evanya08 Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 as before? maybe i'm ust being too sensitive but with the return of his wife saying she wants him back, suddenly MM does not seem so open & does not tell me as much about his family stuff as before. He used to confide in me whenever his mum & sister bickered. Recently his mum moved out from his sister's place as i heard from the brother inlaw but when i ask MM if anything happened recently, he just said "nothing". Apart from a still good sex life we also cuddle less now, he is also less affectionate then before in public & when i hug him in bed he doesn't hug back like he used to:( should i be worried? I'm pulling away a little so i dont seem to needy but this sudden change is scaring me.... Thanx for listening. (and its only been a year!) sigh* Link to post Share on other sites
lovelorcet Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 you need to make things a bit more clear. Is he still with his wife?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author evanya08 Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 you need to make things a bit more clear. Is he still with his wife?? I am the guest that posted "dealing with MM". Thanks for any input....things have been fine till a few days ago i got emotional and confronted him abt leaving W because i saw 2 messages from his phone from her 1 about money stuff & the other about buying him a bday present as his bday is coming up...the day i confronted him & cried & the day after things were still lovey & we talked & cuddled, kissed & cried then for a few days now things suddenly seem different? I'm going bonkers!! Link to post Share on other sites
BUTAFLY Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Sounds like he is detactching himself emotionally, either to access the situation and decide who's best for him, or because he wants his wife but at the same time doesnt want to hurt you. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 Butafly is right, sounds like he's detaching from you, telling you less and less so you'll know less about him and his life. He probably is confused, isn't sure who he really wants...Though (hate to say it) because he had a life with his wife, there are children, and that life is familar and safe to him, chances are he might go that direction... Do yourself a big favour, take control NOW. End it and just tell him it's unfair for him to string you along, not sure wtf he wants, going back and forth. Remove yourself from this situation for your own mental health. Why are you letting HIM make all the choices??? What about you? You love him and want him, that's obvious. But, you're getting so hurt by him. Leave him and make it clear he isn't to contact you in any way whatsoever, UNTIL he knows who he really wants. This way, you start your healing, you get some space to yourself too. Maybe this time apart will make you feel differently...Take a step back and see the whole situation for what it is. Link to post Share on other sites
Author evanya08 Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 he got no kids, marriage only lasted 6mths, relationship 2 yrs....they didnt even live together cuz e house wasnt ready...in the meantime i should detach myself too...everything was good before his W decided the man she's seeing is not good as MM...... and wants back in... Link to post Share on other sites
LittleLady Posted August 31, 2006 Share Posted August 31, 2006 So the wife was cheating on him too?? Is her husband doing the retalitory cheating or were they both unknowingly cheating on eachother at the same time? Sounds like he might be looking into giving his relationship with his wife a chance. He probably started bonding more emotionally with her. I don't know how a relationship like theirs will ever work. They both were cheating on eachother... why did they EVER marry? Link to post Share on other sites
Author evanya08 Posted August 31, 2006 Author Share Posted August 31, 2006 they didnt cheat on each other, they just see other ppl after their seperation... i'm outtie if he's just playin a fool i've just about had enough with men playin me out... for wat i heard from him & his friends, his wife was seeing someone else though he couldn't prove it... they were emotionally distanced, quarreled, his wife tried to change him & he was the one who filed the seperation cuz he souldn't take it anymore... Link to post Share on other sites
FallenPetals Posted September 1, 2006 Share Posted September 1, 2006 He's doing what most MM do when they don't want to hurt the mistress. They start pulling away to return to what they see as a "normal" life for them. He is indeed playing the both of you, probably not out of hatefulness or fun but because he wants his cake and eat it too. Thats what most of these relationships are about. I'm sorry you're having a tough time but do what WWIU said, end it now. Walk away and find someone who is available both emotionally and physically. You deserve nothing less. Link to post Share on other sites
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