Shades of Grey Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 It's been 15 days after being utterly and completely in love with mm for three and a half years. I've accepted his decision, I know I have to move on but how? Things seem to be getting harder not easier, I thought I might start to feel even slightly better by now but I feel so so so desolate. How long will it take??? Link to post Share on other sites
TogetherForever Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 Hugs to you Shades, I can't answer how long but if you would've stayed with mm, the hurt would stay there forever. Now, there WILL be an end to the hurt. Tha't a positive to look forward to I believe. Make sense? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shades of Grey Posted June 19, 2007 Author Share Posted June 19, 2007 Perfectly. Need to keep trying to think rational thoughts like that I know. Just so tired. Link to post Share on other sites
TogetherForever Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 Perfectly. Need to keep trying to think rational thoughts like that I know. Just so tired. I can imagine how tired you are. Hey, you can check out the water cooler forum to lighten things up. It's pretty funny over there. Check it out. Link to post Share on other sites
TogetherForever Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 Hey Shades, I was wondering how you were doing today? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shades of Grey Posted June 21, 2007 Author Share Posted June 21, 2007 Thank you for asking. 17 days, no relief yet! Link to post Share on other sites
Onelife Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Pain Pain Pain. Yep I know what you mean about that. It's been 13 days for me too after the latest NC. I guess the fact that I am no longer in the rollercoaster ride helps me to feel relieved. Not that I feel great at all that it ends but just knowing that I won't have to go through all the drama of the ups and the downs that comes from being in the A anymore. At least I know I am at the beginning of the healing process...the FIRST STEP! Then second, third . . . . . . Let's look at it like this...."you can run from love but if it's really love it will find you" (again, the right way this time). If it is really what meant to be, he will sort himself out and come find you. Only time will tell. Hope it helps in some ways. Just have to stay positive and try not to make it worse than the way it already is. Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Let's look at it like this...."you can run from love but if it's really love it will find you" (again, the right way this time). If it is really what meant to be, he will sort himself out and come find you. Only time will tell. Hope it helps in some ways. Just have to stay positive and try not to make it worse than the way it already is. Be very careful of thinking about it like this. If a part of you is doing NC in hopes that he will choose to leave his wife, then you aren't doing it for YOU, you are doing it in the hopes of getting him. Different altogether, and far far harder to stick to. You need to work on you and healing you, and ONLY that. Healing will take time, but if you keep thinking or hoping that he will come back to you it will only take longer. Link to post Share on other sites
Onelife Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Thank you Silktricks! Great advice. You are right. See? How easy I let it slides! Maybe that's the reason I had that dream last night. I just started a thread about that dream. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shades of Grey Posted June 21, 2007 Author Share Posted June 21, 2007 Healing will take time, but if you keep thinking or hoping that he will come back to you it will only take longer This is so true! So many times within previous NC I have comforted myself with the expectation that it wasn't really the end and so eventually failed at every opportunity to make the break. This time feels SO final - so may times I have been in silent despair waiting for him to come back to me, this time I am in silent despair because I know that he won't. Link to post Share on other sites
TogetherForever Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Healing will take time, but if you keep thinking or hoping that he will come back to you it will only take longer This is so true! So many times within previous NC I have comforted myself with the expectation that it wasn't really the end and so eventually failed at every opportunity to make the break. This time feels SO final - so may times I have been in silent despair waiting for him to come back to me, this time I am in silent despair because I know that he won't. Hang in there Sades!! It WILL get better!! (((((((Hugs))))))) Link to post Share on other sites
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