kimflute26 Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 Ok so... I just started going out with a new guy. He's attractive, really nice, fun, seems to really like me a lot, and we're having a great time together.... But.... I'm noticing that his breath is not always the freshest. I mean it's not totally awful but I definitely notice a bit of a smell that can be off-putting when we're close. We've been seeing each other for only about a week... I don't think this is something I could just forget about because I am aware of it and it's affecting my overall attraction level to him. So how do I mention it? Please don't give me the "offer him a mint or gum" suggestion because trying to "trick" a person in a situation like this would only be a temporary fix. Is there any way for me to mention this to him now without totally hurting his feelings? I'm thinking I just need to say it, and if the whole thing crashes and burns as a result then it's out of my hands... What do you think?
Katrina65 Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 Hey Kim, Been in the exact same situation. I would be honest with him. In my own situation, if finally got to a point where I was turned off from being close to him. I finally was honest with him, but WAY too late--I'd already checked out of the relationship. If his breath is that bad, it could either be a simple fix (he needs to consider better oral hygiene--i.e. brushing and flossing more regularly). OR, it could be, he seriously has a tooth issue, and needs to visit a dentist. For instance, he may have an infection in a tooth which is causing the odor. Taking care of that could remedy the problem (this situation happened to a friend of mine. Her boyfriend needed a root canal, and as soon as that was taken care of, the bad breath vanished). It's only natural for a human to be turned off by that smell, as it could be indicative of lack of good health. Anyhow, I'd try to break it easy to him. Tell him you want to be close to him, but that you feel bad even mentioning it, but that the odor is making it hard for you to be close. And see if he would be willing to brush or visit a dentist. Again, remind him, it's because you DO like him and want to be close, and the last thing you want to do is hurt his feelings. It may hurt his feelings or bruise his ego, but, if he is serious about things, I think he'll look into the issue at some point. And if he doesn't, it's still early and you haven't gotten too attached yet. You don't want to be in a situation where you are with someone long term, and you feel disgusted whenever you have to get close. That wouldn't be fair to either of you. BEST OF LUCK!!
Author kimflute26 Posted November 25, 2009 Author Posted November 25, 2009 Brilliant advice Katrina... I really agree with it all! I can see that if I don't mention it I may get to that point of no return too... So I'm going to say something about it the next time we talk. Sooner the better I think. Thanks for the input!
radwimps Posted November 26, 2009 Posted November 26, 2009 if you guys have a mutual friend, tell the mutual friend to report what you said back to the guy. But be sure not to have YOU mentioned. Nothing hurts like a "Your breath smells" from the girl you like. Men are more sensitive than you'd think. This is coming from a guy btw
Recommended Posts