JL911 Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 So its my first Christmas with the lady...Been dating over 2 months now and just shopping for a few gift ideas...Im slightly confused on what to buy. She already told me she didnt want me to go overboard, so I suggested that the 2 of us set somewhat of a budget on each other not a definate number, just no more than $100 or something like that... I dont want to go overboard and get her a nice piece of jewelry (it seems too serious at this point), but im trying to find a few small things to show her that I picked up on a few of her interests and am trying to be somewhat thoughtful....Im starting to think maybe I dont know anything about her! Shes not really all too girly, but she does like certain girly things...I dont know if a stuffed animal would go over real well...Clothes are a definate no no as I could never shop for clothes for her, I'd just like to find 2 or so things that would just make her think I noticed a few things about her. Ive already heard her talking about a Nintendo Wii, a digital camera, and a few other higher dollar items...And while I dont have a problem purchasing one of them, I dont want to go overboard...
alphamale Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 Ive already heard her talking about a Nintendo Wii, a digital camera, and a few other higher dollar items...And while I dont have a problem purchasing one of them, I dont want to go overboard... you can get a basic digital camera for around $100
Author JL911 Posted November 28, 2009 Author Posted November 28, 2009 I was thinking about that one long and hard....She has one already but wasnt happy with it...I guess she wants a better one... She likes to travel, and i was trying to find a few things in that aspect, I figure a camera might be better suited on her birthday before she leaves on her next excursion...
Lakeside_runner Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 I've got a similar 'problem' I don't know yet but for my lady, because she's really into sports and we were talking about her doing a marathon/triathlon, I thought an author-signed copy of Hal Higdon's "The Ultra guide to running a marathon" or the "Triathlon training bible" would be nice. I thought of asking Higdon to write something like "26.2 - there's nothing that can go wrong. Just do it!" and then, on one of our dates she said that her biggest fear is the fear of failure (in small and big things). I ran a couple of marathons and I know that there is nothing better to conquer that fear than crossing the finish line. After that you fell like you can do pretty much anything in you life. So I also thought of putting in a little note saying something like that. I'm not sure though - what do you guys think? JL911: Did she ever mention any countries that she'd like to visit? Any specific interests? Just without thinking too much - what would be the first thing that pops into your mind when you think about her hobbies?
alphamale Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 I was thinking about that one long and hard....She has one already but wasnt happy with it...I guess she wants a better one... She likes to travel, and i was trying to find a few things in that aspect, I figure a camera might be better suited on her birthday before she leaves on her next excursion... how about a nice travel bag filled with all her favourite creams and lotions and all that other stuff that women use. you can sneak into her closet and find out which ones she uses
DustySaltus Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 You can get her a package at the day spa. Some places have deals for $100 bucks where she can get a massage, facial, manicure and pedicure or some sort of combination of these. while she's enjoying herself, she'll be thinking how thoughtful you are.
alphamale Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 no wait, this is your first xmas together. she'll be expecting something romantic. get her a $100 gift certificate to the local high end spa where she can get a facial/massage/haircut/pedicure, blah blah blah
MissGoLightly Posted November 28, 2009 Posted November 28, 2009 im trying to find a few small things to show her that I picked up on a few of her interests and am trying to be somewhat thoughtful....Im starting to think maybe I dont know anything about her! ...ok, so what are some of her interests, what kinds of things does she have in her room, etc.? No one on this forum is going to be able to help you be "thoughtful" since we don't know her.
Author JL911 Posted November 29, 2009 Author Posted November 29, 2009 I actually spent the night just kinda looking over her room tonight...lol She has some various works of art/prints in her room, none are in frames that match so im thinking about maybe doing something possibly framed.... Shes crazy about her little dog... She likes to travel.... Shes a gadget whore...Ipods, Iphone, Notebook, Mini Notebook... Shes a bit of a brain... She likes movies She likes to read and likes the dorky Harry Potter, and Twilight books...But owns them already... I dont think she has a particular genre of music she listens too... She is always cold....
JaggedRoad Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Go to Armani Exchange and get her a scarf along with a set of hat and mittens. Also get her a book (I suggest 1000 places to visit before you die). And to top it off, get her that digital camera.
alphamale Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 no, get her one of those new-fangled video games geared towards girls like "DJ Hero"
Boundary Problem Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Don't buy women stuffed animals. Or gift certificates = handing your wife cash for xmas - nice. I'm not buying any gifts for men this xmas. Why should I.
New Again Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 A handblown glass travel ornament (I think Nordstrom has them) and a giftybox (google it) - there's your $100 and it's sweet, thoughtful and romantic.
Devil Inside Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 You still have time. The key is to give her something that could only come from something that you and she share. So when she opens it she thinks "this could only have come from you, and the way you know me." So start having some conversations. Start remembering all your little inside jokes. IMO I would not go overboard with jewelery or gadgets.
jerseyboy Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Two months the instinct is to go cheap. If you really like her dont. And if you are tight budget wise, you can always get her that "one" thing, and a bunch of little thoughtful gifts that dont costt much individually.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Yeah, I wouldn't get her anything too extravagant after only two months. It screams "trying too hard." Even the "day at the spa" others have suggested sounds like too much to me. Get her something small but quirky and cool.
jerseyboy Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Yeah, I wouldn't get her anything too extravagant after only two months. It screams "trying too hard." Even the "day at the spa" others have suggested sounds like too much to me. Get her something small but quirky and cool. \ Its only trying too hard if she doesnt feel the same. If shes into him a cheap gift is going to throw her off. And then shell talk to her gf's about it, and theyll confirm all her worries.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 \ Its only trying too hard if she doesnt feel the same. If shes into him a cheap gift is going to throw her off. And then shell talk to her gf's about it, and theyll confirm all her worries. I didn't say cheap; I personally don't think that a gift under $100 is cheap. But I guess it depends on the couple; how serious they are, and his financial situation.
New Again Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 \ Its only trying too hard if she doesnt feel the same. If shes into him a cheap gift is going to throw her off. And then shell talk to her gf's about it, and theyll confirm all her worries. Since they agreed on a limit though, I assumed they'd both plan on spending close to the limit, so the amount he was spending wouldn't be an issue - but we all know what happens when you assume Also, since they talked about it beforehand, it would be rude for either to spend more.
Devil Inside Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Yeah, I wouldn't get her anything too extravagant after only two months. It screams "trying too hard." Even the "day at the spa" others have suggested sounds like too much to me. Get her something small but quirky and cool. I 100% agree here. Anybody can go out and buy some of these cliche gifts.
jerseyboy Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Since they agreed on a limit though, I assumed they'd both plan on spending close to the limit, so the amount he was spending wouldn't be an issue - but we all know what happens when you assume Also, since they talked about it beforehand, it would be rude for either to spend more. Ive never listened to those limits lol. And if I were a woman Id be insulted. if he stuck to it Women are always going to not to want to come off as greedy.materialistic. They all say dont get me anything, or anything expensive etc. Especially when your income is substantially higher. So if shes a secretary making 40k, struggling to pay her bills, I need to pretend her limitations? They arent the same, and Id read it as hes nott hat into me, or just f'ing cheap, regardless of what I asked. It would be different if they were both in the same situation financially, but only just. I think the non verbal communication from the guy is I value you, and would take care of you. And I think thats how most take it.
New Again Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 I actually spent the night just kinda looking over her room tonight...lol She has some various works of art/prints in her room, none are in frames that match so im thinking about maybe doing something possibly framed.... Shes crazy about her little dog... She likes to travel.... Shes a gadget whore...Ipods, Iphone, Notebook, Mini Notebook... Shes a bit of a brain... She likes movies She likes to read and likes the dorky Harry Potter, and Twilight books...But owns them already... I dont think she has a particular genre of music she listens too... She is always cold.... You're on the right track I think...but your problem is that you're still not thinking about how her interests and things she already HAS can translate to a gift (beyond the frame thing). Just as an example: I have a new-ish friend who takes TONS of pictures; she prints a lot of them out and she loves making collages as gifts for friends, making scrapbooks with them, etc. She often prints out her digitals to give to people. So I chose that as my theme and got her a nice photo album for herself (shockingly she doesn't have any); storage for all the extra prints she has; and a book that has ideas on creative ways to turn her photos into gifts. I know that she will think this is a thoughtful gift. Maybe another way to think about what kind of gift to get her is to think about what dates you've been on. For example, if you went to a museum together, maybe get her an art book about one of the exhibits you saw, or a framed print of one of the pieces she really enjoyed. If you spent a day visiting galleries and small shops/boutiques, maybe you go back and get her a distinctive gift from one of those stores. Etc.
New Again Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Ive never listened to those limits lol. And if I were a woman Id be insulted. if he stuck to it Women are always going to not to want to come off as greedy.materialistic. They all say dont get me anything, or anything expensive etc. Especially when your income is substantially higher. So if shes a secretary making 40k, struggling to pay her bills, I need to pretend her limitations? They arent the same, and Id read it as hes nott hat into me, or just f'ing cheap, regardless of what I asked. It would be different if they were both in the same situation financially, but only just. I think the non verbal communication from the guy is I value you, and would take care of you. And I think thats how most take it. Maybe. I personally am embarrassed by that scenario. It really sucks when the guy can afford to spend more/be more extravagant in regards to gift giving, and he does so.
Author JL911 Posted November 29, 2009 Author Posted November 29, 2009 Ive never really listened to limits either...Just I didnt want one of us to go real overboard...We both have credit cards, so it wouldnt be all that hard...lol Neither of us make huge money by any standards, but I do ok for myself ($30k), but am still quite young...She works full time and is in grad school at the same time, so shes fairly spent on cash and I dont want her to feel the need to go crazy on me and have one of us end up spending a ton more than the other...So I tried to just ball park how much I was going to spend on her... I plan on going in the $150 range...Again I didnt want to get too carried away simply because its early on in the relationship...I didnt want to get very very heavy as far as romance...Although we are very much happy together... Plenty of things i could buy...Just wanted to strike a good nerve with what I do buy...Digital camera it just seems too easy...Plus the one she has her mom bought her so i dont want to step on those toes... There are a few little funny things I was planning on getting her...
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