mr.dream merchant Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 Lately I've been super picky about girls I try to hook up with. They can't be too easy, but not too prude. For some reason, if I notice that she's a party girl (clubs and parties every weekend) I kind of just...let them fade away. Dunno what the hang up is on the party girls for me. They're lovely, but its like all they care about is getting sauced and going out. A couple what seemed like really good catches, after getting to know them, they revealed alot about their personality to me, and meh..kinda just let them fade away as well. I'm not even looking for anything serious. Don't know what I'm looking for to be exact. Confidence and looks are through the roof, as well as the money (for those of you who followed me back from my struggling/broke/unhappy days with my ex). But now that I have all of that, its like I got cocky? But not even in a cocky way, more like a humble and subtle way. I just don't pay many girls any mind. This is what it means to "not settle" I suppose? Met lots of girls, none are making the cut. Its almost as if most aren't worth my time and romantic interest. Maybe I have a huge self entitlement complex pole jammed up my ass but girls that really catch my eye aren't around. Do any other guys have this problem? My peers, they all seem to settle and end up unhappy. Me? I'm doing more getting to know the other person, see what they're about, but they don't make it too far. Is there such thing as having too high of standards? If I were buying an orange, why would I go for anything less than the ripest one? Now I can understand why attractive women are the way they are. No one wants to settle. You want the best there is. Problem is I can't get mine! Not asking for much here: Attractive (to me) In shape Classy And some form of intellect That's all I want.
phineas Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 I'm seperated getting a divorce. I've had women show interest in me. I don't think I want to date, but It doesn't matter because I wasn't really interested in them. These are women i found very attractive. Until I started talking to them. Talking to one was like listening to a college professor ramble on the other seems like a party girl & that really doesn't interest me either. I don't think it's being picky. My view is why waste time & energy on the wrong person when I'd rather stay single until the right one comes along.
Woggle Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 I am actually quite picky about a woman I would consider long term material. A man has to be very careful or he ends up like the men on the divorce forum.
espec10001 Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 Yeah after a few failed relationships you start to become weary of crazy chicks. Problem is you can't really tell which ones are crazy and which ones are NOT that crazy until you get to know them better. By that time it's too late.
Woggle Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 Yeah after a few failed relationships you start to become weary of crazy chicks. Problem is you can't really tell which ones are crazy and which ones are NOT that crazy until you get to know them better. By that time it's too late. One a man fine tunes his instincts he can tell. I can't even explain it but after being through the ringer with some pieces of work and observing women I can spot a woman's true colors pretty fast. Also if a man projects a certain vibe it helpes weed out the crazy ones.
espec10001 Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 One a man fine tunes his instincts he can tell. I can't even explain it but after being through the ringer with some pieces of work and observing women I can spot a woman's true colors pretty fast. Also if a man projects a certain vibe it helpes weed out the crazy ones. Problem is I believe they are all crazy to a certain degree. I mean chicks are nice looking, but some of them, when they talk...I just want to RUN AWAY AHHHH! Plus, most of them just seem downright boring. I mean I know this doesn't apply to ALL females, but there are so many chicks out there that don't have ANY hobbies. Getting drunk with your friends and texting are NOT hobbies! Don't get me wrong I've met some cool chicks that had hobbies and were good at them but they were already taken.
Ody Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 They can't be too easy, but not too prude. For some reason, if I notice that she's a party girl (clubs and parties every weekend) I kind of just...let them fade away. OK So you don't want them sleeping with any other dudes. Check. I'm not even looking for anything serious. OK So you want to be able sleep with other chicks if you feel like it. Check. Not asking for much here: Attractive (to me) In shape Classy And some form of intellect Hot smart and self sufficient. So basically you are looking for a hot, smart, self sufficient girl who isn't going to pursue other men but doesn't mind if you decide to chase some other skirt. Yeah this might take a while. Sorry but really "not too easy / not a party girl" and "I'm not looking for anything serious" can only be interpreted in one way. If you can pull it off, more power to ya. I'm with you though on talking to women who initially seem cool, and then after a while you're just like, meh... totally understand where you're coming from. Probably a two way street though, I bet it happens to women too.
phineas Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 I am actually quite picky about a woman I would consider long term material. A man has to be very careful or he ends up like the men on the divorce forum. There are some horror stories there. Including my own.
Pizzaman81 Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 Not asking for much here: Attractive (to me) In shape Classy And some form of intellect That's all I want. I think those are bottom line requirements for me. If you think that's picky, you haven't met me yet! Well I hope you won't that would be weird. Unless you're cool. Mine are... same as yours above plus Good family background good education Ambitious Not lazy knows how to dress well and attractive at least 5'6" And i'll emphasize on your "classy"
cognac Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 I find it very difficult to deal with women. 99% of the women I meet on a daily basis have cookie cutter personalities and have fragile little ego's. Women are also the biggest and most active group-thinkers, they fear anyone who thinks a little different or who challenges the way they were taught to be or think. They struggle to comprehend and digest information or ideas that do not come from a system-approved source like their professor or the boobtube. Truly critical thinking and ingenuity I am convinced is a uniquely masculine trait. I have met women who seem somewhat interesting but they are always without exception older than me by a decade or two. Other girls who are somewhat attractive and pretty easy to get along with are always with a boyfriend. I've learned in general that a man has to compromise if he wants a girl in his life. Just talk and do fun stuff with your male friends and keep your relatively pretty girlfriend around for after.
jerseyboy Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 I find it very difficult to deal with women. 99% of the women I meet on a daily basis have cookie cutter personalities and have fragile little ego's. Women are also the biggest and most active group-thinkers, they fear anyone who thinks a little different or who challenges the way they were taught to be or think. They struggle to comprehend and digest information or ideas that do not come from a system-approved source like their professor or the boobtube. Truly critical thinking and ingenuity I am convinced is a uniquely masculine trait. I have met women who seem somewhat interesting but they are always without exception older than me by a decade or two. Other girls who are somewhat attractive and pretty easy to get along with are always with a boyfriend. I've learned in general that a man has to compromise if he wants a girl in his life. Just talk and do fun stuff with your male friends and keep your relatively pretty girlfriend around for after. BS Mnay of the most interesting people I know are women. I generally prefer female company even if tis just to hang out
EarthGirl Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 (edited) I find it very difficult to deal with women. 99% of the women I meet on a daily basis have cookie cutter personalities and have fragile little ego's. Women are also the biggest and most active group-thinkers, they fear anyone who thinks a little different or who challenges the way they were taught to be or think. They struggle to comprehend and digest information or ideas that do not come from a system-approved source like their professor or the boobtube. Truly critical thinking and ingenuity I am convinced is a uniquely masculine trait. I have met women who seem somewhat interesting but they are always without exception older than me by a decade or two. Other girls who are somewhat attractive and pretty easy to get along with are always with a boyfriend. I've learned in general that a man has to compromise if he wants a girl in his life. Just talk and do fun stuff with your male friends and keep your relatively pretty girlfriend around for after. women tend to have "fragile little egos' because of all the a$ses like you who abound and they just cannot seem to escape and claim things like "Truly critical thinking and ingenuity I am convinced is a uniquely masculine trait". We are just human just like you, not superheroes, we can have great self esteem be very smart and brave but we cannot be immune to all this stuff that goes on and not be at all affected, but we are not weaklings either. People like YOU and YOU yourself are the exact reason that women have these fragile egos which you find so unnattractive..so if you want someone to complain about complain about YOURSELF and blame YOURSELF if you end up cold and alone. Edited November 25, 2009 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
EarthGirl Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 on a lighter note...this one mr dream, made me lol.. "But now that I have all of that, its like I got cocky? But not even in a cocky way, more like a humble and subtle way" I'm just teasin ya, but that was just too much , made me giggle..you're cocky, but what you're NOT cocky exactly, you're cocky but in a more like a humble subtle way? LOL you can't make this stuff up...you should write for a sitcom or something. But yeah no offense but it kinda sounds that your search for love is more like running auditions.
EarthGirl Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 OK So you don't want them sleeping with any other dudes. Check. OK So you want to be able sleep with other chicks if you feel like it. Check. Hot smart and self sufficient. So basically you are looking for a hot, smart, self sufficient girl who isn't going to pursue other men but doesn't mind if you decide to chase some other skirt. Yeah this might take a while. Sorry but really "not too easy / not a party girl" and "I'm not looking for anything serious" can only be interpreted in one way. If you can pull it off, more power to ya. I'm with you though on talking to women who initially seem cool, and then after a while you're just like, meh... totally understand where you're coming from. Probably a two way street though, I bet it happens to women too. good deciphering skills Ody! impressive.
Author mr.dream merchant Posted November 25, 2009 Author Posted November 25, 2009 Well hopefully Ody was just kidding with his/her analysis of my post. The initial post was done on a brainstorm run because I was off to work. More to the point. I want a girl with class and self-respect before anything. What I meant by not looking for anything serious is, I don't enter the dating scene with that thought in mind. I don't tell myself in my head "Okay I'm going to be serious with this girl" if I just met her. I take the time to get to know them, see what they're about, their values, class, etc etc. After all that is said and done, depending on what I've seen from her, is when I make the decision to be serious with her or just let her go so I can find another more worthy of my romantic interest, time, money, and whatever else I have to offer. The process has been so grueling. I've weeded about about 10 different girls, none of them I've seen true interest in besides the initial physical attraction, which isn't enough to keep me at all. I guess I've gotten cocky because I get alot of positive attention from females. I can't really explain it, maybe cocky isn't the word? Self-entitlement? I just feel like I deserve what I want, and I should be able to get what I want no problem because I bring alot to the table as far as goals, looks, ethics, etc goes. I've been feeling a bit more empowered because now I realize more than ever that I have the power of choice, where as alot of guys feel they don't or actually don't, and usually girls always have it. So its like I'm on an even playing field with my attractive female counterparts. Its really boosted my head up a bit but I don't let it get the best of me, if anything its flattering but it helps me see things from the lovely female's point of view in terms of selecting a partner. I want the best one possible. And settling is not an option. Hopefully this clears some things up. Or you can over analyze and take what I said out of context. No biggie, I'll be around to clear things up.
Woggle Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 There are some horror stories there. Including my own. I think that every man has a horror story or knows somebody with one. A man has to know what a woman is made of before he makes any commitment.
EarthGirl Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 I think that every man has a horror story or knows somebody with one. A man has to know what a woman is made of before he makes any commitment. indeed...and vice versa..just no obstacle courses or pop quizzes for the selection process please..lol.
Johnny M Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 Met lots of girls, none are making the cut. Its almost as if most aren't worth my time and romantic interest. Well, it's true. Most girls aren't worth your time. There's nothing wrong with being picky.
EarthGirl Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 Well, it's true. Most girls aren't worth your time. There's nothing wrong with being picky. many girls are worth your time...girls are awesome! (as are guys)..BUT maybe you have to find the right one to be worth spending a whole lot of your personal time with to feel right about it. That's only right and natural. But (this is my last post...check personal rants for explanation)...I really seriously can't help picturing the old "fame" movie when they ask the dancers to get into two lines...you know, step forward dancer number whatever, or step back...and then after much tense moments , they tell them which line is in and which can go home and cry over their unrealized dreams. which ones" made the cut' and which ones were "weeded out"...capish? (don't know how to spell that, but yeah...)
Ody Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 Well hopefully Ody was just kidding with his/her analysis of my post. The initial post was done on a brainstorm run because I was off to work. Sure it was flippant and in jest because the internet's more fun with humor, but if you say "I am not looking for anything serious" then people are going to assume you are trying to sleep around. Especially if you are as confident and attractive as is claimed here. Fair or not, this phrase is pretty commonly used that was so if you don't want to be interpreted that way don't use that phrase. Hopefully you just say that here and not to the prospective missus.
Ody Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 good deciphering skills Ody! impressive. Hmm... not sure if serious... indeed...and vice versa..just no obstacle courses or pop quizzes for the selection process please..lol. I actually had a girl give me a little quiz on a date. It was fine though, we already knew each other a bit by then and so I knew I was going to "pass" thus it wound up more of a silly little flirty thing than a stupid quiz on a date. It helped that she was really hot. Hehe - I wouldn't recommend date quizzes for either gender though.
phineas Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 I think that every man has a horror story or knows somebody with one. A man has to know what a woman is made of before he makes any commitment. I hear ya. But i knew her for almost 4 yrs before we were married then a yr after that with a new baby in the house she was online dateing. I guess all I can say is I learned to watch out for the warning signs & will do better next time around. Hence why I also see myself being picky when it comes to women & an actual exclusive relationship.
jerseyboy Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 I hear ya. But i knew her for almost 4 yrs before we were married then a yr after that with a new baby in the house she was online dateing. I guess all I can say is I learned to watch out for the warning signs & will do better next time around. Hence why I also see myself being picky when it comes to women & an actual exclusive relationship. Ouch Damn
Recommended Posts