not setting up any plans whatsoever. Don't even ask what she's doing. Keep it light and fun...and then end the call.
Author a_Lien34 Posted December 1, 2009 Author Posted December 1, 2009 (edited) I called her and left a voice message. I mentioned something about the moon being full outside and how beautiful it looked. I was kind of nervous and it probably showed a little bit. Meh. All I can do at this point is move on and see if she calls back. My plan was--if I talked to her--to not set up anything for this weekend, but maybe do a day date next week. We'll see what happens. Edited December 1, 2009 by a_Lien34
woopster638 Posted December 2, 2009 Posted December 2, 2009 dude......go out and date other chickz, she's probably do the same thing and don't put her pussy on the pedestal, becoz it will hurt you when another fool bangs her lol
Author a_Lien34 Posted December 2, 2009 Author Posted December 2, 2009 Well put. It's exactly what I'm going to be doing. We talked tonight and are not going to date anymore. It was a good conversation and we're going to stay friends. I certainly didn't freak out and there are no hard feelings on either side. I just wanted to be sure of what was going on.
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