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Jogging for date and catfood


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Posted (edited)

For two weeks I scoped out an attractive jogger in my neighborhood. She was new to the area and at aprox 35 yrs old ...she was in my target dating age range (18-80) I learned her routine and planned my routine, I even did a timed practice run.

 

I would leave my home after she passed by, then jog very fast so as to pass her (and say hello) on a little hill. Then run downhill fast enough that she would lose site of me as I rounded the corner and took a short cut back to the bottom of the little hill. She jogged a much longer route, so I would have plenty of time to stop and rest (greatly needed) behind a tree in the nearby wooded area. After she passed, I'd jog up and pass her again on the hill. I would repeat this routine for 3 laps each day. She did 5 laps, but I'd reach exhaustion in 3 abbreviated laps. To her it would appear that I was easily lapping her.

 

As soon as I stepped out the door I felt uneasy. I wasn't sure why...certainly I'd done creepier things for a date. Maybe my body was telling me not to overdue the exercise. I started my jog and the uneasy feeling got very strong. I glanced back and saw a big cat running after me. (I'd call it a lynx-bobcat mix, or something) I started running at top speed and it was still closing. I didn't think I could run any faster but then it swung it's paws at my sneakers, I managed to run faster.

I flew by the jogger like she was standing still. I couldn't even summon the breath to warn her. (on some level I wanted the cat to switch targets anyway)

My heart was pounding and my vision getting blurred, so I was forced to make my stand at the hill's top. I spun around, 1 arm protecting my neck, the other in a fist. The cat was gone. No sign of him at all.

 

I dropped to my knees huffing and puffing. The jogger arrived and expressed concern that I was too old to run so fast and said I should pace myself. I barely breathed the word "tiger" before she took off.

 

I told my neighbors to keep an eye out for a mountain lion or whatever it is. Scary.

I'm not sure I should even bother to ask her out...it was pretty a bad scene.

Edited by Gold Pile
Posted

Well you know what they say..

 

You don't have to be the fastest... just second fastest

Posted

:laugh: I don't know why Gold Pile but your opening posts always make me think of:

 

"And that's when the fight started".

  • Author
Posted
:laugh: I don't know why Gold Pile but your opening posts always make me think of:

 

"And that's when the fight started".

 

:lmao: So true

Posted

I doubt a Bob-cat or lynx would attack a man unless they were defending youngsters. Swiping at your feet is the trademark of a cheeta. I assume you'd know one if you saw it, and you wouldn't have out run it.

 

I'm betting moutian lion or an over-fed house cat lol

Posted

GP... finally you're back.. we miss your hilarious stories.. :love::):bunny:

  • Author
Posted

sam writes:

an over-fed house cat lol
:lmao: wise guy. I've been image searching and can't find out what kind of cat it was. It definately looked like a Lynx, but the ears were smaller.

 

Lizzie writes:

miss your hilarious stories
:love: I haven't been here because nothing remotely funny has happened to me lately. I almost didn't post about this incident b/c it was nearly a tragic event, but you have to find the humor in all things.
Posted

It definately looked like a Lynx, but the ears were smaller

 

look up moutain lion

  • Author
Posted

not a MT Lion..or panther, or house cat, or tiger, or lion, or cheeta.

I'm betting a cross breed at least part Lynx

Posted

GP...

Maybe it was an old GF who was shape shifting to get her revenge..

If I were you I would keep looking over my shoulder :laugh:

 

After all... there are many a woman out there who have had their hearts broken by you :)

Posted
not a MT Lion..or panther, or house cat, or tiger, or lion, or cheeta.

I'm betting a cross breed at least part Lynx

 

 

Probably was a Cougar.. :laugh:

Posted

Lynx are capable of bursts of speed but can't maintain for very long. This does fit the profile of your feline shoe predator, except that lynx tend to live in evergreen forests.

 

Say you cross a lynx with a housecat and train it to attack running shoes, since you had a traumatic incident in your life with a nekkid jogger. This would match your perp, perfectly.

Posted

I find the whole story a little distrubing.

 

You should never just assume the predator will switch targets arbitrarily.:(

  • Author
Posted
GP...

Maybe it was an old GF who was shape shifting to get her revenge..

If I were you I would keep looking over my shoulder :laugh:

 

After all... there are many a woman out there who have had their hearts broken by you :)

 

Hi Art!,

certainly several angry women in my wake, but only a couple of slightly broken hearts. I seldom reach the falling in love stage.

Posted
She was new to the area and at aprox 35 yrs old ...she was in my target dating age range (18-80)

 

Ha ha ha ha ha!!! :lmao:

 

I think you should write this story out and the next time you see her just hand it to her. Seriously, I'd totally go out with you solely based on that. Funny guys with creative icebreakers = win!!

  • Author
Posted
Ha ha ha ha ha!!! :lmao:

 

I think you should write this story out and the next time you see her just hand it to her. Seriously, I'd totally go out with you solely based on that. Funny guys with creative icebreakers = win!!

:love:so where ya from??:love:
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