dave22 Posted November 18, 2009 Posted November 18, 2009 I am interested in this friend of mine. I think we have a lot in common and at least I enjoy being around her (I think she must think the same). But it seems she only thinks of me as a friend. What can I do to make her change her opinion of me? Should I date other women more often? Should I talk more about other women? Is there anything I can do?
jerseyboy Posted November 18, 2009 Posted November 18, 2009 Yes Stop deceiving women into friendships with the hope that after enough time has passed they'll come to see how wonderful you are and jump you one day. You wanted to be the guy she could unload all her bs on, the stuff the guys who are actually diddling her dont want to be bothered listening to. and you got your wish Grats. Enjoy the endless drama
Yukikazi Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 You realize there is actually an entire section for this?
DustySaltus Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 I am interested in this friend of mine. I think we have a lot in common and at least I enjoy being around her (I think she must think the same). But it seems she only thinks of me as a friend. What can I do to make her change her opinion of me? Should I date other women more often? Should I talk more about other women? Is there anything I can do? How does she react when you tell her you are dating other women?
Midnight Rider Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 I am interested in this friend of mine. I think we have a lot in common and at least I enjoy being around her (I think she must think the same). But it seems she only thinks of me as a friend. What can I do to make her change her opinion of me? Should I date other women more often? Should I talk more about other women? Is there anything I can do? Very easy. Next time you go out, just plant one on her lips and try make out with her. It's going to require some balls, but believe me, you will get out of that zone and know where u stand. Good luck.
A O Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 Stop deceiving women into friendships with the hope that after enough time has passed they'll come to see how wonderful you are and jump you one day. Exactly. Can't be emphasized enough!! .
boogieboy Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 You have too much exposure to her. Once youre in the friend zone you cant get out unless the woman really wants it. You cant be so available to hang with her, you have to be too busy to talk to her, and busy with other women. Your life has to be exciting, for her to want to be a part of it. "I have a date-im going to see". Then she has to see you with other women, she has to see women all over you. (jealousy - he has something they like) Right now youre not desireable to other women, in her eyes. You also have to tease her and not be mr nice guy with her. You have to be confident that you dont need her. Thats what you do to attempt to get out of the friend zone with her. Problem is, if you accomplish all this, you'll find a better girl in the meantime. She would have to see you in at least one somewhat committed relationship to know that she might want to be with you. She isnt really physically attracted to you otherwise she would have flirted with you long ago. Keep in mind that if you do things to try to make her like you, you most likely will be wasting your time because she most likely will not see you as anything other than a friend. I dont know why women work like that, but even if they liked you at one time, once they give up on you, thats it.
phineas Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 I think once you become her regular sounding board your done. From watching TV & movies, to get out of the friendzone you need to go off the grid to a far away place for college or the army or the peace corps for a yr or so with no contact then return all buff & tan & worldly from your experiences. when her friends start drooling over you, then she'll want you. It's the only way dude.
DustySaltus Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 I think once you become her regular sounding board your done. From watching TV & movies, to get out of the friendzone you need to go off the grid to a far away place for college or the army or the peace corps for a yr or so with no contact then return all buff & tan & worldly from your experiences. when her friends start drooling over you, then she'll want you. It's the only way dude. LOL, this actually makes a lot of sense.
sumdude Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 How do you get out of the Friendzone? Find another girl.
Midnight Rider Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 As I mentioned a little earlier in the thread, all you have to do is KISS HER. Very simple, no time wasting, instant results, and straight to the point.
BlueHarvest Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 You realize there is actually an entire section for this? I'm sure he does. I'm also sure that the lines between Friends/Lovers/Dating are blurred enough as is without you being the forum police mmkay? Leave the guy alone, he's here asking for advice, not to be jumped by forum trolls. Yes Stop deceiving women into friendships with the hope that after enough time has passed they'll come to see how wonderful you are and jump you one day. You wanted to be the guy she could unload all her bs on, the stuff the guys who are actually diddling her dont want to be bothered listening to. and you got your wish Grats. Enjoy the endless drama Ah sarcasm, the tool of the witless. This is just a possibility, as I don't know what his situation is, but I actually sympathize with his situation. There's a girl in my life right now who I've known for almost 5 years that I was never interested in before. We hang out on a consistent basis, and yet recently I have come to know her and we have had more laid back situations. I wouldn't necessarily call them intimate, and yet they are definitely more laid back then I would call any other situation in which I was "hanging out" with a girl. Again, I'm not saying his situation is like this, but it's better to err on the side leniency then it is to assume he's "decieving women into friendships". Generalizations and sarcasm will get you nowhere my friend." As I mentioned a little earlier in the thread, all you have to do is KISS HER. Very simple, no time wasting, instant results, and straight to the point. While this is probably the most direct method, it's probably the method that will have the highest knee-jerk reaction. By that I mean it'll either go REALLY good or REALLY bad and you will know....immediately. I'd like to take a moment and have people realize that part of being a girlfriend/boyfriend is being a friend. There is a reason that word is part of it. You are friends, but you are also more then that. I'm not saying that aspect or initation is for everyone. But entering into some relationships with naught but sex and a few dates under your belt may be the reason some of you are here. I mean honestly, those of you posting here have to realize. Any advice (including my own) has to be taken with a grain of salt. Why? Because YOU (the poster) are posting here. If you are such a great provacateur of dating knowledge why are you on this website? Makes you think doesn't it?
carhill Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 But it seems she only thinks of me as a friend. Tell me how you formed this conclusion. How is this woman different than or the same as the last woman you dated?
Author dave22 Posted November 21, 2009 Author Posted November 21, 2009 Tell me how you formed this conclusion. How is this woman different than or the same as the last woman you dated? I think the main problem is she just broke up with her boyfriend and it has affected her a lot. She has said it will be a while until she dates again. That and the fact that all her ex-boyfriends seem to be much different than me (i.e. they actually seem like pretty big jerks) and I don't see it happening anytime soon. She happens to be a good friend and so I think I will just accept that and date other women.
carhill Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 She happens to be a good friend and so I think I will just accept that and date other women. Based on your explanation, I think this is a good course of action
Sith Apprentice Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 It is too much work and not enough return on investment. Your better off starting with a clean slate with a new girl.
Pizzaman81 Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 ... What can I do to make her change her opinion of me? You can't. Date other women, start dating them and not befriend them. Usually attraction comes at the beginning.
radwimps Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 I have actually gotten out of the friendzone before(And actually dated her) it IS possible, but it is EXTREMELY difficult. What I did was, I completely ignored her(I knew her for about 3 years) for a few months, got to know many more interesting girls aside from her. Then you realize she's actually not that great(This is an important mentality). When we saw each other again, I kept it completely cool. I didn't talk to her anymore than I NEEDED to, answered her conversations in the most shortest manner possible, and stopped thinking about her all together. I just couldn't bring myself to be attracted to her for a while, and she was like wow, all over me. All in all it went fairly well for a few months, and eventually she grew back on me and I asked her out, dated, things didn't actually work out great between us but that's just that. I congradulate myself for doing the impossible(Getting out of the friendzone). so bottom line, what you need to do is, stop treating her like a princess and kissing her boot all the time. Stop seeing her all together for a LONG PERIOD of time(Atleast 3 Months), and then come back into her life with a huge change that she likes. Whether physical(Lose weight, work out JUST A BIT) or mental(more confident, cool, not so needy) is completely up to what she thinks lacks in you, and that is for you to figure. For more info, read up this article: http://www.thebachelorguy.com/skills/how-to-get-out-of-the-friend-zone.html
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