thedudeman83 Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 Hello... I am new here. I would like to befriend you all My name is Daniel Lee. And I have problems with dating lol... I am 17. There is this great girl I know who is 18, and she is Russian. We're both Pisces lol We are still in high school. I've known her since freshman year, and we're both seniors now. We became good friends and had a lot of things in common. Before I knew it, she turned into a crush and then into an infatuation. I kept it a secret for a long time, and she dated other guys during that time, much to my dislike, mostly towards myself for not having the courage to act upon my feelings. I finally got the courage to let her know my junior year, when I heard she grew feelings for me as well. I asked her about her feelings for me and she liked me a lot. She was however concerned about losing me as a good friend if we broke up. We went on one date... and that's it. It was my mistake of lying to her, causing her to feel abandoned that she ignored me, and not just a cold shoulder treatment but for months. We grew bitter at each other and it was not a happy portion of my life... And now some good news lol. We finally, for no real reason at all, started talking to each other again. We actually started talking pretty well considering we had no real contact for months. We grew close again and she considers me as one of her best friends. I still had kept my feelings for her all this time, whether I denied it or not. I told her again about my feelings and she had a mixed reaction. She said she didn't want to date me because it was weird, and if we broke up our friendship would be awkward. If I would ask her on a date she said she would rather "hang out". But when I would hold her hand in a more-than-friends kind of way, she would tell me it's weird but not pull away. And I've kissed her, and she also told me it was weird too but she let me. I've asked our mutual friend what she thinks of me, and he said that she's starting to like me a little again. A background would actually help a lot for the story. I'm a really shy type. I am a virgin and I have not kissed or had a real gf until her, and she is actually the first girl I've kissed. It's kind of pathetic actually, haha She, however, is quite the opposite. She isn't a virgin and she goes through guys really fast. Her longest relationship was three months long, and tells me stories about her exes all the time. I am confused to what her true desires are and I don't know what to do. Please, I need some advice... Thank you for reading my story!
onebigfatcat Posted November 17, 2009 Posted November 17, 2009 Is she Russian, as in grew up in Russia? Because that might change my answer a bit as Russian women grew up in a very different culture than most Americans are accustomed to. It sounds though, that she is a typical girl on the cusp of womanhood. She probably gets quite a bit of attentiona from the men in her life and hasn't quite learned how to deal with things yet. My advice would be to just back off. It sounds like nothing is really going to come from this whole thing. Live your life. Have fun. Meet people. Date other women. If it's meant to be, it'll happen. Just one of the unfortunate unfairnesses of life. A really good friend gave me a little note once when I was in one of those unrequited love type situations and I've carried it in my wallet for over a decade now..."you can't make a heart love someone."
mushmush Posted November 17, 2009 Posted November 17, 2009 and tells me stories about her exes all the time. I am confused to what her true desires are and I don't know what to do. Please, I need some advice... Thank you for reading my story! Don't like the fact she talks about her ex's all the time. It's not a good thing. One thing you must not to is door mat yourself. i.e let her come and go as she pleases and still be always waiting there for her/ doing things for her. Way to avoid this is to continue to live your own life, date other girls hang out with your own friends and not always be available for her. p.s you aint going to win her over by being the best friend/ nice guy.
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