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Crush on Doctor - Does he feel the same? [Update: Jan 2019 - Doc brushed me off]


The Other Man / Woman The other side of the story: Support and discussion for those who find themselves involved with a committed partner.

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Old 25th January 2019, 12:24 PM   #391
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Originally Posted by Garcon1986 View Post
<snip> My own previous graduate school called me to the supervisor's office the very next day because they were monitoring my facebook account, where I posted a particularly exasperating situation with a patient. You don't have this stuff in the world of nuclear physics or computer science. <snip>
Well I'm glad you were called on the carpet for talking about a patient on Facebook. That's extremely unprofessional even if you never named the patient, and if you think only doctors or people in other privileged positions have to abide by those kind of rules you couldn't be more wrong. I work in a mid level job. Pays well but doesn't require any impressive degrees and I have seen coworkers be disciplined and even terminated over Facebook posts. Negative comments on Facebook about the company, clients or coworkers is not tolerated. Doesn't matter if we don't mention names.
Also what do you mean when you say your heart surgery was "exposing her breasts"? Does a heart surgery patient not need to disrobe their upper body in order to be examined?

OP I think your doctor was unprofessional. I don't think he ever intended to have an affair with you but he still crossed boundaries that shouldn't have been crossed. Also agree that he has no business treating your mental health issues, however you are no innocent snowflake either. We have been telling you for ages that this doctor/patient relationship is not healthy so can't claim to be some poor naive damsel now. You have actually been very calculated in some of your actions to get this doctor's attention.

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Old 25th January 2019, 12:48 PM   #392
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I think Anika made very balanced points. I was also wondering if nuclear physicists and computer scientists are allowed to lay hands on a girl’s exposed breasts, sick or not
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Old 25th January 2019, 1:19 PM   #393
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So the circumstances were I was checking her postoperatively after heart surgery, and she immediately said "I'm not modest anymore, don't worry about it" while she was sliding her gown apart. My answer to that was to tie her gown up and just check the parts that were needed, with a chaperone.

As for the frustrations with patients - I've since learned to let people who don't want to be adults alone to do their own thing, if they choose to fall flat on their face, then they understand the risks of doing so. You still legally have to put up a vigorous fight if any parent chooses to willfully damage the health of their child - I typically put up my point of view and share with them how the family can gain from listening to my advice, rather than putting it in a patronizing tone. I let them win on some points (i.e. pharmaceutical companies are selling vaccines just for the cash), so they don't feel like they've been intellectually cut out. You win most and you lose some.
If I have a beef with my colleagues, I tell them in person. I've learned a lot since the beginning of trainee days =)

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Old 25th January 2019, 9:59 PM   #394
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Other than him not willing to to engage in something that could put is license at risk, Have you considered that he is happy married and he isn't intrested in having an affair?

You seem to forget the married part. It's lose lose situation. Time to switch doctors and move on with your life
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Old 26th January 2019, 8:51 AM   #395
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Thank you for your input... I will write more later as I'm working right now.
I think that almost every single angle has been looked at in this thread. I hope you come back to respond to us.
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Old 26th January 2019, 1:23 PM   #396
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@Anika:
If you don’t mind, can you elaborate on where you saw her being “very calculated in some of your actions to get this doctor's attention”? Just curious...
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Old 15th March 2019, 4:00 PM   #397
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OP: Any updates? Seems that I’m the most interested in your story
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