conehead Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 I became friends with this girl (let's call her K) for the past 1.5 months and we chat on IM almost everyday. We met up a few times to hang out. A week ago, she set me up with her bf's best friend/house mate (we will call this guy U). She and her bf are super CLOSE with U. The 4 of us had a double date a week ago and U was ok. 2 days after we met, U called me for a one on one date. I wasn't really interested but figured I'd give it another shot just in case. We talked on Monday and set up our date tentatively on Sunday. He said we'd touch base later on the week to confirm the date. He never called me, but then we both knew we were going to K's bday party on Sat. So I saw him on Sat, and there were a few times when I tried to initiate conversation and he'd chat with me for a bit but then he'd get sidetracked with someone else who talks to him. Basically, I must have initiated like 3 times (while he did not initiate even once) but we still never had a real converstation at all the entire night. I brought another girl friend along and she told me that she was surprised that U didn't come up to talk to talk to me. Well Sunday morning, U texts me saying it was great seeing me last night and he asked if I was still up for meeting up later that night as we had tentatively planned. I told him it was great seeing him too, that too bad we didn't talk much, but that I'm going to pass up on meeting up at night because I had too much food last night at the party (ok I know, that was a really lame excuse on my part). He replied saying yea too bad we didnt talk much as he wanted to as well, and asked if we can meet Wed night instead. I replied saying I already have plans on Wed but will let him know if another time works ttyl. He replied lastly with an 'ok sounds good. ttys!' Did I come off as a b*tch here? I guess I kind of flaked, but the get together on Sunday was really tentative. And when I initiated conversation with him on Sat, he didn't even mention Sunday. I guess my fear really is that I'd lose my new friend K. I have very few friends because I'm somewhat new in town and I thought the 2 of us became pretty good friends. However, I did notice that I didn't mesh well with the other people at her party either. So maybe this whole U incident, in combination with that, might mean that our friendship is over . Anything I can do to lessen the blow?
dreamergrl Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 Why not just be up front. Plus, you had no interest, yet you kept trying to chat him up, then you pass on him asking you out. Game playing much?
Author conehead Posted November 9, 2009 Author Posted November 9, 2009 I partially lost interest BECAUSE when I kept trying to chat him up on Sat he just kind of ignored me. Normally I'd be upfront and tell the guy I'm not interested, but this is my new friend's close friend here. Telling him straight up 'I'm not interested' will make everyone very awkward. Plus, I still want to remain friendly with him because we have mutual friends...it's not as simple as some dude I met from a bar and can never see again.
Author conehead Posted November 9, 2009 Author Posted November 9, 2009 Ok well U asked me out because he wanted to try this one restaurant. Another friend of mine who is a girl also wants to try it. What if I invite U out but tell him I'm also bringing along my girl friend. Will that soften things up a bit? Or just make it worse...
Author conehead Posted November 9, 2009 Author Posted November 9, 2009 Anyone??? My friend just asked me about U today, and I told her that me and U are going to try to reschedule our get together....
C-i-C-u Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 Ok well U asked me out because he wanted to try this one restaurant. Another friend of mine who is a girl also wants to try it. What if I invite U out but tell him I'm also bringing along my girl friend. Will that soften things up a bit? Or just make it worse... soften things up a bit and make it better for you.
Author conehead Posted November 10, 2009 Author Posted November 10, 2009 soften things up a bit and make it better for you. You think so? I guess that is one option.
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