mortensorchid Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 I'd like to share this story about a psycho from a year ago that I had the misfortune of having my name attached to. He is the Cake Man that some of you may or may not remember, I shall recap the story as it unfolded... Summer of 2008. I met this guy at a party, we realized that we had met six months before at a friend's Christmas party. We get together, I was with him for a few weeks. Then, as it was his birthday, I baked him a cake for it. I called him, as I had not heard from him (his birthday was on a Sunday) and the last I had heard from him was on Thursday of that week. The Monday after his birthday, he sends me a text message telling me to check my email. It was the break up email, telling me that he was so damaged by some past bad relationships that he couldn't get into another one and his birthday coming along only intensified it. He said he was sorry that I had baked him the cake and all, but he was angry that I had told so-and-so that I had baked it and that I hadn't heard from him. Well I was insulted to say the least, that he was trying to pin this situation on me. How gauche that he was getting depressed about his birthday and blamed me for it. Well apparently he wasn't so distraught about his past, because a week or two later he's going out with one of my friends! She didn't know, and I didn't let her onto what had happened. I would see the two of them at the local watering hole and of course say hello to both, and he would give me some cold and unfeeling grunt and she would have a conversation with me. Then Thanksgiving Day of 2008. Depending on whose version of the story you choose to believe, something went down that morning. My friend ended up being launched off his front porch and the left side of her face swollen shut. I went to her once I heard that, offering sympathy. I apologized to her, as he never hit me or threatened to hit me, and if he had I would have told her immediately. She and I came together over that tighter than we had before. Apparently he was a condescending, jealous, possessive man who wouldn't let her out of his sight for five minutes. He became a man possessed, texting and calling at all hours, trying to break into her house. He even stole her phone, called many of her guy friends, and told them to stay away from her! And he stole her dog in attempt to get her to come back to him! He followed her around town, begging and pleading for her forgiveness, making a huge scene in front of anyone and everyone she happened to be around (including me). Then he started harassing ME online through Facebook and MySpace, telling me he was furious with ME for being her friend and that I wasn't really her friend because I liked her but because I was getting revenge against him! That was a year ago, he's tappered off in his crazy behavior and he's more or less left me and my friend alone. Now the guy is clearly nuts (I had no idea he was that crazy when I was with him), but I wonder why it's ok for HIM to act like a psycho but not ME (not that I'm going to) or any other women that he's broken it off with? One sends a stronger message by moving on and not letting the other get to them.
Ophelia Rue Posted November 30, 2009 Posted November 30, 2009 Who said it was okay for him to act like a total psycho?? What did you say to him when he sent you those rude, ****ty messages on Myspace? God, what a freak. My ex-friend is dating someone just like him, except I guess she likes his psycho behavior. Note the EX in friend.
Angel1111 Posted November 30, 2009 Posted November 30, 2009 What's ok in his book doesn't mean that those need to be your standards, or that you need to concern yourself with his. His rules aren't relevant, or sane for that matter. I think it's obvious the guy is a nut but a few things about you stand out - not that you're a nut or anything along those lines - but: 1. Baking a cake for his birthday when the relationship is very new, and when you haven't even heard from him for a few days. Be careful about being too giving in the beginning of a relationship because it makes the other person feel obligated. This is not a message you want to send out. Generosity of that kind should be reserved for when a relationship is more solid. 2. Him sending you messages on myspace and facebook. Why are you an open book to the rest of the world? You should restrict that information only to people you allow on there. If he was already on there as a friend, then de-friend him and get him out of your life forever. Women just never get it that the more available they are to the outside world and to men, the more they de-value themselves. Let it be a privledge for people to get close to you. Don't come across as a doormat.
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