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Me and my (ex)stepmother so messed up.


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Old 28th February 2018, 4:47 AM   #61
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Yes I see my councilor today. I still have to go to bed and wake up and work most of the day but yeah I guess it's today... lol. It's 4.00 am here. And yes I will continue sharing posts with my councilor as well as suggest upping our meeting for a while to once a week. 2 weeks seemed fine at first but it's stressful having questions and things I want to talk with her about but having to wait. She actually offered once a week but I turned it down.

I will continue to show her my post. She has the link so she could be reading right now for all I know.....
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Old 28th February 2018, 9:37 AM   #62
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him and your stepmom are no more

confess to your therapist

do not confess to your dad, unloading your burden on to him
for your relief is wrong
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Old 1st March 2018, 10:37 PM   #63
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I'm hired!!!

So that happened fast. It's not line work but it's similar. I'll be making multiple times what I'm making now just to start.

I got a call from my brother last night. Somone he knew was hiring for cell tower work. I called. 4 hours later I met him and his partner. I start sunday.

I'm so Frickin happy! I'll be out of town 5 days a week but heck I need to get out of here!
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Old 1st March 2018, 10:48 PM   #64
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Congratulations, Adotta!!! Way to go!!!

Btw, how did it go with your counselor yesterday?
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Old 1st March 2018, 11:30 PM   #65
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Congratulations, Adotta!!! Way to go!!!

Btw, how did it go with your counselor yesterday?

Pretty good. I'm still absorbing it all. She pretty much told me to cool it with new girl. Says I'm not ready just yet. She wants me to see if I think about ex step much. That was a point I disagreed with her on. I actually got a little angry when she wouldn't drop the conversation and move on.

**** I just thought about it but I'll have to shift my meetings now because of the new job.

She is also digging into memories of living at my mother's as a child. She seemed pretty horrified about some of the things I told her. It kinda made me not want to tell her more , but I did.

I completely forgot to update about the councilor and the new girl. This new job has me skipping and jumping around. My cheeks are hurting from smiling!

I have to admit I'm probably not going to follow my councilors advice in regards to new girl at all. The breaks on this new relationship may well be broken. We have been seeing eachother alot. I had dinner with her tonight. She was helping me celebrate the new job. Shes not happy I'll be out of town from Monday morning to friday evening but she understands. She knew what I was making working for my grandfather and it's a very big difference. she actually said my weekends now belong to her! Lol. Oh we kissed tonight so I guess the whole dancing around eachother as "friends" is over. we haven't had the boyfriend and girlfriend talk yet but it will happen soon.

Last edited by Adotta; 1st March 2018 at 11:33 PM..
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Old 2nd March 2018, 9:08 PM   #66
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Your new job opportunity sounds great, Adotta! Also, it's wonderful to read of your enthusiasm for it!

Your counselor is wise and she is on your side! I hope you can find time to keep up with going to her, even if you can't go as often due to your new work schedule. The longer you keep her in your life the more history you'll have with her so will always have someone whom you can bounce ideas off of.

I also thought of mentioning earlier you may want to hold off on the new gf for now until you have some time away from your other situation to process and heal from it. However, it seemed to me your momentum with her had been building and would most likely continue no matter what I would post.

But, your counselor's response was true blue to you and indicates her integrity to encourage you in doing what is for your best, rather than taking the easy route of cheering you on with your new gf. That said, I feel sure she'll be there to support you no matter what decisions you make about your life.
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Old 3rd March 2018, 12:56 PM   #67
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Your counsellor takes a very directive approach. Do you know what her modality of counselling is?

Whether it's psychoanalysis, integrative or person centred?

I have to say I've been really impressed with your posts on other threads.

Considering your history, you are keen to help others in turmoil.
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Old 3rd March 2018, 2:57 PM   #68
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Nothing's beyond repair

but if your brain was a computer, you'd be served well to reformat it and replace it with a new operating system. Pronto.
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Old 3rd March 2018, 7:34 PM   #69
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but if your brain was a computer, you'd be served well to reformat it and replace it with a new operating system. Pronto.
I'm not completely understanding the analogy. My memories are reformatted but what is my operating system? My soul? My morals?

When you reformat and use a new operating system you are basicly destroying every last bit of information on the computer. Are you insulting me? I'm not garbage. I've made bad choices but I'm not "reformat" worthy!
Maybe a few updates and Antivirus/malware sweeps, but come on reformat?!
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Old 3rd March 2018, 8:16 PM   #70
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Well, it worked for some French guy and now he is the president of France.

The woman also cheated on her husband and the guy was actually her daughter's boyfriend.

and she is more than 20 years his senior.


But there is only hope if both of you see eye to eye.



Don't forget that she preyed on you while you were very young so that's not right at all.
So that's is unacceptable.

You think that you were the cause of all these problems, while she was the one who didn't teach you right from wrong.

She should have told you these feelings are normal as we grew up and sometimes we have odd desire but that not real and she is your mom, but she let you continue with your desire

I don't know about her, 15 years difference is not the end of life, not that extremely odd
but you were 15 at the time!

So that what's making it sick!

She might like you or love you or have a turmoil inside her, we don't know, but at the end of the day,
your relationship is not gonna work as she is

the mother of your brother
and a married woman.

and your father ex-wife.


Try to date people and explore life,

Go back to school, start at community college and go from there you will get education and you will gain back some of the fun of friendship and meet people that was robbed from you..

You are still very young and your life is ahead of you.


Your mom and dad, and this woman destroyed your past, don't let them destroy your future.


Also, reconcile with your brother!

Also, apologize to the people you bullied, some of them might still suffer inside because of the pain you inflicted on them! no matter how simple a bullying is, it still can break someone confidence and heart!

so apologize and start clean.


Needless to say, you need to stay away from your ex lover. '

Last edited by Noproblem; 3rd March 2018 at 9:18 PM..
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