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-   -   Why she still calls Hubby on facebook? (https://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/other-man-woman/654140-why-she-still-calls-hubby-facebook)

LGBJUNHAO 28th February 2018 1:11 PM

Why she still calls Hubby on facebook?
 
So My MM and his wife is getting a divorce. They are still going through mediation because she is dragging her feet.

Yesterday, I found on a comment she posted a public facebook post about a basketball game saying how happy her hubby would if he could go to the game.

Is it normally for someone who is going through divorce still calling their soon to be ex-husband hubby? Why she does that. It has been nasty between them during the whole mediation/divorce, but if you read the comment, you would think they are very much together and happy. Just can't wrap my head around it.

Anyone can shed some light?

somanymistakes 28th February 2018 1:24 PM

Really this could go either way.

Yes, there are people who will go out of their way to give the impression that they are still happily together with someone who is fighting with them, separated from them, divorcing them, already divorced them, or even already divorced them and married someone else. I've seen second wives, who were NOT OWs to begin with, complaining about the first wife randomly showing up and glomming onto her ex-husband at events and referring to him as her husband.

As for why? Sometimes they're delusional and think they're going to get back together. Sometimes they're just trying to score points, by looking like the nice, reasonable, understanding one... especially if there is a fight over children or finances going on.

On the other hand there are also MMs who lie about whether they're actually going through the divorce process at all. Unless you have verification, it's possible that she really does think they're together and happy.

But remember, facebook is a performance, especially on public posts! When my MM told his wife about me, she immediately took to facebook and started posting a bunch of stuff about how happily in love they were and how he would never, ever leave her... and tagging in his family so that they would 'like' the post. She never posted stuff like that before.

Adotta 28th February 2018 4:43 PM

Don't read into it. But I would try to get some verification that this guy is actaully divorcing. Mm tend to never really divorce. It's just to costly to us men.

MidwestUSA 28th February 2018 5:03 PM

I suspect your MM isn't as unhappy as he leads you to believe he is.

What evidence do you have that this divorce is actually in progress? Have you moved in with him yet?

LGBJUNHAO 28th February 2018 5:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Adotta (Post 7548072)
Don't read into it. But I would try to get some verification that this guy is actaully divorcing. Mm tend to never really divorce. It's just to costly to us men.

he's actually moved out and living with me now.

I showed the post to MM. he said she is delusional, and he couldn't control what she wrote.

CantTakeMySmile 28th February 2018 5:21 PM

maybe to piss you off? just a thought.


Delusional.... yeah, that seems to be a common word when someone wants to negate something.


Anyways, if you are comfortable with the situation, why look at her stuff anyways? Not being rhetorical at all, just really wonder what is the point?

anika99 28th February 2018 5:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LGBJUNHAO (Post 7548095)
he's actually moved out and living with me now.

I showed the post to MM. he said she is delusional, and he couldn't control what she wrote.

I thought the plan was for his wife to move out and then you were going to move in. what happened to that?

In any case, if you two lovebirds live together and are happy then why are still snooping her fb page and obsessing over what she posts? Just get on with your life.

LGBJUNHAO 28th February 2018 5:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anika99 (Post 7548126)
I thought the plan was for his wife to move out and then you were going to move in. what happened to that?

In any case, if you two lovebirds live together and are happy then why are still snooping her fb page and obsessing over what she posts? Just get on with your life.

She said she couldn't afford to move out, so he agreed to let her stay at his house until divorce is finalized. they are hashing out child support and parenting plan etc.

She did move out to live with her parents in burbs. The plan was for her to find a place of her own in the city. then she said she couldn't afford it, so they agreed to let her stay there until their divorce is finalized.

BTDT2012 28th February 2018 6:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LGBJUNHAO (Post 7548135)
She said she couldn't afford to move out, so he agreed to let her stay at his house until divorce is finalized. they are hashing out child support and parenting plan etc.

She did move out to live with her parents in burbs. The plan was for her to find a place of her own in the city. then she said she couldn't afford it, so they agreed to let her stay there until their divorce is finalized.

Does she know that the two of you are living together?

Adotta 28th February 2018 7:11 PM

Well maybe this guy is serious. He does seem to be making the moves to show it. Just be prepared.... Somtimes people get so caught up in a fantasy that they think the AP is what they want more then life but then they get buyers remorse when the fantasy evaporates. when the fun of the chase is gone. when the fun of secrets is gone. Keep an eye out for that. If he goes back on this all and reconciles with his wife or sleeps with her cut him off.

If this MM is all in for you you're one of the lucky ones. It usually doesn't work out that way.

Good luck girl!

LGBJUNHAO 28th February 2018 8:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Adotta (Post 7548170)
Well maybe this guy is serious. He does seem to be making the moves to show it. Just be prepared.... Somtimes people get so caught up in a fantasy that they think the AP is what they want more then life but then they get buyers remorse when the fantasy evaporates. when the fun of the chase is gone. when the fun of secrets is gone. Keep an eye out for that. If he goes back on this all and reconciles with his wife or sleeps with her cut him off.

If this MM is all in for you you're one of the lucky ones. It usually doesn't work out that way.

Good luck girl!

Thank you!

We have been together for a couple of years, so it is more than just infatuation. We are more like family.

CautiouslyOptimistic 28th February 2018 8:17 PM

Maybe she leads two lives. Her real life where her husband is leaving her for another woman, and her Facebook life where she wants everyone to think her life is perfect. Happens every day on Facebook!

LGBJUNHAO 28th February 2018 8:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BTDT2012 (Post 7548153)
Does she know that the two of you are living together?

She knows. When he told her he was done and wanted a divorce, She did tell him she didn't want the divorce and that she wanted to work it out.

Adotta 28th February 2018 9:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LGBJUNHAO (Post 7548197)
Thank you!

We have been together for a couple of years, so it is more than just infatuation. We are more like family.

That's nice. But don't forget he thought he loved her once upon a time. He did no favor to his wife. He actually did a pretty ****ty thing to her. Just make sure that's not YOU one day.

If he was a man of true 100 percent integrity he would have divorced his wife ages ago. But meh men (or women ) of 100 percent integrity are a myth anyways. He could still be a great guy even though he may not have handled his divorce perfectly. That's for you to decide though.

road 1st March 2018 9:05 AM

Let her stay, more like the lawyers are going to get her to
keep the house.

MM are liars and cheaters. Except this one never would lie to you,
about anything.


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